I hate small talk
maybe thats why I'm so bad at it
because when you cupped my hand
in the warmth of yours I could
feel the small talk coming
I could feel an ending nearing
and because of you I hate small talk
now when people try to make conversation
with someone like me I tend to shy away
from a form of talk that takes me into
the times were I lost you
so I hate small talk and how I compare
it to all those times I loved you
when I have to force myself a simple
hello at someone far away I remember
those times a hello was aimed at me
from the tip of your tongue that
travelled out of your mouth and into mine
small talk is not for a girl like me
who lost so much when she
realized she couldn't speak up
and lost someone like you

define cute for me  
I asked with a smile tugged at the sides  
well it's clearly you  
you easily replied  
I contemplated if I even was cute  
because all my life I had been called  
beautiful in the words of a boy's mouth  
but cute meant that I was underneath the  
spectrum of what beautiful meant  
I was someone that was just cute  
fuzzy and warm that held a boy's stare
but never his interests  
I wanted to be beautiful to you  
like I was to them  
the boys who I had mistaken for men  
but to you I was the definition of cute  
and beautiful was meant for  
women who completed men

have you ever felt like your
going to cry for hours on end
realizing that you were not enough
the tears feel like an ocean that a
sailboat could sail across on with
no worries to wonder through
because your tears are not ugly
but streams to glide through
they're stained with black
is that maybe mascara
that covers your face thats
already tear stained
and once you cannot cry anymore
it feels like a drought within you
that not even the sailboat can sail through
if theres no more water for us to push through
how ever would we get across to our
tears that lead to acceptance of the past
please don't cry anymore
dont reminisce of a past
that your tears can not last
through anymore pain of the one
you called your lover who
suddenly broke you

you fell involve with the wrong person
Helplessly and hopelessly
you can fall in love with anybody
but that doesn't mean they're the someone
for your body that aches for another soul to
share your dreams with and compare your
Achievements with
when your heart falls apart don't worry
Because theres countless loves out
there waiting for somebody like you
theres a heartbeat ready to sing with yours
ready to hear the i love you tainted in their
ears forever being binned by you
just because you feel involve with
someone who doesn't appreciate you
Doesn't mean the one out there isn't
waiting for you to join their heart
to love them with you whole body
you fell in love with the wrong person
and i get that it upsets you
but my dear one day you'll meet
the person who fulfills you
with all their love and care
that they could ever bring you

im braless in my white t-shirt
you can see all of me
even down to my rigid ****** sticking
out so apparently
i see their shocked faces as they take in
the sight of me
am i shocking enough that my ******* aren't covered up
do i shake the very floor you stand on with my indecency
I dont cover my exposed ******* or the ****** that
pokes its head out to see its surroundings
do i make these grown men uncomfortable
with my body that has curves over her dimes
these men that catcall on a daily are scared
of a women with no bra to cover a simple ******
oh how men rattle my brain with their selected
intake on a woman’s body
how they take us apart with their knives
Cut us apart like we are there for their dissection
im just a woman letting my body be free from
a mens gaze that they think can haunt me
me being braless isn't a step to regain
Freedom from their sleepy gazes
but it’s a step in being a woman
with a bra constraining mens faces

I always wondered why
I wasn't good enough for the likes of you
maybe it was because your mom said
my depression was too much mixed in with you
maybe its because all your friends hated me
and I had no clue
but I always wondered why I wasn't good enough for you
not even a little not even a bit
I searched for the answer everywhere I went
and when I finally enrolled back into college
I thought you'd see me in a new light
love me for who I was but that still
wasn't enough for the likes of you
but I've finally come to realize
you're just a silly boy with dreams far bigger than me
and I'm just a girl waiting to touch the stars
even though I'm not good enough for such a silly boy
I found out I'm always good enough for the likes of me

my sister said my glass were far too
big for such a tiny head
she's only thirteen so I can't really
blame her rude behavior
even though that comment didn't sting
it did leave a footprint in my memory
you see when you live to twenty
all the care of the worlds seem
so small and stupid
which is why it didn't really bother me
because when she grows to be twenty
she too will see that glasses being too
big for such a tiny head will not
be another worry to her list
of bigger things to worry on about
I laughed at her attempt to make a
joke at my expense because I'm
twenty and I'm living a life
thats only made for me