It feels so real,
His touch, his countenance
The thoughts whirring in my mind,
Profound feelings echoing through my spine
Trying to decipher intentions,
Never understanding because my analyzing mind is relentless
Imbuing meaning where there is none
Writing songs inspired by dreams
But when I awake
I realize, none of it is real

The golden moon hangs against the backdrop of a navy sky
I look up to the stars and whisper endless wishes
I believe in God, but sometimes I wonder if He hears me
Hears the plea of a hungry heart
Seeking God's love to fill this endless void

I sit at my window sill,
And close my eyes
I imagine the sky through my 5 year old self's eyes
Jesus said if we're not like the children, we won't enter the kingdom of heaven
So, now I'm trying my best
To get back to that child like state
I know God can heal all the wounds
That come with growing

Right now my dreams are only real in my sleep,
But soon they will be my reality.

Not everyone is a ******...

Not everyone is a ******...

Not everyone is a ******...

D on't assume

O thers intentions

U nless you want to get hurt, you

C an't have everyone like you and treat you well

H owever, you can set boundaries, so not

E veryone can clean their ***** shoes off on your heart.

Step One: Rules do not apply to you. Neither does popular opinion.

Step Two: A type of fearless courage is your badge of honor

Step Three: Get used to the fact that you will not fit in with the majority of the people you meet

Step Four: Cleanse yourself of all previous programming and learn to think for yourself

Step Five: Live

Step Six: Be free

Step Seven: Let go of anything that imposes on your freedom

Step Seven: Live modestly and wisely. Don't attempt to make a public spectacle of yourself by adopting mainstream "rebel" trends like spiky multi colored hair. Rebellion isn't merely changing your appearance, it's a radical internal shift in which you decide to go in the opposite direction of mindless sheeple

Step Eight: Practice love and compassion. Shut your mouth once in awhile and listen. This way you can understand other people and their unique viewpoints

Step Nine: Believe in yourself. Because no one else will believe in you as much as you need

Step Ten: Live as an agent for God and your life of righteous rebellion will be for a good cause. You don't want to be a rebel without a cause now ;)

The sun glitters upon the coy pond
The wind whips softly through the trees
I find myself in places
That people fail to see
I'm overlooked and taken for granted
Like these secret destinations that I explore
Sitting at diner tables in the dark
My coffee is still hot,
Steam rolling up
I cup my frigid hands around the mug,
I lay my face down on the diner table,
Steely cold

I saw myself in a reflection on a passing train,
A deranged face with a malevolent smile in the background
My reflected face a hologram on top of his
NYC subways where the real rats are the people

The hill, it seemed, the hill
Where a tree gave shade
A quiet shade
In the midst of a raucous fair
Cotton candy and corn dog smells wafting in the air
Hormonal teenagers,
Strange setting,
Running in circles, searching, but not finding
Goodbye, deep within his eyes
The song by Smash Mouth as I rode away on my bike,
Smiling

Dark, decomposing chambers
Deep within my being
Going through seasons of death and rebirth
Death and rebirth,
I try to stop the cycle,
I just want to be alive
But the cycle is a wave
Within the ever changing river,
Never set on one course

I had a map once,
I had a plan,
I had a story
I had it all at once, it seemed
I had the grass in the field and laughter with beer and love on weekdays
Yet I always cowered when the subject of the future came up
But I've come to learn that everyday is the future
Setting it's course
On the wild seas of Life.

Let them not seek to discover who I was
from all that I have done and said.
An obstacle was there that transformed
the deeds and the manner of my life.
An obstacle was there that stopped me
many times when I was about to speak.
Only from my most imperceptible deeds
and my most covert writings--
from these alone will they understand me.
But perhaps it isn't worth exerting
such care and such effort for them to know me.
Later, in the more perfect society,
surely some other person created like me
will appear and act freely.

Even if you cannot shape your life as you want it,
at least try this
as much as you can; do not debase it
in excessive contact with the world,
in the excessive movements and talk.

Do not debase it by taking it,
dragging it often and exposing it
to the daily folly
of relationships and associations,
until it becomes burdensome as an alien life.

I don't feel at home where I am,
or where I spend time; only where,
beyond counting, there's freedom and calm,
that is, waves, that is, space where, when there,
you consist of pure freedom, which, seen,
turns that Gorgon, the crowd, to stone,
to pebbles  and sand . . . where life's mean-
ing lies buried, that never let one
come  within cannon shot yet.
From cloud-covered  wells untold
pour color and light, a fete
of cupids and Ledas in gold.
That is, silk and honey and sheen.
That is, boon and quiver and call.
That is, all that lives to be free,
needing no words at all.