I lent you dog-earred Bukowski,
                           you returned it unread.

Tomorrow I will write the worlds best poem,
                                         one with rhythm, beauty and form.

It will change how everyone views the world,
                                  around my pinky finger they'll all be curled.

Tomorrow I will paint a masterpiece,
                              with genius hidden beneath colors rich and deep.

It will change my soul,
                                          make me feel whole.

Tomorrow I will be the best,
                                                   at everything I test.

But tonight
                    I will just write.

Do not go to college
       until you are actually ready.

It hits you, in the middle of a late night re-run.
And all of the sudden..
You listen to the scheduled bickering in pure optimism.

Your eyes grow heavy,
                   stories grow ridiculous and lengthly.

The scrubbed lady appears less frequent,
                         the mechanized beeps become dulled.

The scheduled hit of temporary relief
                            your head falls back into medicated sleep.

How do you begin the day
                        when the night never came to an end?

I Can't help it,
             I know I'm self destructive and horribly putrid.

I accept who I am,
               glorifying the monster like no-one ever did.

I know you are growing to hate me,
                            but honestly; I disembodied you to keep my self free.


To me you are a ******* ***** who doesn't see the right of way
                                                             ­  and it is in your hate for me I play.

For the pain you cause,
                      you will see returned to you in the intensification of all your self-flaws.

Waste the day away,
                   with music and lung decay.
And when the mind begins to stray, it is in the shadows that it plays.

And when night begins to fall,
                    waste away the nights with stories and cheap alcohol.

Until you finally collapse in your bed,
                               and all is quiet within your head.