You made me stop believing
in who I was.
You slapped my *** with your shower caddy--
blamed it on invisibility
with a smirk and a wink in my direction.
I saw your reflection
in the hall mirror from the corner of my eye.
Your body was full and half-clothed,
your imagination molding me
as I stood there innocent
trying to view myself
the way you saw me.
It was a dark shadow you cast.
I bathed in your deception.
I saw my own reflection--
in my bedroom mirror at midnight
with your hands on the nape of my neck
and your fingers cradling my skull,
flattening my spine into
what you would fit into your figure.
There was your lips on my ear and I heard
a backwards whisper of a promise you swore,
you swore was true.
and didn't like who I saw.
A departing kiss,
Frostbiting my lips.
Happiness infused with sorrow,
Coldness with a piercing burn,
Your kiss permeates through me,
With a lingering taste of love .
I try to speak,
But can't utter a word.
Preserving the moment with silence,
So that I can admire your beauty instead.
In these moments that we kiss goodbye,
Gets me in a withdrawal.
Because a love given can't be retrieved,
And so my heart follows as we depart.
With tears of frustration,
That can't even measure the weight of love,
But at that moment,
I would feel the essence of love.
we both skipped school
just to be together not as for fun but for love
we ran, we smiled ,we held hads and kissed but I could see the
sadness within her which she kept as a secret
but I never gave up for our love
I kept our time happy and fun.
The day after another
as we enjoy our time together,
we hold hands and kiss at the end, but
I see that she wants to tell me something but she
leaves with a tear she hides and not dears to tell
as if it might hurt me.
Then the sad days come,
she wont skip school with me any more
but I find out she is absent every few days with a boy
named Luke, she hardly speaks to me like I'm invisible
and when I lead her home she say no word and barges
through me without a kiss or even a goodbye.
The next day,
I walk and I walk thinking and thinking
was it me that upset her was it I
who hurt her feelings and........
there I see what's wrong she standing there in the hall holding
hands with the boy named Luke, was I dreaming,
did she spend the absent days with that young foul
I'm breathing hard, thinking to much, sweating with pain then
I stopped breathing by the pain of my heart
I fell to my dramatic death...
Love, we must part now: do not let it be
Calamitious and bitter. In the past
There has been too much moonlight and self-pity:
Let us have done with it: for now at last
Never has sun more boldly paced the sky,
Never were hearts more eager to be free,
To kick down worlds, lash forests; you and I
No longer hold them; we are husks, that see
The grain going forward to a different use.
There is regret. Always, there is regret.
But it is better that our lives unloose,
As two tall ships, wind-mastered, wet with light,
Break from an estuary with their courses set,
And waving part, and waving drop from sight.
Trembling fingers hold
This brimming cup.
Coffee staring blankly.
Bitter taste invades.
My tongue, no longer
Tastes. Scent of bliss
Lingers in my veins.
I drink too soon, cup
Upends, its contents
Spilled in my lap. Reflected
My soul and my heart.
Also published at Dagmay: Literary Journal of the Davao Writers Guild
— The End —