i have experienced darkness before

some darkness felt peaceful, that i can fall asleep
some darkness felt painful, that i nearly cut my bedsheets through my nails
some darkness felt sorrowful, that i feel like i have an infinite amount of tears i could produce
some darkness felt wrong, that i had been stuck in it for so long i forgot what is right
some darkness felt suffocating, that i barely remembered how to breathe

but the darkness that i'm most scared of
is the darkness of emptiness.
this darkness felt hollow,
i don't feel alive yet i'm moving
i don't feel anything, yet i'm strongly feeling everything
every agony, pain, joy, i feel them all strongly
yet i feel nothing at all
i feel like i want to scream, but there would be no sounds from within
i'm a ghost, in a human's body
and i don't know how long i'd be hollow.

this might be my silent call for help.

if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them how you made me feel secure and insecure at the same time
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that you're different from everyone else in this world
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that it was hard, that it was painful
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that i see myself in you in a way nobody can
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that you are me when you fully accept your emotions
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that it's the first time everything made sense
if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that no one else is for me, except you

if they ask me what i feel,
i will tell them that i love you,
in a way i never have loved before