I will never love again

Nothing can describe
a perfect arrangement of words
that convey a series of thoughts
through eloquent diction and syntax
I love a good poem
that fits the mood I feel so perfectly
because I could not explain it myself  
Poetry also opens windows
to see that others feel the same hurt as you
And that you're not alone ... I think that's my favorite thing about poetry

I'm not alone

My hands are shaking...

I still have doubts and I'm not perfect
I'm going to mess up

I love your room because I've never felt more at home

Thank you for realizing that you are so unworthy
of such a precious piece of gold that you left her.
But *******.
******* for making her insecure.
You were such an infectious waste that all you ever did for her
was tell her that her weight should be a certain number
******* for making her scared to go swimming
because she doesn't want anyone to see her stomach.
******* for leaving scars on her arms
that she feels obligated to wear long sleeve shirts
even when its 85 degrees outside.
******* for not allowing her to love herself
without foundation, mascara, and bronzer
because now she feels the need to get dolled up, just to take a nap.
******* for everything you ever put her through.
I hope to God I ever see you because I guarantee you don't want that to happen.
I cannot express my hatred for you, even though I've never met you.
On the other hand, thank you for making her the delicate little dandelion she is because now she is my dandelion, and I will never abuse her delicacy like you did.

This time I will not apologize
or come crawling back to you
searching for acceptance
because the only thing I should be sorry for
is letting you treat me this way.

I cannot promise you that I will mend your broken soul or
make your wildest dreams come true.
I cannot guarantee that I will always say what you want to hear.
I can promise you that I will love you to the best of my abilities.
On days where your fist feels as though it should be through the wall,
I will caress you and kiss you until your skin undoes the red.
When you feel like driving for miles, you know where my house is.
I will try my hardest to make your heart beat so fast,
your breath so quick that your entire body is a symphony
even Mozart himself would envy.
I cannot promise anything except that I will try to be your everything.
Every record breaks but I can guarantee you that I will try my hardest to mend you. Just remember I'm merely a band-aid that is trying to heal a wound and band-aids don't always work.

Nothing boils my blood quite like whenever you ignore my despondency and assume that I don't want to be bothered. I see that as you think I'm strong enough to support myself when in all actuality I need a shoulder to cry on sometimes. You think that I can hold myself together when I really just break down. You're so afraid of fighting for what you want that you reach the point where you let your illiteracy take over and just respond with "okay". When I push you away, you aren't supposed to go...

And then all of a sudden,
*I
just
broke

I DRANK SO MUCH ALCOHOL I FORGOT WHERE I WAS BUT I COULDN'T FORGET WHERE I WANTED TO BE

I've found something new
and I have no idea if he'll be a poison or an antidote.
Because when he smiles
my heart shatters in a good way
like a chick hatching out of its shell.
I have no idea where this will go
except away from my past which is the only direction
I want to see myself going.
He has a light in his eyes that even the blind can see.
He's unexplainably taunting with his
obscurity.
He has doors that are beckoning to be opened
and walls that are praying to be broken down
and he doesn't even know it.
That he is the most astonishing book just waiting to be read.
And then the notion comes that maybe he doesn't want to be read.
That his book is meant for eyes that aren't my own
and that's why he locks the doors and boards the walls
when somebody tries to break and unlock them.
when I try to break and unlock them.