a-n-j-e-l-i-k-a

anjelika.

that was her name.

i looked at you,
and

it didn't feel right.

i hate it.

i guess after all,
i don't really know
what love is.

after all the tears,
after all the heartbreaks,
after all the smiles that hurt my cheeks,
after multiple times where my heart skipped a beat,
after all the excitement and butterflies that i felt in my stomach,

maybe,

it was all love,
but not enough for me to understand it,

maybe,
i didn't learn it right,

or,

maybe,
you taught me wrong.

i am petrified that all of my thoughts,
they all look like you.