(WARNING: some of you may not find this to your taste)


SONG of the ROYAL FOOD-TASTER
It’s always feast day
at the Court of King Eatmore
and Queen Yumyum
Bring it on, dish after dish -
anything that’s Meat, we’ll eat
When I arrived at Court
from my far-off village
I was but skin and bones
Now as Trusted Royal Taster
I am as big as Her Majesty’s –
Burp! – ****


SONG of the ROYAL JESTER
Bring it on
anything that moves
We’ll spike it through
for the spit -
with the spike through the mouth
and coming out the other end
For what is man and woman
King and Queen
but a mouth open
and a releasing rear?


CHORUS
Oh let us eat, eat, eat
drink and sate and ingratiate
We love
anything that crawls or creeps
or flies or moves
We can crunch and munch and digest
and add to our folds and waves -
for the World-sized King he said:
“Bring it IN!  Something local,
anything Exotic! Bring it IN!”
And the Immense Queen she screamed:
“Cream! Cream! Cream! More Cream
and Oil on my Pig’s Head!”


SONG of the ROYAL JESTER**
Ah, for what else did Nature fashion
life to be? – one way in and one way out
and lots to retain
Humanity is but a mouth and an ****
connected well in an ever-emptying barrel