I have not been awake, and again
In a trembling word, I have written.
I have a sweet song, not worthy of you,
If you were true, you could be untrue.
But who is your soul so clear,
Who were you, why would you hear?

O, sweet soul, hath thou but no glory over me,
Such a misery ain’t more mysterious than the sun;
More furious than hells can be,
But who says I shall understand thee
Who says I shall stay dumped,
Who says I shall stay trapped?

Perhaps, upon the death of such winds
T’is sad love is to be made unseen,
For like a battled desire
That ever floats about captivating raided skies,
Such a love never catches the rain,
but dances and falls into the sun.

Perhaps, upon the dying of the night
‘Tis the sun that shall rise,
And like a pictured light that dies
I could not meet you again in the skies,
To hail you back into my arms,
To wound myself, to live the evil past.

For a breeze of morning lights,
The planet of Love is on high,
But have you not, have you seen me?
I am like a lonely star in the rain,
And that bed of daffodil skies,
That clutches my single dose of cries,
Holier that they wanted to be,
But not a faint one to thee.

To dance with the drugged jasmine,
To dance in crowned loneliness.
To be tied to worried heat,
By  the mirth of a golden summer,
To laugh, but not in freedom,
To scold the unknowing nights.

To be in love, but not to love,
And to feel, but not to feel,
To feel not a whole, but half
Of my heart has been like a tattered sky
And soundly tears are not even there, no more.

I said to the rose, “The brief noon
Has gone, and so have its hairs.”
I heard no more, and thought ‘twas silly
To question its red poetry,
Whose sighs were those, and
Would thine ever be mine?

For such sworn words are bashful,
They cling to but avert me
Through the obnoxious night and day.
Such vanished worlds existed to me
Back then, in the rolled vine forest
But all hath now gone, scorching
Themselves in everlasting rest.

And whose promise was given to me
For none was like it at the brief night,
Nothing much of a rustling delight
When I had had a young day in wine,
And I had betrayed all in disguise,
Whose love is there now, to catch me wise?

And the soul of your height was in my blood,
And so was your skin, your fleshy touch
As the music of winter rang in the hall,
And long by the petrified garden I stood,
For I heard your rivulet fall,
I heard your memories twinkling on my road,
About my asleep, unconscious reveries.
Who would say I had not called your name,
Your name that is the dearest of all.

On the grass your steps are seen so clear
As those perfumes on the street stones,
I have never smelled any so dear,
My love, my sweet, my young heart.
My heart, that hath swollen in t’is heat
My darling, that I have left, but merry meet.

In the meadow then, your love so sweet
In the eerie untouched March wind,
Just like when we had met in November,
By the amber wood brown as your eyes,
The hollow gravel road that followed,
Meeting your gleeful shade tomorrow.

Our slender, our slender winter,
Full of milk, and magnolia trees in white,
You have hunted me again at eerie nights,
Even by the crying lights that have loved me,
A ghastly shadow that shall not leave.
Knowing your promise to me,
The lilies and roses are all awake,
They have sighed for me and melted for thee.

Our taller, our taller moon
Full of yellowness, and glinting green
You have haunted me and my weight of sins,
And made of me what I want not to see,
To apply the sun to my face, and blood
To apply such sins back again to my heart.

There has fallen a splendid star
From the grinning flower at the gate,
He is coming, my dove, my heart,
And the white leaves cries, “He’s late,”
And tells me I should not wait,
To turn around the bush then go,
Leaving his careless face, in the know.

There has gone a sweet universe,
A parting of my lover and verse,
He whose soul was uniquely sweet,
And ever is as, again, I remember,
I remember the days in cold and heat,
I do remember the memories, forever.

He is coming, my love, my sweet,
The air here is no more real,
Were it more than a spacious threat,
I would still hear no more, but hate,
To call out to the unheard name,
To call out to the fallen fall.

He is coming, my blood, my dear,
He is to love, to be back here.
And I am to love, to be again in love,
I have been in love in these four years;
Never have all these been so true,
Never have I heard, but it will be new.

And who says a lot about the tangled rose,
Now that the setting moon is gone,
That I have loved still the mist,
That I have believed in such bliss.
Cursed is the sun, and I believe it sobs
I heard the night sever its hopes.

I said to the Moon, “Gi’ me back my love,”
It told me it was dawn now,
And then dawn approached, I knew,
Turning all ripped anguishes to spring.
I could not sob, I could not sing,
I was not to long for everything.

I said to the Sky, “How gullible you are,”
But he said to me I would still love,
That I would not care, but to write
I would still care for your silent nights,
I would foster away my solitude
And read aloud my sober thoughts.

I said to the Stars, “How far you are,”
But they told me they wanted to write,
That to excite poetry here with me,
And such arts, to them, ne’er sleep;
The Stars are offspring to my lips,
Gasping words at my fingertips.

I said to the Rain, “How tame you are,”
It gave me a clear reason to behold,
For such a shower can be more daunting,
I have none in sight, none to hold.
All the risks I have taken in me,
All those sighs, smiles that I can be.

Hence! Even then I love you still,
And to see your smile, o my darling,
New joys are born, and stirred to life,
Bending towards me, singing,
Climbing their way into my thoughts,
And from the valleys underneath
Overcoming altogether t’ese bitter joys.

Hence! Even then I fancy you,
Speaking to me in shadow and flesh,
Although through a red flushed face,
And all is false, trembling in weird lies.
Coming to me in death’s daily form,
Having you by my side feels warm,
And to cuddle you here, in my arms,
Unlike the other bloodless, friendless nights.

Hence! Even then you live in me,
As you will always continue to be,
With a trickling love ever fresh to me,
With a hollow cheek and faded eye,
Like the chatter that shuns,
A hatred that sleeps while ‘tis awake.
I am lost here, with thoughts I yielded
And the dreams my rose shielded.

Hence! Even then you, a loving sight
Dearer to me than all hushed nights,
With one green sparkle and beyond
You remain as my everlasting song,
To make me write all over the morn
I have loved you still, all along.

To the Moon and back have I loved you,
To the Moon, that I have loved for too long.
You cannot even see me within this song,
You cannot love nor see me anew.

To the Moon and stars have I missed you,
I have seen your sins, and hearts *****,
I have searched for you around the sun
I have longed for you, trapped within me.

To the Moon and skies have I writ,
With not so much merit and a little wit,
I have loved you in a single heartbeat,
I have left you but, my darling, merry meet.

To the Moon and the heart that I knew,
There are not many words to utter,
That such feelings have gone forever,
And have you loved me, forgot me not?

To the Moon and lungs of the earth,
Have I loved again, within my breath?
Have I lost my poems and sights of death?
Have I been sunk in your cold wrath?

To the Moon and the rigid Sunshine,
I have believed not in your fate,
That such a chill still catches me by surprise
That such choices may not be wise.

To the Moon and Earth have I told you,
That all is not much like a children's tale,
Perhaps I can go again, wish me well,
There is not much of a love like you.

To the Moon and life have I seen you,
I have loved you as my fate, a fulfillment
That to wishful dreams such is a mate
Not to be with theirs, not too late.

To the Moon and Night have I seen again,
Have I read, and devoured frank white tales,
Have I longed, have I dreamed, and kissed
Have I fallen in love with a young twist.

To the Moon and breath have I heard,
And all was a nightmare to my chest,
The morning, such a shy dawn,
Is unlike any other night I have seen.

To the Moon and Light have I sworn,
That such a poet has sainted a tone,
She sits and stares, all in silence,
Love is love in her white solitude.

To the Moon and Fate have I told,
Such white nights are to behold,
And within them is a scary love,
What is not a scary tale to me.

To the Moon and Rise have I called,
Around the skies and earth to reach you,
You, whose gaze made me bare and anew,
I, who saw all the lithe winds in blue.

To the Moon and Snow have I gone,
To want to bring you to me alone,
To make myself known to such grace,
To love you and back again in haste.

To the Moon and bliss have I sworn,
That such a desire is not forlorn,
As far as my stories can tell,
So long as my lifeless dreams are felt.

To the Moon and shapes have I wanted,
I have wanted you like none else does,
With a ****** rose and sea that last,
With an ocean at present, of the past.

To the Moon and storms have I swum,
In such coldness, all longings must go numb,
But who would astound such loving feelings
Who should say yet, ‘tis a morning?

To the Moon and lands have I been,
To the swathes of love of the Neverland,
But who would whisk away such strange love
While there is much, there is enough?

To the Moon and day have I reached,
That such a chest is not bare, no more,
I have filled my love with a thousand days,
I have teased my sight with a hundred lights.

To the Moon and shores have I dreamed,
With a dark slice of weariness up high,
A tinge of bitterness is in your eyes,
A hint of sweetness at my sour nights.

To the Moon and heart have I sent you,
To the vast love I have unleashed,
That I want you but more in my arms
To such spilling lights, to such a free fate.

To the Moon and Sea have I sainted you,
In the so much rain like I used to,
I have sprinted to you, and run back again
I love you in the sun, under the rain

To the Moon and Soul have I burned you,
That you remain but a naive flesh to me
One that propels my heights, my destiny
One that I have all here with me.

To the Moon and words have I writ of you,
And chosen you to be my serene song
I have loved you with such trueness
I have loved you for too long.

'Tis getting late, and I miss you,
I miss you like I used to do
Your cold and clear and fair air;
The winds that followed me everywhere

'Tis not fate, but there was a poem,
I used to read at night in my room
Summer was gone, and I looked at the sky;
You were there to me, to my sight

Coventry, why did you falter me;
Why did you take it all away
You are not here to see me write;
You are not here to comfort my fright

Coventry, why did you love me,
Why did you make me go away
There was more love I wanted to give
There was a life I wanted to live.

Coventry, why did you touch my heart
With such a fatal and hard song;
That I could not take in return
That I had no voice to sing all apart.

Coventry, why did you burn me
And sink my white love back in the sun
And my cold winter, my solid night
My justice, all that had seemed right

Coventry, why did you **** me
Why did you peel my love at once,
And used a sword to seal my words,
To break astray from my whole world.

Coventry, why did you forget me
Why was all to you a lie
And was my love but a faint shadow,
In the white meadow, like one that has no tears

Coventry, why did you drown me,
With a lie that has grown false
Have you forgot the words you perused,
The poems of love, my soul's wisdom.

Coventry, why did you fail me,
Was I but an absurd flute to thee?
A flute that has in its chest no song,
Did I love thee for too long?

Coventry, why did you lie,
And make me look at the murky sky?
That day there was no cloud in sight,
None to be, and none to love again.

Coventry, why did you go,
I am not free, and I cannot be,
There is too much darkness, to be here
Too much that I shall not hear.

Coventry, why did you turn,
There was but none new to burn
And you could have loved me,
I was like a lost bird in the fir tree

Coventry, why did not you forgive,
Had I been mistaken much to live?
Had I been unloved too much,
Had I come from too far away.

Coventry, why was there no reason,
At summer, there was no more season
And why did you bring me back,
Why did you not wait for me.

Coventry, why did you make me cry,
When I had too much love to give,
And all of my heart has rusted away
Just like you want it to have, today.

Coventry, why did you make me sad
And it feels like there is no more to read,
And no more blood in my heartbeat;
All was sorely left in my last poem.

Coventry, why did you alter me,
That I had nowhere else to be
I had no other poetry to love in sight;
In my conscience, at the truest nights.

Coventry, why did you leave me;
Why did you steal my voice today,
You tore my rains and kisses away,
You made me cease to love.

And here I am, back in my anthology;
Although I have immersed myself in clouded sleep,
Whose sickly sweet could heal me no more;
I was but a tempted dawn in his lap,
A frail daughter of fate, and chastity;
My fatal sleep alone was a curse, to one and others.

Silence, beautiful voice!
How should I instill thee—and instill thee more?
And how wert thou so aloof, though deeply poised?
For every breath that I writ, and taste
is but a luminous sign of death;
an unhappy ding towards my presence,
and its mortal cringe, that is ending by the day.
And thus in such a life there is no wit
Nor cold enough, to redeem its wrath;
A wrath that shall leave this earth untouched,
A grime that hastens much, that all joy
Shall sicken and roam fast, unconsumed.
Why should all be jolly—but not to me,
Not to me, a dutiful daughter of my past,
But whose heart has hurt, by its last;
Whose tears are pure, but not profound;
Ah, me, whom such bland minds scorn in their right,
Me, whom their commoners refuse in plain sight,
Me, whom hath lost my dream of the arts,
Me, whom hath died of my own screams at night!
Ah, who am I but to redeem my joy again,
and claim a delight that was not my friend—
Ah, and which conscious soul is but to comprehend its right,
The extraordinaire of which—that are not moral nor righteous,
Nor are their tendrils—which are not even theirs,
At such a hand full of perils, risky and scandalous.
Who is longing for the pearls of a vision,
Who yearns but for love, for reincarnation,
And no love is dubious, none that remains,
But oblivious, a dire threat to its loving friend;
My fate has lost its way, to the white and cold,
My love has gone, and shan’t be with me again.

Where is but my poem, my little flushed cheek,
Why were you yesterday so smooth and meek?
Where did you hold my destiny, with a fate so clear,
Why did you choose to love me, with a love so weird;
But with no real heart to love me, and my judgments,
Shall I but be allowed to make judgments?
For there were too many taunting ways in which love swore,
And again I was dragged to the vile hot shore,
So my wisdom has raged in a swath of labyrinths,
Too painful for a soul too mean, but not a poet;
Too indecisive to read, let alone to comprehend,
And too unloved to understand, nor seek in a daze,
Perhaps unloved by its own words, like a ******,
Immature in their own corrupt years, like you are;
You are a naïve product of my mind, you are pure,
Of whose love never my sound thought is so sure,
Though hastened by a bare world not ours,
Nor a cycle that is mine, with pain so sour.

Silence, my love; and let briefness lulls you to sleep,
To the lethal eternity which salutes you, be gone,
Gone away like an eerie fairy in mortal dreams,
With their gates ajar, welcoming you in such
clamped dramas, a loveliness without thee,
A cheapness I would not by—nor defend
On the name of my artistic soul.
Did my lavender greet you and cherish you again,
And shall such a loving bud be that of thine;
But to speak less, and remain silent, o my friend—
is but a garment; a nicety to the friendly mind,
Oft’ cornered in daylight, but glazy to the lone night,
The night is kind and festive, unlike the wan sunlight,
Rotting ever is its flesh, dimmed by such sharp sins;
And grandeur and artiste which I once befriended,
That I was a deep dear of whom—‘till I was torn,
By the disfigured spring and summer
Blaming the poor beheaded winter,
A thousand miles from here, into the West yonder.

But who is to love by the spring and bright,
But who is to listen, to hear by the moonlight,
To linger forever ‘till I catch your sight,
To hesitate to claim your love, forever;
Which steals and shine on a lie, that eternally;
Who stand not by my side, in a fateful wake
Of dozens of seas and shores—and untouched dust;
And then all died, so that I ask you,
My literature, whose heart has been but one love,
Whose heart been pained, and disgraced;
In a suited torment and whirling betrayal,
To see once more, a night of sparkles and shades,
To rejoice by a lake of wind, and beautiful glades;
To relish more the charm of poetry, and the beastly—
but glorious freakish rain, so long as you are with me.

In a thought of mine, springs the midnight air;
All is my free beauty so cold and fair,
And I am devoid of a hundred stellar suns;
The illiterate to read, the stifled anguish gone.

In a thought of thee, springs the buoyant mind;
A painting so clear with an electric lair,
That all are a guitar and drum, as it sounds;
That a renewed love has been found.

In a thought of ours, springs the forest rain;
A poem to dim down that eternal drain,
To cease the doubts, and decipher all pains,
Bring me my sweet love, my immortal friend.

In a thought of love, springs the live sonata;
That all hesitation is a panorama,
Like the dramatic act, and its tragedies;
I shall sink myself in thy melodies.

In a thought of breath, springs the sweet song;
That battles rage and its dark humour,
That all mirages shall live in downpours,
That all happiness shall last a night long.

In a thought of fate, springs the sweet poem;
All in my life is a literary grandeur,
All within me desires to writ and love;
All about me in a satin room.

In a thought of joy, springs the sweet tale;
I shall wish thee the best of all and well,
I shall wish thee love, and a story to tell;
In one decreed satire, and hurried wedding bell.

In a thought of two, springs our promise;
All my nightingale and its sweet bliss,
Who is to cherish thee, so grand and wise;
Who is to be thine, so wild as a surprise?

In a thought of one, springs unity;
That all thy beauty shall be rain and youth,
And a word of love forming in my mouth;
And two hearts joining into eternity.

In a thought of bliss, shall I be here;
Such miracles shall be found near,
Who is then to listen to bare wisdom,
Concealed behind naïve truth, inside a poem?

In a thought of light, shall thou be loved;
Among the thousands of larks in the woods,
For I have chosen you to be in my words;
To be my little star, to be my beloved.

In a thought of wind, shall we find cold;
For cold itself is peace on its side,
A turmoil blending into our awake night;
A disgrace dying by a thousand lights.

In a thought of cold, shall we find grace;
Naïve in its glimpses of faltered fears,
But knowing us both yet not;
That it can but challenge the tears.

In a thought of warmth, shall we find youth;
Its spirit shattering the tearful past,
And shall we run, to find in which another smile,
And wipe all our painstaking breaths away.

In a thought of theirs, shall we find hate;
Its song slaughtering the daisies of fate,
In its velvet ways that are so simple;
A harmless perfume to the demented world.

In a thought of Him, shall we find peace;
No prayer shall be void to a sacred move,
And then I shall unite myself with thee;
Like the song sings, the poet and her love.

In a thought of you, shall we find ways;
Perhaps hidden and buried in eerieness,
No thought is too airy, not in the day;
No space is too mild, nor are they cold.

In a thought of us, shall we find life;
You are my rose and magical truth,
That who refills my chest and breath,
That who delights in me, and my red fate.

In a thought of life, shall we find ease;
All about life are roses and raging beasts,
There is happiness to forgive sins,
There is joy to a poem, and what it means;

In a thought of breath, shall we find love;
That no wrath comes near, that we find home,
That poetic arch of mine and thine,
That all lust and enormity are gone.

In a thought of night, shall we be there;
Holding each other and on to the air,
That all tears sound hastened and weird,
That our damp love is all I care.

In a thought of charm, shall we be free;
All the storms that are not tears,
And freedom that shall be here,
Presenting itself to be with me.

In a thought of rain, shall we be fine;
And in one leap of joy, thou shalt be mine,
And be my poems and words everlasting,
In the dark of the night—by the morning.

In a thought of gloss, shall fear be gone;
And my sheer heart shall be thine alone,
Be my poem a book that chastely sings,
Be thou an angel that has wings.

In a thought of truth, shall life be ours;
That all is a tale at midnight hours,
And be like a poetry of unity,
My heart lives there for eternity.

In a thought that vast, who thinks about the past;
When we crave for the poem that lasts,
And who is to fret at this new wonder;
My heart lives there forever.

In a thought that wild, who thinks about sad;
My past has left my whole mad,
Agitated by our renewed delight,
Terrified by our new dewy night.

In a thought that hastes, who says about poetry;
That all is a song our hearts can bear,
That all is enjoined lips, and their beauty;
That all is more than what they wear.

In a thought that sees, who frets about love;
That love is a substance cold and free,
****** only between you and me,
That love is a word, and words are enough.

In a thought that hears, who trusts but words;
That words shall witness those who speak,
That there is idyll in such truth, and worlds,
That words are honest, but not sickly.

In a thought that listens, who saints the sun;
There is too much hate in its glued merit,
That all is a gale but not a careful breath,
That all is bitter, and not at all sweet.

In a thought that loves, who says about love;
That love is hidden within your bare voice,
And your bare voice, in your entangled chest,
The very place I shall find ease and rest.

In a thought that writs, who says about wits;
All is mortal when they have not to say,
That they are blind at night, and in the day,
That their flooded souls shall find none too sweet.

In a thought that reads, who says about fits;
All is silence so far as the eye can see,
And who is there to flock my solitude?
I am far from the sun; and its mock servitude.

In a thought that thinks, who is to love lust;
For lust shall lose hope in one curt day,
That all is there only for the sun,
Bathed in hotness, charmed for nakedness.

In a thought that bears, who is to love hate;
For hate is the chain of every devil,
And in whose devil the world shall lay,
As that in ours, through the night and day.

In a thought that springs, who is to lose thee;
I’ve all along in the glistening white chamber,
My whiteness has been purified close,
I shall not be gone, I shan’t be lost;

In a thought that lives, who is to writ’ thee;
I’ve loved all the while in life, and in my words,
That I’ve given my love there—and so to thee,
That I shall breathe, so long as thou love me;

In a thought that breathes, who is to love thee;
I’ve loved all the years, and meanwhile,
I have been pained, and yet shall not fail;
I’ve loved and carried you still, all the while.

In a thought that whirls, have I dreamt of thee;
That such a thought shall make me sane,
And such a curse is devoid of pain,
The curse to love thee dearly, my friend;

In a thought that bursts, have I been thine;
That all solitude shall, at once, be fine,
And our bliss is faith, and faith is tonight;
I shall wait for thee by white moonlight.

I am broken, I am broken inside,
My soul swallowed by the Nordic sea.
When am I but to see the Northern Light;
Their lights are ahead, above me.

Who says I shan’t sing but shall here,
For singing and hearing are inseparable,
Like the lonely souls of aging and youth;
Whose ends stand irreplaceable.

Who says I shan’t read but shall hear,
For reading and hearing are the same,
And so are the poesy and prose within me;
They all see through me alike.

And who says love is of insipid youth,
Had I given thought to your love;
Whose songs make me but hungry again,
Suspicious about me, unlike the rose.

And who says love is a sordid poem,
A phony line any may have writ,
And who one like me has in her room,
One that has not much wit.

And who says ‘tis not my Helsinki,
Within too much of a single beat,
None is faster than my heartbeat,
To love once more, like young poetry.

And who says old Helsinki shan’t love,
He has had much to understand,
That love is in his hold beyond reason,
A reason I shall see again.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t live,
Within too much of a long sigh,
Pampered by the bread of cold nights,
Asleep by the cheerful Northern Lights.

And who says my Helsinki is cold,
All the evil within their bold,
Too much have I hated and cried,
Too much have I seen the worst night.

And who says my Helsinki is bare,
I like the cool and safe midnight air,
With the green and silver trees there,
I have no time to waste its fair.

And who says my Helsinki is there,
With no love nor tune to love me,
All poems are a secret flute,
An eternity that waives sick truths.

And who says my Helsinki is sick,
Like a word chain tame and meek,
That I shall kiss his lucky cheeks,
That I shall seek to love.

And who says my Helsinki is red,
The twisting end that shan’t be met,
Whose winter smells like a summer lily,
Whose lavender blooms like a rose.

And who says my Helsinki has sinned,
As a lover I shan’t have seen,
Who might you be as a true lover,
Who might you be to love me, better.

And who says my Helsinki is late,
All was too young to receive their fate;
A bud raised in the summery hate,
Too small to be, naughty to the moon.

And who says my Helsinki is old,
There was a reason to behold,
That once appeared and spread again,
That once loved, and demanded love.

And who says my Helsinki is wild,
To climb the cooling clouds too high,
Bewitching youth on a Northern night,
Funny and bewildering like a poem.

And who says my Helsinki befalls,
We all hate longed for fields of fall
And the invigorating rain’s song,
After a fairy heat, for long.

And who says my Helsinki loves worse,
None is worldly in the wind of words,
Nor shall any witness the fall of me,
The fading of youth, its sallow skin.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t read,
With a simmering false that cheats,
Who says such immature threat,
That rains raise in their odd feeling.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t say,
All is rain in the Nordic West,
And the love prisons who want to see,
Charms those who linger to stay.

And who says my Helsinki shall fail,
None is so lithe, nor a fallen ill,
None has its least of temperaments,
None can adjust, all shall leave.

And who says my Helsinki is dust,
For dirt and debt cometh from the sun,
Such like desire—and the worst of lust,
With a love come undone.

And who says my Helsinki is free,
Whose soul is not bound to be,
Whose charm is thin that all see,
Whose love is vague.

And who says my Helsinki is a dream,
But reality truer than its own self,
That such words of his are precious,
A letter to read, a canto to my love.

And who says my Helsinki is a verse,
But a story that has heard the worse,
And who shall dream of which and the sea,
Who shall dare to mention the sun.

And who says my Helsinki shall age,
But a wise forgiver to all sins,
That age itself seems foreign,
That love itself matures, hence.

And who says my Helsinki loved once,
But not a voice to love again;
That love itself seems to listen
That misery itself shall laugh.

And who says my Helsinki is trodden,
And who says within which is disgrace,
A passion for fire is who is evil,
Ill as daylight, and tormenting.

And who says my Helsinki but echoes,
Within such a world of failed heroes,
I have but to me my deranged throes,
Which love to lay low about me.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t reside,
Ever since, have not I held my sight
And raised again to the Sun Kingdom,
I might choose not to retell my poem.

And who says my Helsinki is pride,
This heart is too open and too wide,
But I shan’t live again on the English side,
Nor ponder the Yorkshire suburbs.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t tell,
Ever since, have I hated farewells
That longed to put their hands in my arms,
Lulled to the night by my poet’s charms.

And who says my Helsinki is a curse,
Since then, have I hated bad wills
As though I myself would not again feel;
Feel a starry night still to far away.

And who says my Helsinki is not me,
With all my tunes too rich for a single verse
That shall excite nor tune to me not,
You are not much dearer, but worse.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t dream?
For I writ much only of a dreamer,
A dreamer that bathes in solitude,
A dreamer that warms, one that charms.

And who says my Helsinki shan’t stay,
The world has grown out of its way,
That the evil sun has rinsed itself again
And shall slowly **** the cold days.

And who says my Helsinki is dry,
That in his life that lies in the sky
No warmth shall come to life,
With a heart that shall love us not.

And who says my Helsinki is shy,
Rules but its own magical, sour song,
Basked in its reserved poetic triumph;
Not much of its own soul, not the poem.

And who says my Helsinki is far,
Farthest from the poet’s closed heart,
And shall be awkward, should it remain;
Their hearts shan’t live to sicken again.

And who says my Helsinki isn’t fair,
With none but a wrong air to feel,
Not a heart, nor a hand that feels not
Life and love are dead in the cold.

And who says my Helsinki loves autumn,
That all is beautiful is left in town,
And they may die of ugliness,
That all wander on their own.

And who says my Helsinki loves winter,
With northern lights icy-clear,
With three rainbows drawing near,
With white and fierce snowstorms.

And who says my Helsinki loves summer,
With a love not from the heart,
With a word not from the poet,
With a spear that can hurt.

And who says my Helsinki loves spring,
Who shall be there but the poet to sing,
Like the chained melodies in her words,
The Christmas tales in her sweet worlds.

And who says my Helsinki but myself,
The paint and poet together at once,
That a word is so bright as its colour,
That the colour makes its hours light.

And who says my Helsinki but my heart,
Who shall open it a door to cold nights,
To the heart that yearns for cold rains,
To the soul that misses the clouds.

And who says my Helsinki but my art,
Who shall make it a comfort today,
For the words that are patiently passed,
For a promise that is never wrong.

And who says my Helsinki but my soul,
Who shall present it with joy tonight,
Who shall bring it life and thought,
Who shall cheer it, who shall love it.

And who says my Helsinki but my blood,
Who shall amend its present sight,
Who shall condemn all that’s amiss,
Who shall wed it, shall give it bliss.

And who says my Helsinki but my might,
And sends to me another silent poet,
The son of cold, the offspring of dark,
The child of solitude that embraces me.

And who says my Helsinki but my sight,
That all afternoons are a night triumph,
That all that is sick becomes my poem,
That all long nights become my lullaby.

And who says my Helsinki but my sigh,
That I can love on moaning nights,
That I am the chaste that shan’t hide;
To come and again, in an immortal light.

And who says my Helsinki but my light,
That I can stay versed in such frights,
That I shall stay stern and not wobble,
That I shall stay here, and adore still.

And who says my Helsinki, but my love,
All in my verses are a blessing,
All blessed be, an innocent King,
All a cold dark, a sweet morning.

There is none like my Immortal,
A picture to my legit verse,
That I want to claim youth again,
But then I have lost you.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose piercing eyes make him younger,
As though they are a youth of their own,
As though they still have my love.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose smile brings white snow,
Whose chest fuels me,
Whose lips are my love.

There is none like my Immortal,
There is none as weird and charming,
That my brief love sounds too awkward
That it would not stay for long.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose playful mind stays through the night
Bearing soft torch lights within it;
And in him is the soul of a rose.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who once grasped and gasped with me,
With whirling air so mindful to see,
Who awakened my merit of love.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose mirth enabled me to see,
Excite the verses of my own poetry,
Incite every vein of my love.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who stood by my everlasting rain,
That all was but a filth of joy,
A naïve run across the downpour.

There is none like my Immortal,
Rich in his own myriad of love,
And the thoughtful kiss he has,
None has the warmth of his arms.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who jumps and plays under the sun,
All is fun for the whole world to see,
All is love to him, love is free.

There is none like my Immortal,
None has his sweet breath, and see—
None has his verse here with me,
None has his excited bold voice.

There is none like my Immortal,
None has his weight and air of truth,
That all that is not love shall love,  
That all that was sunlight is rain.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who loved me in snow and rain,
Who startled and awoke me again,
Who reminded me of my love.

There is none like my Immortal,
None resembles his mythical words,
That I forgot all our mortal homes
Thinking of his sweet love alone.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose cheeks have archaic colours,
Whose bashful smile is but as sweet
My heart’s darling, my living love.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose presence was a true mirage,
And who can see that cordial visage
But with the heat of a surging love?

There is none like my Immortal,
Whom I love presently and sweetly,
Whose sins I shall not come to resent,
Whose sordid love is ever present.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whom I love deeply and severely,
Who saluted me with a smile so shy
With a feeling so vivid and high.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who was so mild as morning dew,
Who greeted the quiet snow wildly
With a love so thoughtful and true.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whom I love calmly and serenely
Who charmed me with such faithful songs
With promises so fervent and long.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who enthralled me by the night shade,
Who stunned me as handsome and fair,
Who shook my love at first sight.

There is none like my Immortal,
The tunes of love to my foreign ode,
The loving feeling that might explode,
The living life that shan’t fade,

There is none like my Immortal,
A loving soul to my being,
A frenetic chain to my mind,
A delight to my unseen rain.

There is none like my Immortal,
A playful gift to my foreign days,
A darling light to my gloom,
An inspired joy to my poem.

There is none like my Immortal,
The ragged charm that charmed me,
The sweet heart that tempted me,
The owner of my love.

There is none like my Immortal,
The stellar voice in the winds,
The thought that shan’t fade,
The ****** love of my flesh.

There is none like my Immortal,
The splendid son of the sun,
The prince from the Slavic land,
The promise of the moon.

There is none like my Immortal,
The raw sight of the night,
The shade in warm sunlight,
The poem that sounded right.

There is none like my Immortal,
Who made my heart beat fast,
Whom I dreamed of once,
Whom I dream of once more.

There is none like my Immortal,
The king of all excited verses,
All that exceeds the Nordic youth,
All that surrounds my Eastern love.

There is none like my Immortal,
More handsome than fall foliage,
More youthful than all age,
Brighter than the Northern Light.

There is none like my Immortal,
Cleverer than chaste winters,
Smart on the rough days,
The right to my wrong.

There is none like my Immortal,
A smile on my cheek,
The star to the moon,
The snow to his own sun.

There is none like my Immortal,
Alive on such happy days,
A reason that I believed,
A love that was mine.

There is none like my Immortal,
Watery like wintry snow,
Shiny as its glow,
Brighter than tomorrow.

There is none like my Immortal,
Roseate in his smile,
Faint in his grief,
Melancholy in his words.

There is none like my Immortal,
Flushed were his cheeks,
Blood in his veins,
Mild in his songs.

There is none like my Immortal,
Confused in his own wit,
Sweet in his dreams,
Light in his silence.

There is none like my Immortal,
Godly in his godlessness,
Important in his universe,
Precious in my verses.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whiter than the last snowstorms,
Sharper than their shadows,
Freer than their spirits.

There is none like my Immortal,
Glorious in his mad ways,
Charming through the night and days,
Subtle in his silent thoughts.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose poetry entertains mine,
And who shall say about his narrative,
But that such melodies shall live?

There is none like my Immortal,
Who celebrates his youth at once,
Whom my heart loves still,
Who puts my frazzled mind at ease.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whom I love beyond my will,
Whom I love in health and ill,
Whom I love dearly still.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose night is a day of love,
Whose smell endorses my breath,
Whose absence is a living death.

There is none like my Immortal,
Whose words are a delicate touch,
Whose kiss wanted to lie on me,
Whose lateness would still charm me.

There is none like my Immortal,
There is none but an Immortal dream,
Where all is plain and not so sweet
As all that I tasted before.

There is none like my Immortal,
There is none but a sordid dream
That none of our beings shall be a poet
In a garden so sour and forgotten.

There is none like my Immortal,
That all reasons are menial and dry
That to bewitch my Immortal cry;
But my Immortal shall be here not.

There is none like my Immortal,
That there shall be no cheer as sweet
That all shall have none to love me,
As I am in love with my amber self.

There is none like my Immortal,
That there is no love so blessed
For it keeps too much unrest,
As I am singing for my poor love.

There is none like my Immortal,
That there is no love to witness,
There is no winter to wake for,
There is no tale to live like before.

At living nights! Today I saw again my Helsinki;
What a dazzling sight, bathed in its citadels of light,
At which time, didst I spend more grateful hours
That may have come and sought me after dawn.
I was dreaming fast by then, lulled by yon sleepy
rain striding down outside, with a softened cheer;
A mild one, more like kind water’s affluent soul,
Had the skies no more repelled its sight, with beer
And the remnants of their rebuked past sins,
Which once kept feeding on mere tyrannous thoughts
That the sun too emitted; but how didst such coldness
Let itself be corrupted, maintained by the amiss main
And savage terrain of the sun, and be sorely divided
once more across its terrible sphere, and wonder:
How couldst no cold remain, whilst ‘tis England;
And thus no evil couldst be new wherein,
nor regarded as trembling nor filthy anew—
In the hours that hath faded, by their uneven minutes;
And there is no honour left to revolt against its wit,
While all transforms into an unripened fatal mistake,
And there is no joy left to witness its new form,
And the remnant of love gone in its disposition,
When, one by one, the most propitious beam awakes
Offering one of its most precarious gleams,
But so shakes me by the impatience of the heat;
The poet has so to run to escape its crunching wit,
Forgetting the poem, forsaking what’s been writ;
And what is left but a sorrow from the merciful night,
The poetry too lost its favourable Knight.

Where is but the Helsinki I hath loved, about me?
The Helsinki that hath been in love with me;
And shyly flirted with me, stealing my love for days.
All my past that hath come to a halt, and with its shadow apace
I hath not one right to reclaim my solid thoughts;
I want to be the radiant snow again, mild at all paces
Haunted by ev’ry cold breath so divine, and taste
The hieroglyphics of my sad visions so succinctly;
And the philology of our violent youth so fervently.
For such sunless hauntings too are painfully severe,
And such nightmares that existed shan’t be spare,
And those shan’t I suffer myself by the pores of such dreams;
And with a radiant finger shalt I send back which see me—
The eyes of our promising heaven have now awakened,
I can see their unpierced veins through thy hands, o Helsinki!
Why is it that salubrious remembrance of such sullen hours
to give me the unwanted comfort, and unwritten silence,
I might not be worthy of thine alone, ah, but who shalt shine
During my windblown summers here, whenst the short-lived heat
Hath but been too much, and ringing through a tampered light;
I hath lost the list of odes that thou canst cast on my soul.
What an everlasting shame, to lay here alone without thee;
But who is a scattered leaf like me to complain, but to hide,
I hath lost all my steadiness to the Northern Light.

To the blue concave by yon awesome nullified cavern;
And the lifted nectar tree behind the cedar grove,
And the rippling summer river with its yellow brook
That hath been lovely to me and my wintry shine;
And the gate with such illustrious paints that illumine
Every wandering sight, righteous in whose last morals,
How happy I am, to be amidst such wondrous sighs!
How shalt I but stand about and entertain my feet,
The itchy feet that shan’t stand to the euphoria about me,
But feelest the slightest thought of thine with hesitation,
But in dreams, upset again to behold thee gone.
What a consoled hysteria I hath but made, o Helsinki!
A little further, my love, didst I tell my love silently,
Although all remains a whisper in t’is hesitant chest,
That shan’t be resistant again once it meets its fate;
A sweet fate that shan’t one steer nor disapprove,
For such a fate is neither sick nor faulty, at once,
For at such a view all shalt be put at ease, or in delight,
The moon cheers at their apparition forms and starlights.
And for my love shalt I wait at seven tonight,
An hour that is close to my Helsinki’s sweet entrance,
For hath England halted and my frightened love ceased,
And sweetened what was not sweet for my love and me,
And as bitter to my hope and hungered cleavage once.
I am, as ever, faltering in my speed like an innocent child;
I am to play from bough to bough, that I can comfort
And jump from leap to leap, as I wish to bring back alive
The thousand weeds and summer squirrels that used to
cry bitterly. They cried a lot in the open space, at night;
Oft’ didst I hear their florid steps across the unseen clearing
And voices weep through the wronged greenery, wailing.
I wouldst be good to them as I hath been good in dreams,
To make ‘em all precious darlings, and set back forth, o sweet
Waking into the night of moonlight and the Northern Lights
To comfort the scratch, and all that injures within me
And to bring justice to those who wronged in thee,
That all can sleep again amidst the high strolling distance;
I wouldst behold my love again, and beneath the confined air,
To live and love on yon gifted ege, laden with art and care.
On a ground so deep, and tunnel so rich with ice and ease,
Hath I been in too much haste, to resemble the mortal rose,
Hath I been ungrateful to my robbed love, and prose;
Hath I loved my youth in such a dizzy way, in a daze;
Hath I deserted such myths, and failed my task to praise.

They all bid me fly away and leave, but fly to thee;
Those sons of dark innocence, unvirgin bones to every sigh.
What is love to them, but a silvery, captivating moan?
What is love but two robes unchained, all too ******,
What is love but a hastened sight, a hurried moon,
What is love but not wedded, nor one to grown—
What is love but unchaste, too frenetic to love,
Not a painful comfort, nor a happy sacrifice,
Not a bough so pendulous and fair, nor a fall so weird,
Not a bizarre ecstasy; yet an ecstasy that quenches,
Not a bard, nor any of the throes in his fine poems,
Not even a wing of love itself, that often cries in bareness,
Not a humble show that fulfills, in its drop of moral rain;
Not a reminiscence of dust, nor a soap of remembrance.
Love, being a dire sight to ‘all, those cross creatures,
Love in there never held me by my hand, nor my ill chest,
All the love there—a pale pain, a bland mast of mess,
And all greasy misery is not pain, but a beheld love,
A love to see, a love that grows not in flooded snow.
All the love there—a blank sight, a tasteless life,
A love that feels not the feeble, but stainless souls!
A love that is too mean that none canst hear me,
And who guesses but such a meadow cannot see me,
Nor catch my sight by the ballade of innocuous thoughts.
O, Helsinki, I hath but such vast words in my throat,
O, Helsinki, hail us poets with the fall of ****** snow!
May us be weird, and boast to the condemned world,
May us be heat, may us bring whom a liar curse!

Every fantasy of the night stills beneath me;
Crushed within the glossy bark of yon midnight heat,
Closed by the laughter of a dominant brutal heart,
Chained by its own sinful soul, that cannot love.
And never by the night turns into uncounted falls;
Nor grows into a more promising canto in my sonnet,
For who is heat but an untold chaos, even to a baby’s ears,
There is no shelter but wanted by the gone England,
Nor a further fate to come, to be run across its river.
All English gold hath but revolted its noble thoughts,
And most of the time, ‘tis only daggers and swords
That make, and foragingly confuse its infused time;
I hath outnumbered the shrieking sins within me,
And too my art, attaching itself to me by the faltering light,
But now the most seen, the most bewitching and heartfelt.
While I hold thee to my heart, and feel there the lightest thought
That thou art the sole gathering of joys one sought
Propelling the night to stop its frozen tears, and listen;
That there is a song in such fair air, there is heaven.
And who shalt sink into the stars on the grass, but me;
Who shalt hear with my seas with love, but my poetry,
Who seals me better but my nauseous books, and lose
Who in its villainous imagination but hears me, my prose.

I shalt come back to my sanguine night in the cold,
To retreat and release back the dim saluted forms,
That oft’ fade and show themselves again in one’s poems.
Who says ‘tis not found there—a dazzling melody;
That such a beauteous parody is not from Paradise,
That a blushed cheek is ever proud and wise,
That fresh air is unseen, and honour cannot be felt;
Here, but not with the English nor American melody,
Nor couldst I be tempted by the tunes aloof in their air,
Who else than I think they are not a fair society,
Who else than I think they own not their riches,
Who else than I think a colour as which shan’t burn.
Who else there is not a tune in an idle poem;
Who else shan’t tune in, as though poems were not poetry.
Who else than turns to love me, by the slumber
o’ such lyrics, who shall be with me forever;
I want to bury myself in such charms, o mine,
To show the sun the honest hours of every love,
Though love itself canst become faulty at times!
Ah, Helsinki, all is abashed and yet not too bashful;
All that was bashful hath grown beastly, outside of us,
And so what is preaching now but a fatal lyrical sight,
And what is speech but a forgotten poem alight,
Who is Anonymous, who are they to teach them right;
Who is loneliness, who shall perish and faint with fright,
Who shall disappear, and such despair entertains the sea,

Who am I, but a doubted truth on my solitary voyage;
Who are the dusks aglow, but an obsolete sight and dish,
Who are the young scarlet tides to fade, before the buds,
Who are the dusky little lilacs to resemble the rose.
Who are the pure white tints that ice showed me,
But the hidden pinks the evils want not to see,
And the inherited northern youth, who shalt be with me.
Who shalt I be, but a silent poet to thee, o Helsinki,
Who am I to have, but such reminiscent little words of me.
To have and have not visions, the one found in my rhymes;
To writ and writ not again, as speech may haunt me,
To hear and hear not words, as thoughts come to follow,
But to read and writ again, as dreams decipher my verse.
To discharge all epics unreal, whilst they are sublime,
To emit all that remains, all visible and verbal emotions,
May I be absorbed in all my wonderings, and my dismay;
To be with the Northern Light, and the vanished world of days.