Sometimes I wish I was likeable and found it easier to forgive and to be honest sometimes I truly feel alone and scared to interact with people and when I speak sometimes I feel like I say the wrong things but they're honest words that come from hurt and rejection
When I was younger I felt jealous of those who had a better home life than me and maybe in my loneliness I did have a tendency to push my family away. Sometimes I regret it yeah but Ive gotten use to being alone that sharing my space and to be open has become hard for me
I don't seek to be understood and I frankly don't want revenge but deep down it's the ugly side of me that lives there.
Fighting back just makes everything worse and it gets worse when you don't seek social acceptance anymore...people are just disgusting to me...
It's the honest truth
I see the frustration in their eyes but I can't help myself on shadowing them
I know and I'm aware I have a lot to work on in therapy....but at least I'm aware on what I'm doing...
It seeth me like the flames in hell... And I can't help it
I want to watch the world burn
Sometimes I want to set the whole world on fire
Being forgotten unpriotize...who can do that to a child
Then expect them to be a healthy adult
I'm sorry for being so angry
Aloof and bitter
But at least I'm aware enough to move away when all I wanna do is destroy the world
People disgust me
So call me a ***** all u want but that won't ever bring u closer to understanding what it feels to raise ur own self and ontop of that raise another person...
I will not apologize for feeling angry
Feeling disgusted by the adults that were supposed to protect me
And no I will never bring another human being into this world when all I have know is isolation
So I suggest that you leave me alone while I try figure myself out cuz there's nothing more dangerous than a woman scorn....
And that frustration u feel when I won't let u near me is the same one I felt when I wasn't being heard....ignored or forgotten
I only shadow what I know
....
And yeah I hope it hurt....
I have found people who have finally understood me
Listened and cleaned my wounds....
I hope that hurts u too...
I hope seeing me happy with people that care,valued me and took me in hurts
I am finally happy and I hope you will come to terms with that
I am never coming back and you will never have access
You will never hurt me again....
I have relationships to heal...I have better things to do than entertained immature alcoholics and drug addicts
I will never entertain you...
I have bigger things and people I need to make amends with and your not one of them
So leave me alone