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When i thought i was lost,
You knew exactly where i was.
And when i cried out to You in despair,
Asking you to find me,
Oh LORD,
You had always been right there.
Hear the thundering voice of God,
Oh people of the earth.
Let the lightening strike the dead parts of you and raise them to life.
In spirit and truth we live and breathe.
Hear the thundering voice of God,
Let it awaken the life inside of you!
Hear the thunder roar!
Rise up,
Oh church,
let the lightening course through your veins.
Hear the voice,
The thundering,
Voice of God
and repent for the kingdom of Heaven is near.
My dear heart, why do you fight so hard for a world that only wants to see you fail?
Come back to your senses, and come back to your Father.
All will be well
In my weeping and grieving,
Mourning and despair,
I cry out to the Lord just like the psalmist did.
I wait and i wait, in my weeping and shame.
My guilt covers me like a blanket wrapped snugly around my body.
I wait and i wait, in my weeping and heartache.
My spirit longs for you, oh Lord
But my heart wants something else to comfort me.
Strip me of this anguish, as i tremble and ache.
In my weeping, you tell me to rejoice for Your glory will be seen from within.
You take the most broken and outcast into Your glorious family.
In our weakness, we rejoice for we rely solely on Your strength.
He came into this world fully God and fully man.
having created all things for His glory, butΒ Β they did not recognise Him.
He disturbed them, He was despised by them.
all of nature bowed down to the Light, who was, is and will always be,
but man, in all their pride, rejected Him.
the divine nature and pureness of the lamb of God, subjected to division and darkness of the world.
living among sinners and oppressors.
living among the sick and the outcasts.
He lived a poor man's life and died a sinners death.
rejected by many, but loved by the Father is a love far more lovely than the foolish and temporary love that is often clung to.
Perfect and marvelous
He healed and ate,
taught and laughed
and loved a love that can still be felt through generations
and generations.
Glory, to the One who loves both Jew and Gentile,
Glory to the One who through His blood, brought salvation,
Glory to the One who conquered death,
and glory to He, who despite being hated by many, loved them so much, that He gave them freedom even though they were sinners.
yes, glory to the sinless lamb of God.
in darkness we roamed around this world, as wretched souls who were spiritually dead.
we are slaves to sin and oppositions of the Heavenly realms.
we thought we were free, but stuck in a prison with all our deepest desires, guilt, regret, shame and hurt splattered along the grey, decaying walls.
yet all of it should've been worth it, right?
we had some happiness, just a little, i swear it was worth it.
but its never enough, and we can try hard but we'll never be satisfied.
we make idols out of our deepest pleasures and bow down to statues and stars.
worshiping something, even though you'll say otherwise.
we serve sin.
we glorify sin.
and yet we want hope and peace that which cannot be found in the deep pit of division and transgression.
there was nowhere out.
you could try as hard as you want, but it's like an addiction,
and we're just looking for our next fix
because we thought there was no home to mend us.
maybe if i tried harder it would be different.
but i do try hard, at least i think i do.
its hard for me to tell You that i'm struggling, that i feel unable to be anymore.
everything feels so repetitious,
me wanting so desperately to be different but repeating the same patterns.
i try to take my feelings out of the equation, but they worm themselves back in and i'm left feeling like i don't belong with You.
like i cant do anything right.
like i'm never going to change.
i'm sorry.
i repeat.
i'm sorry.
i repeat.
like the tick of a clock, the sound deafening in the silence,
i repeat the words amidst the quiet.
loud and annoying,
i'm sorry.
i repeat.
but You're here, even in my struggles,
even when i'm sorry.
even when i feel like an addict unable to change, when i seek the change so much.
i'm sorry.
i repeat.
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