I lay here every night
Talking to non-existent voices
And they always understand,

Sometimes they'd laugh along,
Other times they'd cry so long;
Sometimes they are really loud
Other times quietened by a shroud.

But sometimes I wish
There'd be this
Other bed with
Another girl or boy
Probably older than I
And he/she would be down there
Nodding or
Getting an anxious look on
The face

And when they hear me out,
They'd rush towards me and
Grab hold of me in their arms
Repeating over and over again
"It's okay, I'm here. It's over..."

And I would truly
Have felt warmth and love
And I'd really be able to have
A real shoulder
To cry on

And maybe, then I wouldn't have to
Pretend every day and every night
That I have this
Warm loving family in my head
And though they disagree quite often
They'd still stick together
No matter what

Maybe then
I wouldn't have to
Cry writing this poem
Just wishing
Once again
I had a

Somebody

Nostalgia circulates through these veins
Same old people
New bodies
New pain
Love is barren for my heart is preoccupied
Common misconceptions take the throne and reign

I remember the days when I thought happiness was free
Soon I learned it never was
Someone else paid the price for me
Now simplicity has been crucified
Silence is reduced to bronze
Now I wonder what was the cause

Everything I knew was turned to ash
But who ignited the fire

harder to say

harder to hear

harder to live.