You have GOT to read betweeeen the lines.

Destinies can sometimes be sublime.
Not everything gets better with time.
The pain may never recline.
But it's not how we fall
But how we get up that we decide.

We may never know when or why.
So keep your ears open and eyes wide. . .
Be AWARE of the signs,
Realize real eyes.
And realize where the real lies.

Can't call it gold just cause it shines.

It seems like when it comes to love and trust.
The blind is leading the blind.
But the wisest man knows that he knows nothing at all.
And what we think we know,
has been assigned.
And as we continue to walk this path called life,
It's amazing what we'll find.
Full of give and take, love and hate,
Heaven and hell combined.

What good is the strength in your voice,
If it is absent from the mind?
So I ask myself,
To what use am I, if I was to remain undefined?
You see,
A tragedy can be a blessing.
As you allow the chips to fall,
they shall align. .

Just don't let the beautiful cover fool you.

You have GOT to reaaad between the lines.

So busy wrapped up in the way that the stars were glowing
that I couldn't possibly foresee the dark path before me.

Touched what I've never touched before, seen what I've never seen before.

So busy searching for a shooting star that I would never see
that I paid no attention to my blindside.
Naive to my inner demons
"Lolli gagging" through a field of dreams
blocking my bright eyes from my realities.
Dancing through  life as if I had nine lives.

Kept my mind angled in a way that could keep my fears at a far distance
Ears open but never listening.
So I soon became distracted with the way the moon seemed to call my name from a near distance.

Touched what I've never touched before seen what I've never seen before.

Snapped, crackled, and cringed into the real world.
Like a baby exiting the womb frightened by new sounds and new air.

Deep dive.
Feel the water burst against your skin, calm the waves that crash within.
slowly sink into the waters of integrity until its knee high.
Meet me at the seaside.
Climb the rocks of ambition and enter caves of progression, freely lose your sense of direction and enjoy the beauty and presence of a new life.
See you're so used to being poolside.
Experience cool vibes.
Let the sea breeze enter your pores and wash you free of disappointments, all while welcoming new tides.
New feelings and new sight.  
Joyful peach mornings and beautiful blue nights.
Allow the golden sand to absorb the overdue cries.
Deep dive.

The nerve of me.
To let my fascinations take a hold of me.
To let passion take control of me.
And to put all selfishness below me.

How dare I
how dare i stand down my guards
Pledge my commitment and forfeit my heart.
Deny all thoughts of resentment
And consistently give my all.

How could I.
Mistake this for truth.
Remain patient and follow suit.
Invite in such a vibrant connection without sufficient proof.
Invade such a strength filled heart and forget to take the loot.
Because ****. . .

I'm stripped of every thought I once thought that I knew.
Forced to be renewed.
Forced to stand alone, when all I've known is standing as two.
Left to wonder, what the **** do I do.

No one can hurt you like the one you've cared  for the most.

They told me I'd be foolish to let this fool get a chance to hurt me again.
But I happily stood to take a toast.

Ready to commit and leave all fear and regrets,
But there is nothing worse than for a man to feel the fear of being close.

Hold on, here comes that pain in my chest.
It's the same one I felt months ago.
How dare he leave me high dry and to be ghost.

But I digress. . .
here comes the pain in my chest.
It's left a hole that can't seem to be closed.
I'm drowning in my own clothes, I feel a mess.
I am a mess.
But I digress.

There's a pain in my chest.
And I can tell its decided to dwell here for a while.
I force every smile.
If I do. .
And you'd expect me to be through but I haven't even touched that phase quite yet.
My hearts in debt.
And until this bill is paid off,
Im restrained from taking my next step.

But this bill I accept. . .
I wrote the checks!
I bent over backwards and strained my neck.
I placed myself here.
Yet I don't feel an ounce of regret.

I'm hurt. I may be perfectly placed on the outside.
But burnt down inside.
But with every jump I took through each hurdle I faced.
It was evident that I tried.
And it felt so **** good.

Regardless these feelings shall forever leave their mark.
Even if we never do.
And even when this ache is absent,
We can never be "overdue".

What is love without affection?
Is it still love?
Or a similar feeling misleading the needy in the wrong direction. .
A common disease proclaimed infectious.
If so, let me know cause my heart needs a contraceptive.
What is love without affection?
Because if you love me then what's to question?

Exposed. Unclosed
Unused and disposed.
In an attempt to be attached,
I was detached and let go.
In search for affection
It became an infection.
Made the choice to walk my own path
With no sense of direction.
A woman of progression.
A girl of aggression.
Constant presence of a hole, never quit whole.
House was never home.
Never felt "with company"
But never left alone.
Refutation of becoming a clone.
Reputation of being a *****.
But what's the perfect woman?
Without an imperfect glitch?
Torn, never stitched.
Never fixed.
But never cry.
Not too many hellos.
Way too many goodbyes.
Once I filled myself with pride. .
Never felt more alive.
To begin the life I wanted to live,
I first had to die.
Try to understand, interpret just who I am.
All the places which I have fallen
Have led me to where I stand.