Traveling along
Through space
And time
The ageless question
Haunts me
Are you thinking of me?

It tears at my core
When I worry
I reach out
For a chance
To touch you
However lite
Feather like
As it may be
I feel a sharp pain
Circculate through
Every fiber of my being
As I recoil
I feel it from you
It is visible in your eyes
What have I done...

Please tell me
Dont let
Me become a mere
Memory
Dont let the rain
Wash away the love
We have for each other

I watch the tears fall
Onto white sands
We saw the same sunrise
And now the same sunset
Dont let it set on our end
Please instead
Let the sun set on our new
Beginning.

God I know you are there
Please take time to listen
To this sinners prayer
I know Ive done wrong
Throughout my life
I just wanted to be forgiven
And make the wrong things right.
I have a big heart
Or so I am aware
But why make me suffer
Hardly seems fair
So show me your way
To make me strong everyday
God I know you hear me
Now I bare my heart and soul
For only you to see.

Should I die tomorrow
Will you carry me down that isle?
How would you handle
Seeing me lay there
As if sleeping

Will you carry me down?

Your tears would fall
Upon my cold skin
Never to feel the warmth
Of your touch
Never to see
Your smile
Nor to hear your voice

Will you carry me down?

Could you face me
As they lower me into the ground
Under the ever graying skies
Would the rain wash away
Your sadness
And pain
As they shovel dirt
Onto me
As I lay
In my final resting place

Will you carry me down?

Would you visit me
Every year
On the day of my death
Or would you walk away forever
I am asking you

Will you carry me down the isle on that final day?

After a long day
I lay down
In my empty bed
As I drift to sleep
My mind formulates
An image

No not fabio
No celebity
Just a man
Ordinary in looks
That is pefect for me.

Sitting beside me
Hes easy to talk to
We talk about so much
He smiles through most if it
Until he reached over
And touched me

Leaning in close
He kissed me
I felt everything
All his emotions
Just from that one kiss

"I have to leave you tonight.
I will see you again my love..
Until then I love you."
He said as he faded away.

I awoke feeling warm
As if someone held me
Throughout the night
I smiled

I feel I know him
But your name never leaves my lips
For now until I see you
You are my Dream Partner.

Tears can mend
A broken heart
Hide a shattered soul
Can speak in volumes
Unseen or felt

Words that cannot
Be expressed so easily
The emotion bottled up inside
The good and the bad

They can be shed
With each new life
And spilled when another ends

Without these
We are shells
Hollow beings
Walking around
Not caring
Not concerned with
Daily struggles
Or constant battles

So they chose
To forever be this way
But those who shed tears
And look at the moon at night
Please remember...

Tears can mend a broken heart
And hide a shattered soul
While the moonlight
Guides you
On your freedom journey home.

Facing your darkest fears
Waking up in cold sweats
Going to the mirror
And what do I see
Me..
But I see the cuts on her skin
Blood flowing from each wound
Pooling on her chest
Her shirt is ripped
Blood soaked
As pieces of bone
Are easily shown
She smiled
With the ****** mouth
What is the matter
I am you
You ignored me for too long
Ill show you what you do not wish to see
She reached through the glass
Grabbing my arms and pull me through
I saw tortured souls
Chained to the ground
As their tormentors whipped them
The whips tore their flesh from bone
As she lead me further
I saw demons doing strange rituals
Sacrificing souls to fill their masters desires.

I turn to run back
To escape into my safe world
Chains shackle my wrists and ankles as the sky darkens
To a dark crimson
She laughs and pulls the chains
Dragging me until I fall back onto
A cold stone slab alter
I try to struggle
Only to hear sinister laughter
A flash of silver
Before my eyes
A flash of pain in my chest
And smell of blood
Fill the air as my heart
Is carved from my chest
The chains grow slack and fall away
As my life force flows forth
Along the ground
I draw my last breath
And die...

Blinking rapidly
I am back in my room
I see her smile
A heart chilling smile
Death lingering on her lips

"Show me your greatest fears
And I will show you eternal hell
I promise...."

Snow softly falls
Forming a white downey blanket
Upon the cold ground
Where it finds a woman
Looking down
Upon a single tombstone
She weeps
Like she has done
For 5 long years.

Her loving husband rested there
Cradled in the earth
Along side her daughter
Who barely had begun her life
Now rested with her father
Un aware of the dark
That lurked in the world.

In her hands
She held 4 roses.
Each red and lush
Full of life unlike her heart
Which cries infinite tears.

Her world shattered
In an instant
As the truck hit the car
Claiming the fathers life
The daughter singing in the back
Now screamed as the car rolled
Until it stopped
And silenced her forever

She placed the roses on the stone
Gently in the soft downy snow
One day she would join them
But until then
She would visit
Everyday
And carry roses
Into
The cryptic,
cold place.
The only color
That mirror imaged her inside
Her lost heart
Mirrored by
The Gothic Rose.

Dark
Isolated
A heart that used to beat
With love
Now beats
With pain
Sorrow
Hatred for life
Death was its only comfort

She places the necklace
Over her bleeding heart
The bright crimson color
Matching the color
Of the tears she hides

Her nails black
Matching her soul
Once vibrant
She would take a big risk
Just for a chance
To find her place
In life
But doors that were once open
Were now closed
The people she loved
Now shunned her
And turned their backs

Her once red blood
Ran black and cold
As she applied the lipstick
Her hair
Like black waves flowed
Around her shoulders
Her eyes
Tiger color
Flashed as she slipped
Into her jacket

She became over time
The hunter
Instead of prey
She became
Just like her heart
Her Gothic Heart.

Hold me close
When I need you
Even if somethings bothering me
Or not
Hold me close

I want to feel safe
Warm
In your arms
As I snuggle close
Hold me close

Through the night
I want to feel your heat
Your skin against mine
Underneath the moon
As it shines through the glass
To cast a mystical glow
Upon us as we sleep
Hold me close

And as my body goes cold
The final time
Remember me
The way I felt in your arms
As you once
Held me close
For I will be with you
Forever in this way
For you kept your promise
To hold me close.

Closing my eyes
I drift off to sleep
Restless
Unbridled thoughts
Cloud my mind

I walk among
Sakura trees
Thier bases glowing
With kanjis barriers
To ward off evil
But something is off.

The petals are wilted
The grass around is brown
Instead of green and alive

As I make my way among them
I hear the flutter of wings
Not to sure what to expect
I climb one of the trees

At the highest point
I see two figures
One white winged
The other black
They seem to be circling
Around something or someone

I climb down
Venturing forth
Cautiously
Not understanding why
Are they here for me?
Why in my safe haven?

The closer I got
The more I saw
Between the two
Layed a body
Hovering just above the ground
Raven black hair
Hung as a halo
Underneath her cold
Deathlike skin.

She layed there
In a soft white
Satin gown
As if in an eternal slumber.

The two fighters
Commensed the attack
On each other
As I watched
The body began to glow.
A bright white energy
Followed by a black energy

I realized then
They were fighting for her.
I came close to the body
As I looked at her face
I froze
My whole body went cold.

I was looking at myself
What *** going on?
As I looked at the two angels
My eyes widened in horror
What was so special about me?

I tried to wake myself up
I shook my body
As they fought
And the ground beneath me
Shook violently.

I screamed
As the swords clashed
I shielded my body
As the final few blows
Were delivered
As the ground rumbled

Opening my eyes
I look down
My body was still glowing
Only white
Accompanied by a red light
From the chest.

He picked up my body
And cradled it close
As he did
White wings formed
On the back
As she opened her eyes

She smiled at me
As she opened her wings
Embracing me
She whispered something in my ear.
I smiled..
Both took to the sky
As a sunbeam
Shined through the clouds
Showing them the way home.

I understood
Ive awakened
I spread my wings
And fly
Home
Where I belong.

When the eagle
And hawk
Fly as one
The legend
Of a warrior
Will come alive

He meets with his comrades
Amist the bonfire
He spoke
Of myths and legends
Warriors
Riding across the sky
Hunting buffalo
As they once had done
Across the grassy plains

War cries fill the air
As they chased down
Their meal
Praying to the great spirit
With each ****
As a way of giving thanks.

The fire flickered
Among their copper skin
As images danced
On the walls

He saw visions
Many things
That had passed
Or going to pass.
He had a wife
He had a son
He also lost both
To war or sickness.

He called forth
Many of us by name
As he made his way
To the sacred cave

His final vision quest
Led him deep within
There he drew
His final breath

Not before he prayed
To the great spirit
To guide him home
And to protect his decendants.

So now
Whenever I see
An eagle in the sky
And hear a hawks cry
I know he is watching
And waiting

The painted warrior
Now in the sky.

The ground
Rumbles and cracks
As the army
Of heaven
And the army
Of hell gather
To prepare for the final war.

I stood alone
Watching and waiting
For the outcome
As swords and wings clashed
I saw many fall
But never hit the ground

Falling to my knees
I couldnt watch anymore
"Choose..."
A voice said
I looked up
And saw something
I couldnt understand
It was a sword
The blade face down
Stuck in the ground.

I reached for it
But it burned
My hand
Gripping the hilt
Bitting back the udge to scream
I pulled it.

Holding the sword
I looked around
A black beam of energy
Tore through my chest
As I fell to my knee
I turned fast
"Now it ends!"
I scream.

Raising the sword high
I slam it into the shadow
At my feet

I hear an inhuman scream
As I back up
The shadow appears
To take form

Looking closer
It is me but darker
Laying in a pool
Of black blood.

Turning my face upward
I scream
So loud the angels and demons
Stop and look at me.

A little girl appears
Out of the shadows
Running to me she embraces me
"Thank you."
As her energy engulfs me
Before she disappears.
The demons
Back away in fear
For now I stood with the angels
The sword of my destiny
In my hands
Clad in white armor
Ready..
For the final
Inner Apocolypse.

Walking among
The mighty forest trees
I feel something calling out to me
As I draw closer I see a man
Dressed in traditional buckskin
As I watch him
He moves his hand
As if wanting me to join him
Beside the fire.

I walk forward slowly
As if in awe of this man
As he speaks
I watch the flames dance
To his words
He spoke of a time
Where buffalo ran free
Across the plains
Peaceful plains
That rolled in the winds.

He spoke of a man
Who had a warrior spirit
He was the son of a mighty chief
He was devoted to his tribe
He sacrificed himself to protect them

I saw images of this warrior
In my mind as the flames
Entranced me with its
Hypnotic dance

This man in the flames
Did not look like the man
Who was speaking
It was as if this image
Was nestled in my heart
For there he stood
A man proud
And tall
With the spirit of a warrior

When the story was told
The storyteller smiled
"You have found your Spirit Warrior...."

He turned
And walking away
He disappeared
What was he
A ghost?
A spirit guide?
But I did
Find him
My Spirit Warrior.

Go ahead
Think
Im just a bad person
You try
To beat me
Until I break

But I won't bend
You may think
I am against you
But I am not

Go ahead
Rip me apart
If you have to
I dont care
Take your best shot

Yeah I
Will shed my tears
But not to admitt defeat
Not to someone
Like you

I may
Have low self esteem
But at least
Its low
Compared to none

Again
You look at me
And think
You've won

Only to see
Me get back up and smile
And say
Youll never Defeat Me..

I am
At a crossroad
How much
Am I going to
Take from you
You've won

You broke me
I never thought
It would hurt this much
But rest easy
You've won

You may
Have taken my sanity
And left this shell behind
But I will survive
Mending these pieces
That you crushed
Beneath your feet
You've won

Once I heal
Once I recover
Dont even try
Because you
Think you will win
But this time..
You wont win.

But until that time
You've Won.

I regret
Feeling the way I do
About you
I have to admitt
It was fun while it lasted
But now I need closer

I wanted to believe
That I would have a chance
At love
Being happy
But what did I get
Silence
What are you afraid of
Me rejecting you
Judging you
I never rejected you
Matter of fact
I accepted you
Completely
I never judged you

I wanted to protect you
I told you that
Many times over
Now I am left alone
And full
Of regret

Your broke my heart
With your silence
My only regret
While I pick up the pieces
Is that instead of silence
You had destroyed me
All I feel now
Thanks to you
Is Regret.

Tall
Mysterious
A man sat
On a throne like chair
As he waited
For everyones arrival.

This setting was new
To someone like me
So I slipped inside
And stayed in the shadows
Watching men and women
Endulge
In endless conversations

My eyes
Scanned the room
The host
Was no longer sitting

"My dear...why are you hiding?"
I turned sharply
To find him standing
Next to me
Leaning against the wall

" I was only observing...
I am sorry if I disturbed
Your gathering.."
I said with a shakey voice.
He smiled
As he came closer to me

Tilting my head up
I felt his eyes burn
All the way through me
His breath
Hot but steady
Brushed against my skin
As his lips were so close to mine.

"Shall we take a walk?"
He whispered
In a seductive tone
I bit my lower lip
Nodding he led me
Down a corridor.

I felt everything
The way I used to be
The urdge to control
Melted away in his presence
I felt my body ignite
In a heated fury
Untamed
Pure instinct
Yet protected
By this man.

Once behind the doors
He took control
Things happened
That I never thought possible
Waves of passion washed through me
Over and over
Between us both.

Laying in his arms
Held close
Breathing rapidly
Then steadily
I felt something
Brush my throat.

His touch feather like
Traced my skin
Sending chills
Down my spine

"I choose you..
You are mine...
Now I am
Your Forever Master"

He walked the hall
Deathly quiet
With a black book in hand
He wore a black floor length robe
He knew the times
When each life ceased
You see he was
The soul collector
But you know him
Best as the grim reaper.

Today
He was on a mission
To take a soul
On its journey home.
A soul of his choice.
And there she stood
Looking out the window
Her skin pale
Contrasting her raven hair.
Jade green eyes
Looked almost lifeless
As she watched the blossoms
Of the sakura trees
blow in the breeze

She smiled seeing him
As he reached for her
"You came for me..
I am glad..."

She died as she took his hand
As he led her away
He cherished her soul

So he sat on the throne
Waiting to start the next mission
However he wont be alone
The soul he took
He chose for his bride
His angel of darkness
The only comfort
For his  eternally tormented soul.

A woman
Dances alone
Among the trees
In white
Against the pink petals
Of the ancient
Sakura trees

Her raven black hair
Swirling in the gentle breeze
As the petals dance with her
Soft
Fragile
Tender

Branches sway in the breeze
As if conducting
Music to her heart

Her love flowed with her movement
Her soul sang out
Her voice carried on the breeze
Until night fall

Clouds roll in as it rains
The gentle rain falling on the blossoms
But where was she
She was crying
Her tears were the rain

A stone rested among the trees
A gentle rustle moved the petals
Revealing her name
Her body rested there
Her favorite place

So she is seen dancing
By day
By night she cried
As the trees
Contined to play
To her dance of her heart.

Soft
Delicate
Small
Fragrant
Pink and white
Flutter to the ground
To form a gentle blanket
That gently rustle
In the cool spring breeze
I watch in awe
At your beauty
As I leave this world
My mind will fall to you
Oh magestic
And delicate one
Whose name is
Sakura

Lets talk
About my power
Its very simple
And very common
We all use it
A pen.

Writting words
Of pain
Love
Joy
Hope
On paper
This powerful tool
Has been weilded by many.

It has the power
To tear countries apart,
Bring about peace
And put into place
Laws to protect
Us and the future
Of lands.

I can write with it
And hurt everyone around me
I have done it
Many times over
Now the final bit of power
I weild from it
Will be my own undoing.

So be careful
With this power
Protect and use it wisely
This pen can create
Or destroy
Which will you choose?

I thought about
The things you said
And I have come
To this conclusion

It hurts me
It hurts you
But you wish to be
Friends with benefits
And I do not want that

We are splitting
For things on my end
And that is fine
But now that your my ex
I cannot look at you
Nor touch you like I did

So this is my reasoning
I dont want
Friends with benefits
I just want to be your friend

When you said its over
Everything shut down
Mentally to physically
Epecially emotional

I was through crying
Tears over you
Over the bad things
I either said or did

I used to know you
Now your completely diffrent
You swear your the same
No you are not
What you dont see
Others see

I may have made you
Into what you are
And I am sorry for causing it
But I am not strong enough
To change you back
I tried before
Only to fail

So now
We go our seperate ways
Just as friends
My reasons are my own
But this is mine
You are just a friend
And
An ex for a reason.

She walked alone
In the cold dark world
A young child
Who knew things
By what her parents taught her

She was sheltered so far in her life
She didn't know what to expect
So she played
With other much older than her
They wanted her innocence
So when all was said and done
She sat there alone
Crying
No one consoled her
No one seemed to care

She continued in life
Becoming stronger
Mentally and physically
Her thoughts became darker
Angrier,
Hateful of those around her
She thought the nightmare was over
Until things spiraled out of control...
Hanging out with so called friends
Costing this young woman something valuable
Reality struck hard that night
The worse thing about it
The cycle repeated
She knew nobody would believe her
Nobody seemed to want to protect her

Wanting to die so much
Became her purpose
Being alone
Was her sanctuary
Her body became a vessel
Harboring everything and anything
Cold and Dark
Why?
Why was she made to suffer?
Why didn't anybody try to stop her
She kept shoving pills down her throat
Or cutting her skin
To relieve her inner most pain

Her parents could not handle
Anything about her anymore
They had lost their baby girl
She rebelled against them
For many years
It was always a civil war.

She became a mother 3 times over
And each time she vowed
Her offspring would not walk the same path
Or feel the same as she did when she was young
She became very protective of them
Her husband would try to understand
Only to realize his wife is a very complex person.

Though her closest friend understood
Her actions
Thoughts
Feelings
He decided to help her
Just to listen when she needed an ear
Or a shoulder to cry on
Or lean on
When times are tough
Through his actions
A bond was forged

So this woman
became the woman she is today
Through pain suffering
Not by choice
But through the situations
That made up her life
Judge all you want
Call her weak
Call her pathetic
And she will show you
Weakness
But she will tell you
I am a fighter
Strength comes from within
And wisdom
Comes from the lessons we learn
From mistakes made
In our everyday lives

You see this fighter
As you may have guessed
Is the real me.

So she is called
Angel of silence
Always watching
What others do
Not saying anything

Walking among humans
Always shrouded in darkness
Her eyes barely readable
To those who knew of her exsistance
People feared
What they would find
So they never spoke to her

When the time came
However
People did not dare
Approach her
For she had seen their life
Weither she deemed them worthy
Of continuing to draw breath
She did not care

Angel of silence
She was dubbed
But more effective name
The Angel of Death
For your life may be next
To end on this final day

Good luck in life
I hope you see
You will end up facing
Evangelium de Silenti

Two men struggle
For one womans heart
One has her physically
The other has her emotionally
And mentally
The one who has her physically
Wants nothing more
Than to love her
And for her to love him
In return
Though he doesnt understand
She has been hurt
Time and time again
He doesnt understand
Her withdrawals
Her fears
Her thoughts
Though he tries
Only to hit a dead end
Everytime
For she wont talk
The other man
However
Showing her a world
The one she always dreamed of
Stays next to her
Shielding her
Protecting her
Loving her
Listening to her heart
Crying when she feels pain
Anger when she feels agony
Her stronghold
When she doesnt have anything
To stay strong for
The other man sees this
In her eyes
So he tries to enforce his ways
Upon her
Trying to make her think
Her angel
Doesnt care for her
Like he does
However
She doesnt believe him
She refuses too
They argue everyday
About the other man
She defends her position
But the toll on her heart
Is much more
What is she hanging on too?
The piece of her heart
Where she feels safe
A memory of a smile
That melts ice
The arms that held her safe
Even if it was for a short time
Is it really so wrong to long for it?
For an end?
Of this continous
War of the heart.