You'll never understand why I love you
The broken pieces of your heart fight to breathe
So hard that they can't take the time to stop and think
To understand all the amazing parts of you
The way you listen with every ounce of your soul,
and the way you laugh like the sound of a melody
Your strength amazes me as you prevail over obstacle after obstacle

Yet you continue to wonder why
You question how someone could find you so amazing
When you do not see the light from within yourself
But I wish that you would because it shines so bright

I've never met another soul like mine
Until now, i've met you
Broken, beat, shattered and torn apart
You still would stand out in a crowd
Though you've pieced yourself together
Your jagged thoughts and jagged words jar me

Words are not enough to describe it
Just like any other emotion
But I love you because you're strong,
Caring sensitive and understanding
The way that you laugh, and make me live up to myself
I love you  because you're the best person i've ever met
genuine in heart and in soul
The lessons you've taught me about love and regret

I love you because you're my best friend
These words seem so shallow, they lack meaning and depth
A picture paints a thousand words so here it is
A picture that hasn't quite been taken yet

Two people laying side by side on a bed
Laptops placed strategically playing music
They glance at their screens, then glance at eachother
Realizing they've been in silence they laugh
They hadn't even noticed
The comfort surrounds them as they fall into fits of laughter
About things that wouldn't matter to anyone else
The picture is taken then
As they laugh with eachother about nothing at all
It's amazing the meaning behind something so small

I know you'll ask the question again
I hope that answers your question

Why do I haunt myself with this pain?
Your every memory replays in my every day
Not the harmless, sweet and boring ones
But the ones that rear their heads like a poison tongue
Dripping acid on my brain and watching it deteriorate
To only be able to play your dark washed memory
Even six feet under you still control my every move
Echoing my motions with the words of you
Images of you disturb my sight
Thrusting me into inevitable sickness and fright
Yet I continue to push myself to remember
Driving by your house each night
Seeing your old truck parked on the side of the street
Remembering all the times right there you kissed me
I'm leading myself to my own demise
In the form of you which I'm beginning to despise
I can't rid myself of your name engrained so heavily in my brain
That can only be why I'm haunted so deeply by this pain

Go ahead and focus on her
Everything she needs is your every beckon call
I'm not important
I don't have dreams or things I want to do
She's the one that you need to pay attention too
I love her, and I know that you do too
But I ******* hate coming in last to everything else
That you need to do
The house, her, the chores, him, work
Is there even time for me anymore?
I'm suffering and you haven't even noticed
Igornance is bliss, i guess
I have a few more things I need to do
Before I get out of your hair
And you wonder why, I'm so dead set
On getting out of here

I don't know if I like showing up in your poetry
It's beautifully carved words echoing my actions
My name demeaned by "you"
Reading lines of how your worried
Laced within meaning to harsh and scared
It stops me from breathing in

Its not that I don't approve
Hell, I'm glad she makes you smile
I'm just going through more then I have in awhile
The anvil on my chest is making it hard for me to talk
And easy for me to sleep my life away
When I escape to dreams it's weight can't hurt me

That's where I was last night
My eyes closed and dozing soundly
Not ignoring your texts or cursing your name
Don't try and assign yourself the blame
For thoughts that don't exist

You're used to people running
Like this time of year they usually do
But if you would only turn around
I'm here, standing right behind you

I can't stand beside you and hold your hand
For reasons you'll never understand
But i'm here and i'm not leaving

Don't write me off so easy

The negative connotations implied to your name
Make me want to scream and run away
Hared, depression, silent rejection
Are attributes I'm not too keen to share
Oh, but the angels sing when you care

I told him the way I truly felt
And unlike every single other guy
He was finally happy for me
Maybe its because this time it wasn't
About him, or maybe because it was true

He understands how I feel about this
About me and you
How i wish that everything was different
That this hadn't happened this way
I wonder if then I'd feel okay

Kissing you drives me wild
This is the best way I've felt in awhile
These bedroom walls are cheering
Your name whispers over in my head
As I'm trying to clear my mind

You never were good at leaving me alone
Even in the darkest nights you've shone
But it's not just you i'm feeling this for
Which is where this gets confusing

I'm not sure what this means
So don't get angry with me
I'll go hide in my corner, and not tell you a thing
No matter how much you deserve to know
Because I'm afraid of the consequences
You're not him
And somehow  I don't think you'd be

Nearly as happy

You remind me of myself
Broken hearted and hoping
Looking for someone to love
Wishing that I could go back in time
To figure out what went wrong
Trying to fill the holes in my heart
With laughter, hatred, even cement
Anything that will hurt, to remind me that I feel
Anything that will remind me that pain is real

You remind me of her
Staring into the open field as the stars come out
Pouring out her every emotion
Wanting me to help her, feel more like herself
To help her find her way in life
Down the broken path that she had chosen
That took her so far away, hours- even days
When she drove away, the misted look in her eye
Told me that I had failed, I couldn't help her survive

You remind me of him
We did everything in our power not to give in
Distanced ourselves from eachother, trying to cut the ties
Living seperate lives and falling in love with other people
All because the trust was uneasy, unsure
The way he looked away when I looked him in the eye
Whenver I said goodbye, because he hated those words
His hands trembling as he took a chance to live on his own
Calling me to remind me, that I wasn't alone

You remind me of them
The distant people from my past
Good and bad, happy and sad- cliche as that is, you do
You read my every movement, my every word
Like I'm some book that needs to be figured out
Or maybe you think you've already got me down
You overthink my simple words, and underthink my sentences
My emotions seeping out like blood
I'm not the person you think I am, I'm everything but that

You remind me of me
You remind me of her
You remind me of them
You remind me of everyone but yourself these days

I don't know if it's me- or if it happens to be you
But everytime you move, I see someone else
Maybe I'm hallucinating; Or maybe I'm just going crazy
But if I told that I thought you were being you
I'd be lying- but I'll be longing for the day
You keep your own identity, and I'll be whispering

You remind me of you