The only thing that is presently on my mind,
Is the thought of me now, baffled and blind...

What if I just pulled the trigger now,
Would people wonder why, when, where, how?
Would my father then understand me,
When I'm so blissfully set free?

My poor, little brain,
Has gone completely insane.
I have yet to buy a prom dress,
In which I'm clueless, I confess.
I have an ankle sprain,
Soley feeling inside pain.
I have my second SAT to take,
Please help me, for God's Sakes!
Plus an ACT I'm taking soon,
I feel like such a loon.
I became diagnosed with a mental disorder,
For a life as good as hell, I'm surely on the border.
I'm alone as of now,
And i sit and wonder how.
I had to quit lifeguard training,
All the bad luck I was gaining.
People view me as shy,
So I just simply cry.
I'm afraid to show my true personality,
Because of the significant lack of mentality.
I have yet to take my road test,
I'm not too far behind the rest.
My father hates me,
From built up stress and aggrivation, you see.
I am myself and nothing more,
I am wounded internally from one slammed door.

Pluck my eyes out,
I  have just found out,
My summer is ruined,
I have a sprained ankle,
A medical condition,
More acne,
Anxiety,
I'm tired as a newborn baby....

Just stop trying to be someone who you're not,
Because evidently, it hurts a lot.
Stop the staring and wishing to be someone that's not you,
All the unwanted thoughts passing through.
A head filled with endless wants and needs,
Desire for illusions, my helpless heart bleeds.
Stop all the complaining and fuss,
With all the fights, who’s to trust?
You are not inferior to any of thee,
But through those faded pupils, can you see?
Do you notice the world around you?
Or are you too oblivious, so lost, so blue?
Just get over your interrogating feelings of doubt,
Strive beyond your abilities; go all out.
Know what to expect from your actions,
Superior or inferior, the omnipotent fraction.
Simply love yourself and only you,
Forget the haters with nothing better to do.
Handle life's challenges in a way a unified manner,
Instead of debating who is tanner.
Live for the moment and appreciate all the love,
You have always received near and above.
Stop fooling with your mind,
Sobbing away till clearly blind.
Let yourself know we all think differently through everything,
That without you, it'd be lifeless; all the personality you bring.
We all have the power to try,
maybe then our minds won't die.
Try something riveting and new,
Something you are proud to call you.
Stop trying to love thee,
A fool, a coward you would be.
Love yourself above all,
But care for others and proudly stand tall.
Yes, I said love and not hate,
break past the open gate.
Express yourself for what you want,
Easing of tensions, by detente.
Stop all the excuses and lying,
The unreal attitude you have, the fake crying.
Trapped in portieres,
All the feelings of distrust, how unfair!
So let’s close the portieres of guilt,
And cover up with a nice, warm quilt.
A good night’s rest will do the trick,
For a poor one, who's psychologically sick.
It will help alleviate the pain,
To feel some comfort, once again.
Stop hurting yourself and feeling down,
That ashamed, guilty, timid frown.
You will learn to love,
And give those unjust feelings a great shove.
Go have fun and smile wide,
Because no matter what, when, where, why...
Everybody is on your side.

There is no other boy like you,
Such brilliance and warmth you hold,
There is no other human,
I'd rather unfold.
My heart cries out for your love,
From so close, yet so far away,
I imagine you and I connected as one,
Loving you deeper and more, every day.
I sit and ponder about your ways,
How fortunate I am to have met you,
How assiduous and affectionate you truly are,
How my every wish miraculously came true.
I stand atop a hill with you,
Embracing you with loving arms,
I have so much gratitude for a boy like you,
With such unique quality and many charms.
Your great sense of humor,
Never ceases to amaze me,
Laughing so hard and for so long,
Always expressing freely.
We've had some inside jokes,
For which I'd rather not name names,
But all were quite interesting,
New and cute little games.
I can never forget the time we first met,
You smashed that tennis ball right at my behind,
And a note that asked, "Will you go out with me?"
I would never decline.
I've always loved your personality,
And so much more,
The endless days that hurt inside,
Are the best days we've yet to explore.
I've wanted to tell you for so long,
That I honestly love you so much,
And when we're apart,
We will always keep in touch.
You help my heart to keep on beating,
I've found true love; there's no doubt,
For you are the only boy,
I constantly dream about.
So I now stand atop a hill with the one I love,
With sparkling eyes and a luminous smile,
I'll always have you with me,
And make every day worth while.

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone,
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”