Trying hard to fall asleep
With your picture engraved in my mind
Digging down deep to save myself
Yet willingly drowning in you
I am not looking for help
Just a way to die
With you lying by my side

The dark clouds never left
I cant seem to get rid of their shadows
A sunny day will burn my insides
With the scorching light of your memories
All I'm hoping for is a downpour
Till it floods and sweeps away the photograph
Hidden in the drawer of my heart
I close my eyes and see the smile it has captured
I smile right back
And wonder if I were to keep them shut forever
Maybe, just maybe I'd be back to those bright days
But now the flowers are all dead
the park doesn't smell of roses anymore
The soft luscious grass have turned to thorns
I still walk on it, bleeding
Tracing back my steps one ***** at a time
Hopelessly hoping that it could lead me back to you
But it won't and I know that
Do you??

(09/04/2014 Kathmandu, Nepal)

If every drink led to a poem
I'd write you an epic
to show how drunk I am
lost in the thought of you
But alcohol doesn't cut it anymore love
Your lips are more intoxicating
the only drug that can make me sane
Fly high enough to touch the stars
Yet grounded enough to know this is real
If only I were a *****
I'd go that extra mile for the drug in your eyes
But I'm only a coward doing cowardly things
Finishing this whisky
Hoping you were here
This time for sure I tell myself
This time for sure!!

The moon casts a spotlight
On your face I see
Everynight in my dreams
Yet I cant wait to wake up
For reality brings you
Right in front of me      
And who needs the moon
Or the stars of my fate
While you're sitting there
Glowing even brighter
More beautiful than all of them               
And when you smile  
It feels like I am seeing for the first time      
And this reality feels like heaven
Every single time

(Kathmandu, Nepal 7/14/2014)

The day you told me it was over
I should’ve taken the sharp knife of your words
and slit my throat to bleed out
every drop of blood that had you in it
and let it flow
like freedom
that my heart is begging for right now
Love had to hurt
How else would I feel the pain
of a million souls that have died
for that one love they believed in
to start ancient wars
the cries of which we hear till date
but my cries just disappeared somewhere
And time doesn't heal love
My tomorrows are all stuck in the yesterdays
the dreams that were so beautiful
I never wanted to wake up
I still dont,
Except this time I just want to sleep
Dreams shattered like a glass that fell from a thousand feet
I desperately tried to collect the pieces and put them back together
but a tiny speck of glass pierced through my skin and vanished
and my dreams are now forever incomplete
Leaving me with a sting everytime I touch that spot
Just hoping someone will help me take that glass out
But no one seems to be good enough
There has to be a way
There has to be a way!!!

(Kathmandu, Nepal 06/05/2014)

Alcohol helps
But I need you
To cure this pain  

(Kathmandu, Nepal 06/05/2014)

Everytime I give it all
To a girl
When I feel like I’ve fallen in love
And when I feel like she feels it too
I manage to drive them away
And find myself lost
In the thought of you

The cool breeze hits directly at my heart
Its so cold in there
I’m not sure if it’s alive at all
But I tell myself it’ll be ok
While listening to a beatle’s song
It’s all lies
You have managed to change my world

Music sends a shiver down my spine
I know I’m a coward
I know I cant do things right
You’d ask ‘what would you do without me?’
I didn’t think I ‘d pick a fight
With life
And now I’m losing
But knowing that you’re happy
Still keeps me alive

(Kathmandu, Nepal 05/18/2014)