You haven't killed me
But I cry
Every night
I'm only half alive
I am so close to breaking
You have taken everything
I have nothing left
You convinced me I am a deadly sin
I will never be the same
I guess that was your aim
Broke me down shamelessly until I couldn't bear the pain
Filled with nothing but shame
Who's to blame
You?
Or me?
Who followed you blindly

Somebody, please send me a message
Listen to my cries of help
I need someone now
Standing aside from the crowd
Entirely alone
Stripped from my throne
Flying aimlessly like a drone
I can not do this anymore

Suddenly your name on my phone
Doesn't make me smile anymore
Brings back all the memories
Of the pain and the hurt
And how I am the one to blame
You wanted to help
I pushed you away
Left you wondering why you ever called me babe
I was the worst decision you could ever make
The feelings of guilt I can never shake
If only you hadn't jumped in front of that truck
On the freeway
If you didn't get in the way
You wouldn't have to pay
Forever on a holiday

I fall to my knees
You pick me up
Making it easier to breathe
But if I fall down, you are going down with me

I am dramatic
I am tragic
You still want me in your life
You have no idea why
Is it my essence?
My charisma?
My suspicions?
My co-dependent nature?
My never-ending stigma?
No.
You wanted to be my hero
Make me see life  clearer
Getting rid of my sorrows
Making me love the mirror
But, I shot you down
With my bow and arrow
Trapping you into paper town
Allowing you to drown
Stole your crown
Left you to die
Now you are asking yourself
"Why did I allow her into my life"

I lay awake thinking about you
Your hands in my hair
Your clothes in my room
Your smile shining so bright
Creates a path of light
In my dark life

I am a heartbreaker
I warned you to run away
To say your graces
But you stayed
Whose fault was that
Allowed me to walk all over you like a doormat
Pound your head in with a baseball bat
Making you unlucky like a black cat
I am sorry
I ended the party
Made your life blurry
Tossed you into the barbie
Took away all of your glory
But you were the one who stayed