Just one message from you, and suddenly 5 years of friendship are rendered virtually meaningless.
*Maybe we just weren't friends in the first place?

Don't pick up that knife,
Don't you cut your arm.
Don't try to take your life,
Don't do yourself harm.

I cared about you all along.
I thought you were okay,
Apparently I was wrong,
But it doesn't have to be this way.

I beg you, put that away,
It's not the right thing to do.
I'd know, and for you I pray
That you will make it through.

I've known you for so long,
And I will for many years to come.
So put that knife where it belongs,
And please stop being so glum.

Please just stop this now.
Please don't follow my path.
Please don't make my mistakes.
*Please put that knife away.

What genius waits until 5 minutes after all my work is completed for the night and THEN sets off the fire alarm? D:<

Start with a bowl of laziness
And some lack of motivation
Mix in with some carelessness
And a ton of procrastination.

Add just a pinch of dumb
And just one dash of cheap
Prepare for what may come
With a profound lack of sleep.

Keep cold for a month
And don’t forget some mean
For now your recipe is done
And will shatter all your dreams.

There's no such thing as a fresh start. You have one chance, only. ***** it up and you can never fix it.

It figures that when I finally realize the full extent of what I've done,
You're so far away that by the time I see you again it'll be far too late.

When I first met you
You took my breath away
Now it's all I can do
To let you just stay.

I thought you really cared,
And it broke my heart that you lied,
But life was never exactly fair,
And you don't know how much I've cried.

I know you don't really care,
It's quite obvious, you see,
But I've fallen into disrepair,
This empty shell that is me.

Could you help me out?
One favor, for old times' sake?
And tell me, without a doubt,
Our friendship wasn't fake?

Yes, I'm fine. I'm all better now!
I wish...
Oh I'm sorry I let that slip, didn't I? Don't worry, I'm fine that didn't mean anything ;)

No matter how many times I plead for help, you always ignore me.

No matter how many times I beg you to stop, you keep hurting me.

And no matter how many times I vouch for you, you never care about me.

Alone in mind, not in presence,
The boy cannot do this.
He has gone on for as long as he could, but the knife isn't enough anymore. No amount of physical pain can distract him from his bleeding heart and howling soul.
He types an email instead of writing it, because his hands shake too hard.
He writes a different one for each person and hits send. Nobody will know until it's too late: the clock reads 3:16 AM, and he's hundreds of miles away. He does handwrite one thing, however: he leaves it on the counter in an envelope, the front of which reads "Mom".

He exits his bedroom, and takes a last look at his surroundings, kisses his sleeping 6 year old sister on the head one last time, and walks to the balcony.
He remembers, two years ago, when she fell.
Fitting, yet ironic, he thinks. that he would leave the same way. He looks at the stars, whispers "Goodbye," and leaps. The cool night air rushes around him momentarily, then-nothing.
.
..
"Hello?" he calls into the nothingness. No answer.
He calls again, with the same result.
Slowly, the painful reality of his situation dawns on him, with horrifying clarity:
This is the afterlife, and it is worse than the real world was.
But it's too late. He can't take it back, and he is doomed to eternal  loneliness and complete nothingness.
*Forever.

.
.
.
It's lonely here.
The silence is deafening, really.
.
.
.
Can you hear the wind?
Or am I just imagining it?
.
.
...come back...
.
.
.
Is anyone there?
Can anyone hear me?
.
.
…

I'm back.
To the gates of hell.
Now, maybe that's being dramatic, but she did fall here.
The center of my life.
The person who completed me.
The person I loved (still do, actually).
She left my life six months later.
To think that in the 4 days preceding the fall, so many memories were created.
Happy ones.
They come flooding back to me now.

What if we took our favorite lines from poems, one line from each poem (one poem from each follower/every liked poem/favorite poems/your own poems/etc), and constructed a coherent poem from the lines? Probably a bad idea, but food for thought.

But in nights like these, when the sun's heat is gone from the air,
These are the times when I tend to fall into complete despair.

It is moments such as a sunrise, the beginning of a new day,
That I hope that things will not always have to be this way.

I have to say, thank you
for the valuable lesson you taught
That I can't trust you too,
That this was all for naught.

I thought you truly cared,
But I was completely wrong,
and my trust won't be repaired,
Although you knew all along.

You used me for self-gain
Of that there is no doubt
And you've caused me much pain,
In our friendship throughout.

*In closing,
The day I trust you again
Will be the day I have sold my soul.

You.
When I think of you, I think of my happiest memories, as they were all with you, but they never do you justice;
How you could put a smile on my face no matter how down I was, or how you could, with a single kiss, light fireworks in my brain.
How I loved you, and still do.
You brought out the best in me, made me a good person.
You taught me that I should reach out more when I needed help, instead of bottling up (which I still do sometimes). You taught me that there's more to life than games and school.
I love you. Please come back.

How you set my world on fire....
I miss you.
Unlike some people, who love because they need,
I need you because I love you.

And nothing will ever change that.

Hello.
I am your enemy, your "victim."
The ice to your fire, the paper to your scissors,
the blue to your orange.

The point is, I hate you, in case you haven't noticed.
So leave me alone.

Seriously, I cannot take your harsh words anymore.
Go bully someone else.
...****.

I am fragile.
My empty, worthless soul, my very essence,
Could be shattered with a few simple words.

My twisted and cracked heart
Could be pulverized
With ONE simple word.

And my shakily reconstructed self-esteem
Doesn't even need words to be destroyed.
All it needs is one look in the mirror.

Deep in the meadow
Under the willow
A bed of grass,
A soft green pillow
Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes
And when they open again, the sun will rise.
Here it's safe, here it's warm.
Here the daisies guard you from every harm
Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true
Here is the place where I love you.

Deep in the meadow, hidden far away
A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray
Forget your woes and let your troubles lay
And when again it's morning, they'll wash away.
Here it's safe, here it's warm.
Here the daisies guard you from every harm
Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true
Here is the place where I love you.

Lonely

Alone

I miss school

I miss my friends

I miss everything

I'm so tired...of it all.

Of life.

It's been 2 days and already I would do many things to be back in school.

*This will be a long summer

Happy birthday mom
You're always there for me
And I always complain about you
But I have no right to.

You've been nothing but selfless
Nothing but kind
Patient and understanding, but I?
Rude and demeaning.

Thank you so much, and I wish you

A very  happy  birthday.

Goodbye
I'll miss you, friends.
Goodbye
I'll miss you, computers.
Goodbye
I'll miss you, Hello Poetry.
Goodbye*
I'll miss you all. Every last one of you.

The school year draws to a close
And I find myself sad that it's over
Not because this was a good year
But because being around friends kept me sane

*I wonder what will happen, then...

I try to smile
I really do,
But it's hard if you've lost a best friend (or two)

I try to be happy,
But can't you see?
It's hard if you've lost a best friend (or three)

I try not to cry,
And I've said this before,
But it's hard if you've lost a best friend (or four)

I try not to hate myself
But as you can derive,
It's hard if you've lost a best friend (or five)

I try to trust you,
But you can predict,
It's hard if you've lost a best friend (or six)

I don't care about my feelings anymore.


*All I care about is your happiness

I would try everything
If not for the fact that it's too late.
So I won't bother
It would just be a waste of time.

Sometimes, being your friend
Demands a sacrifice
My happiness.
You have to point out
How everything is wrong
Can't you just
LET ME BE HAPPY?!
I'M HAPPY ALMOST NEVER
LET ME ENJOY IT FOR ONCE!

In my head
Creativity runs undeterred
Fireworks of words explode
Entire universes collide
But this is all in my head.
Because to get
From the brain
to the hand
to the pen
to the paper
Some things are missed.
Because poetry is a game of telephone
And things are lost in translation.

I am struggling to get the words out
They are starting to feel empty, and forced

Poetry shouldn't be like that.

Poetry should be as natural as breathing
As flowing as air currents

It should pour out with power, with purpose
Unrefined, but beautiful
Not in spite of it, but because of it.

And that is getting difficult to do.

So I looked up the word hope in the dictionary today...

hope |hōp|
A feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.

Then I decided to read the definition for expectation.

expectation |ˌekspekˈtā sh ən|
A strong belief that something will occur, or will be lived up to.

Then I decided to read the definition for lived.

lived |liv'd|
To have been alive at a specified point in the past.

Then I decided to read the definition for past.

past |past|
The time or a period of time before the moment of speaking or writing.

Then I decided to read the definition for moment.

moment |ˈmōmənt|
An exact point in time.

Then I decided to read the definition for exact.

exact |igˈzakt|
Not approximated in any way; precise.

Now, I don't know if my brain meant to do this or not,
But the first letter of every word I looked up spells *"Help me."

I'm taking a chance
I'm leaving my shell today

*But will it be worth it?

He was on the edge of the world, his world.
Pondering what awaited him...
A single lone tear rolled down his face
He trembled for a moment
Then quietly, he began to write.
In his neatest handwriting, because nobody could read it otherwise
When he was finished, he sealed up the envelope, put it on the table,
and looked in a mirror, at the thing he hated the very most staring back at him
he stared into his own eyes, seeing through them into his own bleeding, screaming soul
Into his cracked, shriveled, and blackened heart
And into his own lost self, that had cried out for help so many times
But when he had help, he lied and lied, but couldn't say why
He had made so many mistakes, he wanted to correct them.
But he was about to make the biggest mistake of them all.
He silently left the house he had called home for 13 years.
The boy decided to walk slowly; for it would be the last time he would do so.

He heard the whispers of the night
through the hearing aids he had been teased far too many times about,
And saw the stars twinkle in the sky
through the eyes that had watered up more times than he could count,
and he breathed the cool summer air
through the mouth that had released sobs, shaky breaths, and cries,
And more tear tracks replaced the first.
He finished his walk, and found a place nobody would find him at
He smiled, a twisted, cracked, and broken smile
And left this world forever.

Little did he know
That when his parents woke up
And saw the envelope on the table
They read it, and tears poured down their face
And his little innocent sister would ask her parents
"Mommy, Daddy, why are you crying?"
"Where's my brother?"
And her parents would try to answer her,
but only more cries would come out.
And everyone, even his bullies,
Would be shocked that one so happy
Could've done such a thing.
And then they would blame themselves.
His friends would become more and more depressed
Some of them taking their own lives too
What he thought would fix his mistakes
Would be the biggest mistake of them all.

Lower
Lower
Lower
It never stops
It never ceases
It always keeps pulling you down
There is no escape
No break, however brief
Admirably persistent
In its desire to take
All that you know and love
And turn it into all you knew and *loved.

This is the worst possible time
For all this added stress.

There was literally no other way, was there?
This HAD to happen now.

I couldn't stay
I so very wanted to
But I literally couldn't
And I'm sorry

I couldn't stay
I so very wanted to
But I literally couldn't
And I'm sorry

I can't stop smiling
And it's just for today
But I'm happy
and I'd trade almost anything to stay that way.

When I see myself in a mirror
I want to carve knives into my body
When I hear my miserable voice
I want to rip out my vocal cords
And when I think about myself
I wish I was never born.

Well this is new

You've broken my trust

You hurt me in ways I really didn't think possible
You've shaken my already fragile frame and broken it, shattered it, when I needed you most.

But then again

I was a naïve fool to think this wouldn't happen to me eventually.

I was a naïve fool to think that I could be so trusting.

I was a naïve fool to open up the way I did

I was a naïve fool to think I it wouldn't happen to me at all.

I was a naïve fool to think that I could be trusting at all.

And I was a naïve fool to open up at all.

Thank you for teaching me that lesson.

I always thought it would be funny
If for a day I stopped hiding my scars
I could pretend to be the Joker
and say, "You wanna know how I got these scars?"
And when people look upset I could say "Why so serious?"

I wonder....will I crack like an egg?
or shatter like glass?
Maybe I'll snap like a twig instead
Or maybe it's none of these
Maybe I'll *make it through.

Fire, pain and flashes
Screams, cries and moans
Begs for help, begs for mercy
Walls where air should be
Air where walls should be

I'd listen to you
But the voices in my head tell me not to.

There's no such thing as "worst."
It can ALWAYS get worse.

*But that doesn't mean it will.

I love the rain.
Nobody can tell you've been crying.

She doesn't understand
How he loves her....
How she's one of the reasons why he gets up in the morning
How she can put a smile on his face
She doesn't realize how special she is
How his face lights up when he sees hers
And how dazzled he is when she smiles....

He can only hope
That she, someday, may have feelings for him too.