nobody warns you about the first boy who tells you he wants to marry you.

nobody warns you about the tangible shift in the universe when he parts his lips to smile.

nobody warns you about the poetry he'll write you or how your knees will weaken or the melancholy hidden between the layers of his laughter.

nobody warns you that miles will morph into lightyears and you will curse the ocean for being the only thing that keeps his fingers from resting between yours.

nobody warns you about the day his sweater doesn't smell like him anymore.

nobody warns you that human hands are incapable of holding a person together.

nobody warns you that sometimes love is not enough, no matter how much you wish it was.

nobody warns you about the crippling nostalgia that renders you breathless.

nobody warns you about the nights when silence screams for your blood.

nobody warns you about the crater that forms in your chest in the middle of the night when he doesn't answer.

nobody warns you about how it's going to feel when he tells you he's in love with someone else.

nobody warns you that forever is a lie.

- m.f.

I stopped writing for awhile
For I had started to forget
Forget what it was like to
Be left alone again.

After you had left I was abandoned
With my own thoughts I had to write
A love as pure as you is something I cannot find over night.

And for some time I was there
Stuck in desperation for a little more
Left to try and repair my body
My life stuck in a repetitious bore.

But slowly I pulled myself out
Finding serenity through friends
Peace of mind came quickly, easier
I found that my thoughts of you came to an end.

I participated, I went out
I let others hold me as you once did
And slowly I found life less lonesome
To open up and be happy again.

But once more you came back knocking
With hopes to drag me in
And in my foolish glee, I accepted
And I went spiraling down again.

I got caught up in speaking with you
Then forgot that it would soon end
For when you got what you had wanted
I was left alone to fend.

I'm quick to jump to conclusions:
Maybe I could get you back again
Or I could always turn and find it easiest
To stay laughing with my friends.

But we both know that I won't choose the latter
I'm weak and foolish to try to crawl back
But that never matters
*For I'm addicted to your attention
And I slip down at your suspension.

I read that he lost a suitcase full of manuscripts on a
train and that they never were recovered.
I can't match the agony of this
but the other night I wrote a 3-page poem
upon this computer
and through my lack of diligence and
practice
and by playing around with commands
on the menu
I somehow managed to erase the poem
forever.
believe me, such a thing is difficult to do
even for a novice
but I somehow managed to do
it.

now I don't think this 3-pager was immor-
tal
but there were some crazy wild lines,
now gone forever.
it bothers more than a touch, it's some-
thing like knocking over a good bottle of
wine.

and writing about it hardly makes a good
poem.
still, I thought somehow you'd like to
know?

if not, at least you've read this far
and there could be better work
down the line.

let's hope so, for your sake
and
mine.

Under the orange
street lights
it's 3am

Longing to find him,
she skulks alone
in the dark

And as London sleeps
her cries go unheard
by all but one

Throughout her adult life
all of the land shaded.
Feverless islands where the
aged couple sleep.
Never once have I hosted a party. Not once have I
told you, I have
been hurt.

The promise
of tonight
stirs within

Let it
soon
begin