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A lot of planes took off

There's no place where I can be
There's no voice I can ever see
There's only a voice I can hear
There's only conditioning with fear

If I took a small amount
Of ideas that hardly ever count
And put them down for the world to see
Would my exterior cease to be?

What is it called if one cares
To love themselves beyond repair
Beyond the point of going back
Beyond being free from attack

Freedom comes from being the same
Being in groups, being not tame,
But just enough to hold your tongue.
And it will be held after you're young

And there will be some safety too
Beyond the red, into the blue
Into the group, out of the pod
Into the collection that's not pretty odd

But it is pretty! But it is nice
To not have to ask, or be told twice
And here's what lies beyond the line
There are no lies, there is only fine

There are some places you can go
To see stars or to see art shows
But how many will you miss?
What's the price of lengthy lists?

Is there no beauty in the one?
Are the stars attractive, not the sun?
It's not right, for you will know
The sun's a star, but only up close

Beauty can be found in large collections
And only some will win affections
Of those who come to pass them by
And yeah, they will, on tones so high

I'd only trust my heart to love
Perceived matter or fleeting doves
But knowing there is so much more
Is knowing only what's in store

There are many reasons to believe
Hot spots of love have been achieved
Blankets of stars spread across the earth
Friendship and love, death and birth

And like the stars spread out to dine
There is but one that really shines
This is the one your field permits
This is a simple verb: exist

And when you accept this tragic fact
That light's around, and further black
Will encompass your distant sights
Will be so wrong, and here so right

Take chance, they say, stray from the sun
And go along, become a one!
The two align, and now we see
Distance is pain, distance is free

Emotions are blind, numbness is raw
People are left, people are called
People are loved, people are hated
Don't let them become sedated

And only one crashed
First one in a while, it's something I guess, interesting duality
1.
I'm sorry for your Pain
Surely it has made your scared
And surely not all of it is fair
But know it's only in your mind
And it makes you one of our kind
I'm sorry for your Pain

I'm sorry for your Allergies
or any other problems
Disease is unjust as this life
And those that aren't undone
Can take life as quick as it comes
Or faster, it some cases
I only hope that my disease
That unto yours, erases
I'm sorry for your Allergies

I'm sorry for your Inequality
If I had one and you had two
I'd walk right up and say thank you
If you had two and I had one
It would not be, I would just run
But, Oh! I lament that it is so
For I have all, and I do know
People in our world fight to live
People in our world fail to live
Simple differences account for some
Tell me how you have come undone
Into a world in which our fear
Makes people want to not be here
I love you more, but that's not now
I cannot express, infinitely how
I'm sorry for your Inequality

I'm sorry for the Night
If ever it is dark outside
And you feel under pressure
Believe that darkness is alright
Believe that there is love in the absence of the light
You cannot see, but I love it
Darkness is who I am
Darkness is why we have some light
Darkness is what I am
And you are light, well, it is so
Always in my own eyes
Without darkness, if only light
There would be no surprise
I'm sorry for the Night

I'm sorry for your Misconceptions
Gradual pain lacking detection
Though you can't feel it, it isn't right
Behold what keeps me up at night
Money, fear, and imitation
All electronic stimulation
It's all vanity for let me say
It shouldn't really be that way
Arrows point you along the lines
To blind you from what you can find
I won't change you, you're independent
I'm sorry for your Misconception

I'm sorry for your Orders
I'm sorry since they make
You do for others, but listen now
It's surely a mistake
Collaboration makes us whole
Orders tear us apart
Doing for them will make your life
Begin to fail to start
Only do for others if they would do for you!
And if you do for others, do it also for you
For those who blindly follow feel so found, but are so lost
And acting for others all your life has an infinite cost
I'm sorry for your Orders

I'm sorry for your Violence
It's not right for us to fight
To use anger to express spite
People who hit surely don't know
What you would say, though it is so
I've heard you say it's not deserved
I've seen you ignore what you've heard
When you are hurt is my worst fear
I hope in your heart, I am near
For this message will take you through
And make a free person of you
I'm sorry for your Violence

I'm sorry for your Ego
Now, I'm glad you have some pride
We are all the same and you will know
This, if you look inside
There's no reason to feel as though
You're above or below
We are all made of dust of stars
And if you look, it shows
However, if you stand above
And you do so not out of love
I suspect that you may not see
That I am you, and you are me
I hope we come together so
We can all love and hear,
If we compromise our egos,
We shall be free of fear
I'm sorry for your Ego

I'm sorry for your Sadness
Though it does have a function
It may halt you from progressing
At an emotion junction
Oh, how I feel! How I struggle
To see you being sad
But I move on, for I do know
This sadness should be had
Sadness can never be deserved!
And at times, it's not right
But as sadness is like the dark,
Our love can be the light
So when you fall remember this,
From the bottom of the cup
As love fills up your spirit now
The water goes right up!
In this moment, please have no fear
Please fight to carry on
The sadness will be what saves you
Unless you're already gone
I'm sorry for your Sadness

Though I want you to have no pain,
Sorry, it isn't right
You now have oh, so much to gain
For let me shed some light:

2.
I'm not sorry for your Understanding
For since you clearly see
You understand our culture, here,
and you understand me
Oh, how I fight! Oh, how I seek!
I live to understand
Understanding does bring
And as it enhances my mind
It does a greater thing
It gives me my most sacred power
Which is to empathize with you
It makes it so I know what's false
And what I love, that is what's true
Understanding is all I need
To make this life complete
I look at you and understand
What it's like to walk in your feet
And what a majestic time it is!
To see someone and know
That all I've done and all they've done
Have led us here, to where we go
To meet and see each other's love
And burn each other's fear
When you help me understand you
Is truly only when I hear
I'm not sorry for your Understanding

I'm not sorry for your Sorrow
Even if regret can harm
Regret can consume your entire life
Or compromise your charm
Yet here, know this! You open up
When you apologize
And if you knew what it really was
It would be a surprise
Your sorrow is so humble
Your sorrow shapes your life
So long as sorrow teaches you
And please, without a knife
The function is for you to learn
To correct a bad fate
And now, all you need to do
Is not repeat mistakes
And please be free! For beyond that
Sorrow is but a waste
Take what the sorrow teaches you
And then, before it's too late,
Forget the pain, and do move on
It can be hard, I know
But once you love with what you've learned
The efforts of your sorrow show
I'm not sorry for your Sorrow

3.
Laterally and downward
Crazily like a pup
This is only what you expect
But it is only up

Like a madman scribbling
Or a child bored in class
Pain drags us along for a crazy ride
As if we have no mass

But listen here! Because I love
I can tell you why
Your pain just makes you beautiful!
Your pain just makes me cry

All of my new found perceptions
Enhance my life tenfold
But what you hear is born of pain!
I'm so warmed by the cold

And judge me not, but understand
I love the pained, the hurt
I love them more for their presence
Is such a wonderful work

I will plainly continue and say that your pain makes you beautiful. When I speak to my brothers and sisters who are mentally challenged, homosexual, or any other type of minority, I feel so loved and lucky to be in their presence because I know they had to fight harder to get to a point that they could look into my eyes and smile through their adversity. Pain has brought me gratitude!! Because since my pain made me isolated, so much as an acknowledgement makes me feel so loved. Pain has brought me perception!! Because I see the same gratefulness in others and it makes me understand that we all love those who share our pain. And along those lines, most importantly, pain brings us together. You should embrace your pain and wear in on your shoulder since you fought through it, you earned it, and by sharing it with others, we find what we truly have in common. Every person who shares their pain let's the struggling brothers and sisters know they are not alone! Pain is darkness, but by letting people know their pain is not abstract, we shed light unto their pain and we all love each other better and more productively.

I lost control, but just know this
Beauty is only pain
And from sharing the pain you have
Such love you have to gain!
It's another one where the letters, PAIN MOVES US, spell out sections 1 and 2, then I just had to go on a tangent since I love how much pain is beauty in my life and I hope you can love people through pain like I do because it is one of the best parts of my life
All I see are painters
Every person there
Painters with intentions
Consequential but fair

1.
When I see you paint
It's beautiful, but yet
Your path oriented format
I fear you may regret

You paint it like Picasso
You effort surely shows
But strikingly, of painting
You really do not know

Thought wonderful and unique
And more positive words
The paintings true potential
Is quite often obscured

You paint not from the heart
But solely from the mind
You paint based on the model
Of those who you do find

Every word is merely advice
Add some more red, more blue
Before you know what's going on,
Your friends have painted you

So even if you hold the brush
When you follow advice
You might become one of them
And then you won't think twice

And if you do, you'll come to find
Female name and male name
Just modeled for you, all the while
You traced them, such a shame

For it was you who was the painter
And you were also the model!
At least you have a bunch of friends
For whom you did not coddle

All is not lost, for in the end
You do look just like one of them!
And by surrendering to their fear
They are never far, and you're not weird

2.
When I try to paint myself today
I can see the results are true
But when you see me paint myself
I've made a giant out of you

I paint not for myself, but yes
It is just what I seek
I paint so I can become strong
And your advice will never tweak

Fancy myself a model too
For those who can to glance
But what's the point if beyond a moment
I don't have a second chance?

Should I have painted you instead?
Well it wouldn't have worked
The only doubt I have right now
Is do I fit, or do I irk?

I love to follow my heart instead
Of modeling after you
But what's the point if I am one
And you often have two or more?

For acting so independently
I'm reaping what I sow
If I painted myself away
How would anyone know?

Well it's not that I can really stop
I can only lament
It's great, sure, but in the end
I am here, and I vent

The road to peace is narrow
But still, it must be wide
My efforts are not private
But even still I hide

So though I love to continue
Sometimes I feel to stop
Would allow me to find others
And then I'd be on top

Your painting was obscured but now
You have a lot of friends
My painting is so clear and here
I am at my wits end

I will not stop, I love myself
I'll paint until I die
And though I feel alone today
We might eventually know why

What am I for?
I put on the right attire
To explore muddy waters
Expectation, heart on fire
Reality, quite a bother

Nothing greater than muddy waters
What I saw was what I got
No feelings that took me farther
No feeling, I am not

Tried to look down to the bottom
Only for a glance
Couldn't look beyond the surface
Couldn't give it one more chance

Peering into muddy waters
They flow, but passively
If I were lost in muddy waters
My worst would get the best of me

Walking through, enduring
My shoes still weigh me down
This excursion couldn't cure me
In fact, I could have drowned

One foot up, one takes the pain
Of withstanding my weight
My one journey through muddy waters
Was just part of my fate

They left a bad taste in my mouth
No toothbrush can address
Strength of spirit went low, south
Was meant to ease the stress

No time to think, for muddy waters
Constantly seek your gaze
If ever there was a lost soul
Muddy waters, he gave praise

******* me down, I lose control
Where would you think I am?
All of this pressure, total toll
I feel I must say, ****

Left you behind to go explore
Thankfully there is so much more
To life than what you offer me
Try as you might, but I am free

I won't look back, sorry to you
That, I can do without
I'm something pure, through and through
And now I have no doubt

Carry empathy
Cure empathy
A poem about an experience I had
Face to face, looking at me
Face to face with my enemy
Face to face with my best friend
Face to face won't you set me free?

Looking at you, no distractions
Evaluating my actions
Face to face with a liar
Face to face pure fire

Summer come ups are the worst
I still remember my first
All of the darkness inside
Summer cracks me open wide

Look at you, no regrets
Look at you, empty threats
Look, you can't even address
Look, this is internal stress

Tell me to keep that smile on
Tell me keep that heart strong
Ignore the past and pretend
Now you can't even pretend

Standing here face to face
Look at me, pure disgrace
Look at me, no fear
I don't know how I got here

What's up with being admired?
Is it me or are you tired
Pretending like they all know
How you could never say no

Lookin at me and my speech
Thinking I'm going to teach
Running away from my past
Slowing down, summer's my mass

Summer is still my confession
Time to address my obsession
Time to address my mistakes
Time to obsess my mistakes

Tired of being alone
I love myself, hold the phone
Where did myself even go?
I'm nowhere near this flow

I see myself through my people
I see myself through the reader
I see myself through expression
Mirror just causes depression

Thinking about those times
Thinking about those tries
Attempts at being fulfilled

Thought about running away
Thought about leaving someday
You told me you had nothing

You don't know what you've got
You haven't suffered a lot
You've suffered a little bit
You haven't gone through it

What's up, can't you hear it
What's up, broken spirit
Noises of promising future
It's just become unclear

I've got several promises
That I'll have a great life
I just hope these witnesses
Will help me learn to fight

I don't know what I can do
But try to come fight you
Mirror shards breaking apart
Broken mirror, reflective heart

Heart, time to just shut up
You've got love but no luck
Your choices were all wrong
Express yourself through song

That's about all you can do
Other than try to be true
And then fall into a trap
And then excessively snap

You snap in the wrong direction
What do you call perfection?
Will you leave me alone?
I know you've heard that tone

Now it's coming from me
Your leader is not free
Because you set me up
Because you messed me up

Mirror set me on fire
Mirror calls me a liar
Back to day one
Back under the gun

Hope we make it back
Who really built that track
I loved myself before
But it's becoming a chore
Sad mood, sad poem. Summertime sadness is here
Hello, York Suburban! It’s great to be here today, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be...speaking...than right here...with all of my awesome classmates. I can’t believe we made it here, you know, this was a really great experience, going through school and everything. Back in the day, before our generation became obsessed with social media and electronic stimulation, I used to have a past-time that I greatly enjoyed. I don’t practice this...practice, much anymore, but back when I was young, I used to watch cable tv a lot. I know, I’m really dating myself here. When I say dating myself, I mean, we’ve been dating for a little over 18 years, myself and I, that is. Anyway, watching tv, yes, and when I used to watch tv, I saw what our media portrays as a usual high school life. And much like everything the media portrays, I later found out that high school is nothing like how it is portrayed. I used to think it would be a bunch of young adults standing around, talking about each other, with each other, waiting a few tenths of a second for the studio audience to start laughing, that part was definitely only on tv. (If no laughs, move on. If laughs, say, maybe it wasn’t only on tv). Anyway, yeah, they were all standing around talking on tv, so young, gullible me, I thought  I would just stand around and talk for four years. In order to prepare for this activity known as high school, I proceeded to wear what I thought everyone wanted me to wear, I only expressed myself when I thought I should, not when I wanted to. And for my first year, that was about all I did, more or less. I was scared at first, I was defensive and I loved my life back then, but my life was motivated by fear way too much. My whole life changed after that like the sun changes the sky when it rises. There was a light that came into my life, or should I say, the light came from within myself. I had revelations about my motivations, my beliefs, and how I wanted to live my life. Once I started being who I wanted to be and making choices that were good for me and were the choices I wanted, I started to love myself. During my time at York Suburban, thanks to all of the amazing people I interacted with, I learned to love my life more and more every day. I learned that if I continued to express myself, I would increasingly love myself as well. Expressing yourself is so important because it doesn’t just build your confidence, it builds you! When you express yourself, you learn what you like and don’t like about yourself, and that’s what happened to me. Even though a lot of my high school career was unfortunately spent alone, or feeling isolated in some way or another, I really loved watching other people express themselves and have fun. I always wanted everyone to express themselves more because I learned that I love watching people express themselves, it’s the most beautiful behavior I’ve ever seen and that will never change. I learned so much from every person I had the privilege of interacting with, so thanks everyone, you know, that was really great. I love you all! And that won’t ever change. But I can’t promise I’ll remember all of your names, and I don’t expect you to remember many either. Kids these days, you know, always overstimulated by media and smart phones haha. But when you leave, really take yourself with you! Take yourself and hold on to what you love within yourself. That’s enough, you don’t have to hold on to any memories here. Siddhartha Gautama (also known as Buddha) once said, “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” It’s sad to leave this all behind, but leave it all behind. It’s ok to be happy and remember the good times, but I love you all, I want you to succeed! Don’t just remember memories, create memories! Keep changing yourself, changing people around you, and changing the world until your body runs out of energy! That’s all I ask. I’d like to thank all of the employees here at York Suburban High School for giving our class a healthy and constructive environment, full of excellent role models, and good life lessons. And thanks to my family too, especially my brother Max, he’s really cool. Also, check out my Hello Poetry account, Nick Gati ;) haha. I had to plug at least one electronic media account, this is our generation! And before I leave, I would like to recite a rap that I wrote.

Class of 2015
Let me say what I mean
I’ve been inside this machine
For four years and I’ve seen
People loving and hating
People giving and taking
People in boots shaking
People with hearts breaking
I’m like Kendrick Lamar without the beats or the fame
I’ve got rhyme and time, I’ve got pride and shame
It took me too long to make my life mine
It took me too long, but I’m right on time
I love being weird here before you all
I love it so much, but let me take this call
“Hello? I am currently giving a speech
Before I go to IUP to learn how to teach.
I’ve gotta speak these bars to try to communicate
How all we need is love, we don’t need any hate
So let me hang up, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
MY WHOLE LIFE has been consumed by too much sorrow
It was hard, at times, to navigate my way
I had times where I’d go days not knowing what to say
Until I found all the answers written in my mind
Until I changed myself and became one of a kind
Thank you all for letting me express myself
And express yourself too, leave your pride on the shelf
Love people, love life, and remember these words,
Life is about listening and letting others know that they’re heard
How can it be
that you're talking to me
but we're so far apart?

What do you see
when you have to look at me?
Does it ever break your heart?

What is this?
Who am I?
And what do you need?

Just decide it all
Everything is your call
And my loyalty is free

I don't know how
To separate what you want
From what I need

I'm just a flail
Controlled by your scale
Of emotions granted to me

What is wrong?
Are you gone?
Forever here am I

Don't try to help
Just let me wish you well
Leave me here to cry

I'm so tired
Of having to admire
Every heart-arrow fire victim

Spirit, set me free
Loving everyone and me
Is a blessing and a curse

Just give me some time
Stop making love a crime
It's hurting me so much

Every fun time
Every experience that was mine
Doesn't belong to me

They're all yours
I'm down on all fours
Searching for what you need

What's my foe?
Do you know?
Or is it just me?
In a sad mood. This is in the styling of the song, My Last Song to Jenny, by the Avett Brothers
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