Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
Please pardon the interruption
I need to go try something new and awful
To make myself feel again
Be back later maybe
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
Inoutinoutinoutinout
Inhaleholdbreathcountexhale
Inoutinoutinoutinout
Roomspinningroo­mspinning
Diediediejustkillyourselfyou'reworthless
Inoutinoutinou­tinout
Panicpanicpanic
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
Nobody's problems are bigger or smaller than someone else's.
Just like people are different, we handle things differently.

And different things mean more to some than they do to others.
Some things I consider important are worthless to you. Vice versa.

I wish I'd learned this lesson a year ago. Maybe the love of my life would still be here.
I ****** up, and had to learn the hard way.

Don't you dare tell me what I'm supposed to feel about it.
A man brutally attacked me on facebook today. I'm glad facebook can't punch me.
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
What kind of joke am I?...

You just told me,
"I wanna be friends...
But that isn't good enough for you."


Do you not realize
What you've done?


You didn't "lead me on". You made me believe in you. Convinced me we had a future together.

You promised me we'd be okay.

You told me I meant the world to you.

You told me there was no place like my arms. That they were the most calming thing in the world.

You told me your mom wouldn't be angry.

You called it a speed bump... , yeah, that too.

You told me it would be over soon... how early was soon?

You told me your parents wouldn't come after me. That turned to ******* pretty quickly.

Your last interactions with me were a kiss...

You told me you'd always love me.

You told me you'd always want me.

That changed a lot.
You changed your stories...


Something like, "I thought he would get over me on his own. I fell out of love with him. It was obvious."

"How dare you. You treated me like ****. We're not okay."

"If I even love you, then..." ... which became "I care about you...", you avoid the L word now.

"Skyping with * is the best way to bring in the new year!" ...I feel so worthless now.

Your mom lied to my pastor, and his wife, and you, and my grandmother about me.

Is your relationship with her, a speed bump too? You lied. I actually believed you. Why don't you understand?

I've been waiting for 5 months. I'll end up waiting 50 years for you, because I'm really that stupid.

Your parents threatened me legally. They lied to people I love to ruin my life. You thanked them for it!

How do her lips taste? You tricked me. Thanks a lot.

You lied to me. You don't even use that word anymore. "care"...

You lied. You don't want me anymore. Why did you lie to so much? I'm all broken now.
ruined me.
you
don't even
see
why.
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
I tried my hardest to put myself in your shoes.
That was 5 months ago.

I tried harder yet to put myself in your shoes.
That was 4 months ago.

I had to try to put myself in your parents shoes.
That was hard. But I tried. That was 3 months ago.

I watched you pull magic switcheroos as you turned on me like a rabid animal.
That was hard. But I tried to understand. That was 3 months ago.

I blamed myself, and then, you blamed me too. Confirmed, I'm total ****, I guess.
That was 2 months ago.

I couldn't believe how you got with her. You told me it wasn't slow.
It took you 3 days to ruin me. Then you kept going.

And going.

And going.

Around 3 weeks ago, I started watching as you repeated all the lies.
But to her this time. Replaced me.

We talked on Tuesday. I thought it was productive. I thought you finally understood my feelings.
Guess not.

You don't seem to put yourself in my shoes.
You don't seem to comprehend why I feel the way I feel.
How can I be friends with you when you're the love of my life, and running around with her?

You have some new shoes.
I guess you can't find mine.
As the children would say,
Liar liar pants on fire...
...
Is it consuming you?
All I wanted was my best friend back.
Our bond back.
The love of my life back.
I'm pretty sure she goes by your name.
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
Quit saying sorry
And just fix it
God ******
Sam Conrad Jan 2014
I howl at the moonlight,
Though no one ever comes.
Save me...
Next page