Set this in motion
In this mind matter ocean
Your words are brain lotion
To lubricate my emotion
With this potion
With a notion
Of devotion
A heart in locomotion
Physical commotion
So glad to have choosen
So glad to have woven

Woven and weave
Like ivy leave
Entwine a maple tree
Under which you rest with me
Like pedals and stem
Fabrics set in hem
Gold in mold with gem
You wrap my brain stem

Molten lead fist
Self justification
Slap the face, the maker
Your bleeding heart
For your own penny thoughts
Slap the mirror, the maker
Society isn't the threat
Just your sunken shadow
and your molten, righteous, fist

Truthfully
I don't want
to talk about you
to talk about a memory

Truthfully
I'd rather not pine away at what was
or what could have been
what should have been

Truthfully
I don't care about it any more
I shouldn't care about it any more
I can't care about it any more

Truthfully
I should be creating
Creating what I had
With someone else

Truthfully
Sweet nothings and
Passionate love and
Moments of tenderness are all still there

Truthfully
They're festering in my head
No other sweet nothing was as sweet
Other nothings devoid of sweetness.

Truthfully
My love is as passionate
Without you
It doesn't make me want to save it for you any less

Truthfully
No moments came so tender
Ripe fruit of playful young adulthood
I wouldn't dare forget such moments

Truthfully
You're a muse
You're my creative high
For every single wrong and right reason

Truthfully
You're the only reason I'm up at 4am
You're the only reason I'm writing this poem
For every single peak and valley

Truthfully
I don't want to talk about any of it
That's private
But I think about all of it

Truthfully
I should have better things to do
Than pine away and think of you
Crisp Autumns alone under orange leaves

Truthfully
I know the feeling isn't mutual
I know if you did the same
You would have gone insane

Truthfully
I'd break bones to save you from a bruise
In the hopes that you would do the same
I'd never let you break a bone, you can let me bruise for you

Truthfully
It's too much
It's far too much of me to put
Into something with no means to an end

Truthfully
I love it and hate it
But a part of you is in there
It's never coming out

Truthfully
It never should
I'd hate to lose it
So I'll gladly carry it

Truthfully
I have to move forward while carrying you
Watch me as I
Collect another one like you

Truthfully
I only wanted a collection of one
For only one me to be collected
One beautiful complete us

Truthfully
Another me is up for collection
So watch her as she
Collects another one of me

Only felt a moment,
a moment in a dream.
Suckling neuro pollen
The solstace of this minute
The magnus mental stream.

I found the new oasis
I saw the new serine
I found the new oasis
I saw her in a dream

I'm a passenger here..
When was it last
Morning dew soaked my shoes
When we'd watch red skies rise
On a rocking ocean float
After nights watching stars
In our time without cars.

Now I'm a passenger here,
So I've long since feared
Something new has a hold of me
What am I supposed to be?
What replaces those nights
Of laying upon lawns
Where the only thing wrong
Was sharing headphones
And she picked a bad song.

Wheres life gonna roll
Hows it gonna hold
The dam just wants to break
But nothing was ever put at stake

Just this autumn leaf
Run down stream
By these rusted train tracks
And long coroded self esteem

Who tells us how to play these pieces
Are we making the right moves
How can I protect my queen
What is life's counter going to choose

"All I needed was the love you gave,
All I needed was another day,
You're all I ever knew
Only
You"

I've never spent more time with my thoughts
Than when I'm spending my thoughts with you

No daydream was ever more fantastic
Than when it was a night on the couch for two

I've never laid awake so much
Yet slept so comfortably
To think you could be in a dream
Can put the mind at ease

I've never felt so starved
I've never felt so secure
I've never felt so many things
Of that you know, I'm sure.

But when we're on the other side
And we can then embrace
We'll thank each others tenfold for when
Only laptops we could trace

having woken up
to finally see
there had fallen
my worlds last tree.
I didn't get up to look
what was there to see?
just this barren prairie
its getting harder to breathe...

Faded paint on the wall
Dust in my keyboard
Watch energy drip through my fingers
Into the keys
To drainpipe emotion
Through electric superhighway

Such and endless amount
Of paperwork to be done
Exam for this, test for that, sign here
Despite
Such tremendous future endeavours
And so much planning for the time ahead
All I want is a passport
To bus my way to you

Sleeping in my own lap
Phantom Slender Passenger
Watching greyscale skys
Winding wet green solitude

Look to the mountains
Unattainable misted peaks
Climb onto the unseen face
Natures peak of privacy
Sleeping in my own lap
Phantom Slender Passenger
Watching a travellers slumber
Ghost strokes of matted hair

Materialize, take a seat
Take my hand, take a nap
Take some time, Take it all
Dream of nature's privacy

Slender Passenger sleeps in my lap
Slender Passenger sleeps in my lap
Slender Passenger sleeps in my lap
Slender Passenger sleeps in my lap

I often fill my head with bile
but when I tell myself a lie
its an unnoted half truth

there was always the hashtag
that sounded to me
how you speak out my name
and to be now, not alone
cries to me, plays, like a wicked game

there's a moment of silence
for the fact there's another
but I, no sorrowing man
know chains meant be broken
life cannot be our pixilated dreams
when reality, like a child's toy
begins to tear at its seams

thats..
that...

Press your feet on concrete
Summer air it rings sweet
Press your feet on concrete
Freedom in the dead heat

Walking home on late nights
Lit up with these street lights
Counting side walk under your feet
Night birds get the cheap seat
Press your feet on concrete

Born a shade of a red
In the house of a blue
When guidance of purple
Was it's proper hue

It took dashes of orange
It had droplets of pink
With no one colour
Could it find it's sync

It dabbled in browns
It dared in the greens
It knows the spectrum
But not what the colour means

Such intensive feelings
Met half way
Under one sky
Along one shore

Such pixelated grins
Met half way
Under glass screens
Along one call

For every minute spent in
Questionably unrequited waters
My lungs filled
My head went under
Until I was set in my ways
To swim to the surface
And let such expression loose
and be it such boundless expression

For all intents and purposes
I am insane with such promise
That is your presence
Rubber room bound
In a warm embrace
Of a straight jacket
Signed, yours truly

And so we meet upon mutual feeling
On a glass horizon
That we might not dare break
Lest we see how far
We might have to fall
For one and another
Together

Your esteem's
Like the leaves
Crackling
Under footsteps
Under trees

Falling backwards
From your own "words"
Splattering
On the concrete
House of Cards

What a pity
To pity in yourself
To pity in good wealth
To pity in good health

And what a pity
You built it a city
Open Sewage
Clogs your roadways
Your gritty, ******, self loathing city.

I ache for our simple pleasures
For our tired, languid, gestures
For our vested, fruitful, leisure
Though our time and distance often measured
While both our suppressor
Let us never accept lesser
Than our treasured
Than our together

I've been told
You don't see the flaws
In people you're infatuated with
That as time goes on
You look closer
And a little deeper
And you find what you don't like

To me that is
Looking at strained glass
Some aged church window
For some long-gone saint
And intentionally looking for
A chip in the glaze
To pick apart the artistry
The artistry that
I consider someone
Who has gained my infatuation

I am irrevocably
I am without question
I am simply
Crazy about
what you are

I'd write more of endless positives
But not now
In fear of finding a negative
Or even worst
Looking for one

I'd dare not pick apart your artistry
In exchange
Don't let me be so unfortunate
As to let something fall at the seems
That has yet to be fully sewn

Stained glass girl

Clung to your white skin
Beaded at your fragile breast
Stuck to your bedsheets

Every night
We finish talking
I collapse into myself
Into my bed

A deep exasperated sigh
Turn off the light
Burst with warmth
Wordlessly content

I'll treat you like
a tailor made fortune cookie
Cause somewhere inside you
is my good fortune

Fortunate in that sometimes
Being like a body of still water
our words
are skipping stones
Rippling across our lengths
lapping the shores
of our skin
then sink slowly and settle
in our mental depths

please walk upon my gravestone
please **** me in your dreams
as i still stand here breathing
it means less than dirt to me

As my blood coursed throughout
I was fortified in your love
Rapped your knuckles on my chest
Asking to become a memory

With a three inch incision
I welcome you home
I play with your hair
You hold my viscera

Blood coursed throughout
Staring, entwined, hazel eyes
Evaluating every valve and ventricle
As you're what keeps them beating

The textual
Nourishes the soul
Within, a mind echoed  
Who repeated the words
And which washed over
The sandbed of tired eyes
And which filled lungs
With a promised eased breath
You've never more here than not
When you words are under softened skin
When you  dig your deepest
To cast my hungry bones.

A picture perfect face
Constructed of 1000 words
Of every verse written
For you to mark your place

The paper between the letters
Is the whiteness if your eye
The accent mark on hazel brown
Who's detail could never fetter

We'll hang you in a gallery
Your brazen beauty photography
Deserves appropriate passerby appraise
Film as mastery, above  the satisfactory

A picture perfect body
Covered in couplet & quatrain
In free verse & stanza
Across fruitful you embody

If a page view was a straight view
Into the eye of the mind
Its not.

I say I'm not gonna spend a dime
and waste my minds precious time
waste bated breath on some unread rhymes
act like its fine
like it's always been a victim-less crime
like I didn't feel like I was on the clothesline
hung out to dry
buts its fine
its fine
its fine
It's Fine.

But...
I am fine..
I would never say that I wasted my time.
We're in different vineyards,
We're maturing
And you make a very fine wine.
I just have the tendency to martyr myself sometimes.

You glow
Your radiated purple hue
Just touching you multiplies my atoms
Just touching your pedal is cancerous

I grew you in a chemical spill
I watered you every day
With my dappling of sunshine
I hoped to elevate your foliage

You kept reaching out
You reached for more nature
Until your sickly festered roots
Tore you in another direction

You grew towards a reactor
Beyond the need for gardening
You grew towards the processing plant
Beyond the dappling of sunshine

You keep growing and growing
But you won't grow anywhere
But further into your toxic
Pedals never face the sunshine

All you want is clean rain you say
All you want is some sun
All you do is lay there in the waste
All you do is wait for it to be done

All you do is grow mutant fruit
All you do is grow your thorns
I'm trying to live in the sunlight here
While a new gardener collects your scorn

I threw fertilizer over toxic waste
I gave it some fresh new earth
I planted roses in your place
I allowed my garden rebirth

The roses are coming in just fine
I'll expect them still next June
They grow towards sunlight every day
They're my positive giving negative prune

I hope you like to wasteland
I hope you like the sun at your back
I'll keep growing my Fresh Roses
I can't grow your Toxic Lilac

The two-thirty train
Sweeps beside the river
I spent this moment in silent meditation
So many nights
So much of Spring
So much of Summer

This train is beautiful ambient noise
accompanying every thought filling this room
a soundtrack of clarity
I thought of laying awake with you
from a distance
I thought of laying awake alone somewhere else
missing the two-thirty train

It's starting to smell like Spring
It's starting to smell like Summer
It makes me think closeness
It makes me think of distance
Its a sick sweetness
I fondly remember moments far from fond

We stayed up talking on a school night
Youthful indiscretion
Half asleep giving anything to stay up
Wanting to see inside of what you thought you were
Wanting to hush your mind
What you thought you should be but weren't

Some nights I vividly recall shallow breathing right beside me
Inside my ears
You were as much here as you were there
I fall asleep with your breath tucked away in my brain
If I close my eyes you're beside me
But unable to embraced

Some nights I wouldn't dare sleep
Busy big hands with a little screen
Clicking touch-pad letters
Giving you a thousand reasons to stick around
A thousand resolutions
A thousand promises
And my thousands hours at your disposal

It's noon the next morning
You've yet to wake
I questioned if you would
In my mind we stayed up till dawn
Nursing you with what I have at my disposal
Sweet words
Every one true

The night before, I had heard the train
I was slumped into my pillow
Observing you from a distance
Asking that anything salvage you
Asking to carry your burdens
I begin to bargin
That you stick around longer with me

I lay here
Where I laid then
The train is beautiful ambient noise
I slip away from these memories
In time to hear the train depart
Its been a year and I think about that night
You woke up
I always want to make sure you do

Self pity and questions of when and how
were to the ashen ground
under my suspended heel
in just the thought of reaching down
praying at a vigil of questions
I can't yet even hope to broach

To think what had been done
what could have been done
is only my own exercise
in futility
to make revision what we had penned
in thick, black, ink

I break the mold
I made for us
Once I've cast
My time with you
So nothing can
Touch greatness
So profoundly
With boundless
Feeling and purpose

I'll keep the time
Cast with you
I won't have to remake it
Because there's nothing
to lose

why is it that you're the one whos got more hate and resentment for me than I do for you? does that make any sense?

Two contrasting social situations

Putting central function
On the requirements of oneself
On best interests of others
Pining
Set outside perspective
Leading towards enlightenment
Lead towards an idea of truth
Festivity
Following from this
Purposeful  conveying
Purposeful connection  
Okay.

Your Unrequited Skin
From My Sovereign Starving Hand
With A Staggered Solemn Mind
Just How Much Can One Man Stand

Let's Be
Jerks
Together

Its been two years without true feeling
of the earnest gesture of friendship

Misguidedly tucked away
Far from my one true solice

While life will endeavor to push us forward
While the most savory piece of life still hangs
To my waited breath

So
You're 538 kilometres away
That's 334 miles
Walking
Is 3 miles per hour
10740 minutes
179 hours
7 Days and 11 hours

Every day I think about dropping everything
And making this trip

two years
and its gone
it hasnt even been
two weeks

Vagabond waiting
Under morning grey drizzle
They both share train tracks

In this dream-scrape
In my minds eye
It's a heartbreak
Without your sigh

We're at the blue house
With the black door
But when you're not here
Sleep is just a chore

Visit tonight, Visit tonight,
Visit tonight, Visit tonight,

Visit tonight, Visit tonight,
Visit tonight, Visit tonight,

Whats the point of lucidity
When it's not you here that's with me

In this dream-scrape
In my minds eye
Here's just pointless
Without your sigh

I hope you gaze  
Over, over breakfast
Tired mind in overcast, morning haze
It's raining in June
When your eyes attain their loving glaze

They could catch your smile
With a cardboard box, and a stick
*****, painted on your face a while
You're looking over what I wrote last night
For that smile,  I would limp every mile

This morning you begin to read my musing
English Muffin and Orange Juice
Is poetic perusing the least bit amusing?
Graft script, sweet nothings onto yourself
In conviction I made you my choosing

As I raked sand across them,
The hot coals that once marked my road ahead
I covered them just enough,
So that I couldn't see them
And I breathed a deep sigh of relief in knowing
That now I can walk on fresh grass
Satisfied in knowing
My feet weren't made for coals

Do I make you wince?
Was I a lost fawns salt lick?
Was I a never was, your life's whiskey limp?
I guess I never took your hint
I guess you thought I could take the hit
Since that's been that conversations been zip
I can't say I was always innocent
But let's hope its a two way lapse of conscience

I think about you
I think about how much I think about you
I think about how I think about how much I think about you
I think about you everywhere
And think about how I thought about you everywhere
And think about how I think about how much I think about you everywhere

You
Have
Become
The
Only
Thought

2 years ago
I was far from the man I am now
I can only really put who I am
Onto the shoulders of two

But those I felt so dearly to
To whom I'd loved
In another shade of light
Have grown even closer
To who I am
I pray
I ask this give me solace