your room is so weird
he whispered in the dead silence
I stared at him through the night filled darkness
that surrounded us two not quite lovers
But rather strangers who shared the same bed
i whispered back what in a silence that was paused
he didn't answer but rather slept
Slept on the idea of us just being there together
But not really together just existing in another
presence
was my room really weird with no theme
that matched the gray walls dipped with
Radom wall decor
was my room the definition of me
a cluttered mess with no compass to guide me
was he right that maybe my room was the very
subject of my absolute being
he slept so peacefully after insulting me
disgusted i tugged the blanket over my face
hiding the ugly room that i had painted
that i had decorated to describe me in every way
but my room was weird so what exactly did that make me

be the orpheus to my eurydice
Love me with your songs that reach a wood nymph
dance ballets around my head with poems strung along
my heartstring that play your ballads
marry me in the woods that gather hush tone songs of
a happily ever after with you my dear orpheus
but when our happy ending doesn't quite reach
a tender heart beat do not fret
just search  the underworld for another chance
to find a joyous love with me
do not turn your head my beloved
for even if you cannot hear my soft footprints
ill always be behind you like a musical note
strung on your harp full of radiant strings
if you do not find love where you seek
you always have me Orpheus to where
our hearts meet in the tender green forest
where two lovers kiss quietly
beloved orpheus i will always be the song
to your beat and the poem to your heart
never stop looking for me in those places
where our connected hearts meet

For younger me
I’d tell you to not stop counting the stars
because your dreams are not just silly daydreams
i’d tell you not to trace constellations with your
Fingertips delicately as you resemble your life anew
i’d tell you that not reaching for the sky is something
you should never do
i’d tell you that mistakes happen
that life has a way to play games that you may not want
to partake in but remember your life has value
I'd tell you to be strong and loving to yourself
and always remember that your body is a forsaken place
for only you to pray too
i’d tell you that boys don't matter and *** is not taboo
but maybe so young it just isn't the right time for you
i’d tell you that you're going to fall a lot
but taking the leaps to that fall is the greatest achievement of all
You'll constantly fail but failure leads to determination to follow
the dreams you've put behind you
oh my young self live freely
because one day you'll be trapped in a cage filled with self hate
if you do not love yourself so young like you should do
my young self love and prosper on
live your dreams beyond you
Remember that life is short and once you turn twenty
life starts over and soon ill find myself to a young you

different people
same bodies
they all collide like a kaleidoscope
of the same colors and shapes
They're all different though
but terrifyingly the same
they share the same personality
that oozes out of their horrid bodies
they mock and cry at pain that they've
cause to my dismay
They're always different people
but connected to the same entity
trapped in cages they cry at the
Steel bars that lock their bodies
to shams with no escape
Are they really that different from
the body they once shared many
Years ago that beat my heart
Relentlessly
im tired of seeing the same people
sewed into different bodies that
taunt me the same way as before
just people trying to escape a body
They've never fought for

have you ever seen the burnt leaves
crumble away when fall falls to its knees
when winter starts to sing
the trees start to wither and their flowers
Start to lose their delicate petals that
cushioned them in a safe place of denial
the sky starts to get gray with
no sun in sight
Only the moon kissing the stars softly to sleep
have you ever noticed that i don't get much
time to watch the leaves change to Burgundy
Im still stuck in my petal just to wither away

I love your poetry
but did you see the pen that glistened
that ink felt blood dripped openly
on paper that seemed so endless
You write everything so clearly
but in my mind it shattered everywhere
you should be a poet
but poetry isn't me
I write until dusk kisses dawn sweetly
I stay up nights endless
I stutter for words that seem together perfectly
I love you poetry
but my poetry is never me

don’t drift apart from me
rip me in shreds as you leave
grasping my neck as you yell
at a sky thats already turned to dusk
don’t leave me in the back of your mind
where memories tend to sink
to never regain to the surface as you
swallow them back like a pill with water
don’t let these moments go away from us
they keep us attached like a rope on my neck
thats when to snap when i jump off the ledge
Don’t let me go when you feel like you've had enough
i’m not ready to separate from a being like you
who’s caused me pain and love and happiness
don’t let these tender thoughts that define
both me and you drown in the sea you've composed
with a memory ready to fleet into the dark sea
and as always away from these tender thoughts
that guide you away from me