Wandering paths, merely brush pushed aside by eager hands
feet pressing firm on uncharted land
the vantage points of a cliff undiscovered
rustles the passion in me, that I had longed to recover
lost along the way, between the miles traveled and moments marked in my past
I cover the tracks
for home is where I am at the moment
I reach to the sunrise arms spread wide trying to hold it
close to my chest to scare off the winter air rushing over my skin
one foot after the other and I begin
a skyline of ridges and peaks
seem to swallow me
in their lush valleys, rich with soil and trees racing to the heavens stopping just shy
I sit on the ledge of a rock jutting over the valley, this paradise is mine
wandering the world, the way it was meant to be
wandering forever the home always meant for me...

Where were you when it all faded
when my life broken and dilapidated
crumbled under the fire of a setting sun
we placed the stars in jars to light the path we chose to run
begging for the moon to paint the path with it's pending illumination
I set my eyes to the sky for the calming meditation
bow my head to Polaris for remaining still and patient
then blow kisses to the constellations

Yet where were you when it all faded?
When the heavens rained down onto my skin stripped naked
cast into the sea, I am the leviathan awaiting my chance to consume the world
trapped in the bottom of the ocean along with the oysters and pearls
that will one day line the wrists of rich girls
milk white with thick swirls
I'm alone in the ocean, buried 3 leagues
under this sea
bare of all the former traces of me

Where were you when it all faded?
absent from the life you vacated
I place these stars in jars and run through the scattered trees
in search of the path that brings you back to me...

A wolf never becomes man's best friend when locked away
Gnawing with ****** teeth and gums at the bars of the cage
Never turning to the aiding hands of man
Remaining wild howling and snarling from sun rise to rest
The eerie fog that comes from his breath
As his labored breathing
Lingers in the air of the evening
Heart only beating for three reasons,
Eating, sleeping, and dreaming of freedom
All other facets of life fade into the abyss
Of his existence
Snarling howling, sneering scowling
Aching for reprieve from the metal confines
The same ache pouring from my eyes
For the wolf and I share the same plight
Calling to the moon at night
Wild souls trapped locked away
Never bowing to society's demands trapped in this cage

I wish you'd open your heart as often as you opened your eyes
I wish I saw myself more in them, than in between your thighs
I wish your gasps and sighs
came from invigorating conversation
more than physical elation
I wish your skin didn't feel so **** smooth
I wish my hands would deny themselves of you
I wish my lips weren't going through withdrawal
rushing back whenever yours would call
I wish your kiss didn't make me tremble
I wish I didn't feel my heart disassemble
anytime you'd touch me too
Most of all I wish I didn't want you...

The familiar wrenching in my gut when you speak of love
The acidic burns and aches I keep bottled up
Become a flashflood
Rushing through my veins, poisioned lines constricting and forcing my extremities to spasm
You cast your words fruitlessly into the chasm
The indescribable void that lies before us
My hands scraped and bloodied from tearing down the nails that keep your heart boarded up
I can never break through the barrier you have erected
I leave myself vulnerable to your outlashes, you remain overly protected
Sheltered from the reality that is the extension of my love through every action
Every emotion you stockpile and ration
Maintaining a craving in the depths of my essence
For your ill fated presence
You bask in the symphonies that expel from my eyes gazing
Hear the strings and percussions playing
Without every fully repaying
Any emotional debt you may have accumulated over time
Fingers dancing along every line
I have written vast and true as the moon above
Yet I feel the familiar wrenching in my gut when you speak of love...

Your ghost tucks me in, yet never lets me sleep
Your ghost lies awake simply haunting me
Your ghost riles me awake
with the same familiar violent shake
that leaves me breathless alone only wrapped in sheets we bought together
Your ghost hides your letters
amid my stacks of papers
in hopes I find them later
finding them at precisely the moment when your memory has almost been entirely washed away
your ghost remains
leaving trinkets that force me to relapse
to a past
where your ghost never existed
for when you walked out of our life, you forget to take the ghost that came with it...