I was driving my
Clunker mercury
Down 95 to the
Train station
When i saw
The moon

It hung humongous
And low
Like an oyster *******
Poured of melted pearls
In the pale
Blue and deep purple
Of friday's dusk
Adorned with
A crown of
Dark clouds

While doing 86
In the left lane
I couldn't take my
Eyes off of it

Then i had an
Alarming thought
I don't think that
Any of the other cars
Or any of the people
Driving them
Zipping past me
Had any idea that
It was there at all

I carry this pit
With me everyday

Sometimes it's in my
Stomach
My back
My neck
The bottoms of
My feet
The back of my
Mind

It never goes
Away
It just moves

It seems to grow
Barbs when my
Thoughts shift
To it
As they usually
Do seemingly
Out of nowhere

Sometimes early
In the morning
Or late at night
Depending on how
You look at things
I can feel the pit
In mid transit

Looking for the
Discarded trash and
Snapped twigs of
A new nest
A new perch to
Take up residence

There is no point
To the pit
It is absurd
Because it exists
It is the
Materialization
Of all the

Rejected submissions
Sideways glances
Passing snickers
Passive aggressive emails
Shelves of unread books
Dust bunnies in the corner
Creaking of floor boards
Board meetings

Clenching of teeth behind
Closed lips

The fading din of a
Conversation as you
Enter the room

Obelisks of junk mail
That choke the
Arteries of the earth

Lies that canoe through
Your teeth into
The sea of
Pointless small talk

Time

A peach rotting
In a ceramic bowl
In a watercolor kitchen
Until the only thing left
Is the pit

I heard a girl
With her leg drapped
Over her boyfriend
On the train

"And like
I don't know why
I'm responsible for
The rent, chase
He should pay
All my rent and---"

Her boyfriend nodded
His head like an
Obedient boyfriend should
Many
"Yes babe"
"Chase should pay"
"You're the best"

I looked out the window
We had been stalled in
The sanguine of the
Penn station tunnel for
Fifteen minutes

Lots of trash
On those tracks
The smashed husks of
Super sized sodas
And the yellowed
Flayed remains of
Plastic bags

The materialization of
An entire species
Concentrated apathy
Decorating the lowest
Circle of its
Most desirable city

We pass an empty
Adjacent train
My eyes dart from
Window to window
The vacant seats
Face their respective
Directions and
The windows
Are still stained with
The fog of human heat

I think about
Islands made of plastic
In the middle of the
Ocean
And
How chase should
Pay the rent

Under harsh street lights
And a rusted skeletal overpass
We walked in the syrupy
Silence of a Sunnyside Saturday
Night

A man asked me in accented
English
"Want that burrito spicy?"
"Yes"
His eyebrows go up
"Spicy?"
"Yes, ******* spicy!"

He smiles to himself
Reaches back into the food truck
And pours sauces and
Liquids of varying color
And viscosity into the
Tortilla

Wraps it up for me
Gives me my change
And waves me off with a smile

When we get back to the apartment
She is mad
Because I choose to make love to the
Burrito instead of her
I can't help it
Drunk eating is one of the
Forbidden joys of life

She slams the door and
Shuffles around yelling
By the time I'm done the burrito
She is telling me to sleep on the couch
Which is fine because I can't
Feel my mouth anyway
The burrito is so **** spicy

I tell her this and that her
Kisses would be wasted
If she wants to waste her time
With me, I want to feel it

We sleep together for
The night

Coming home from the train station
A hare scurries through my headlights
Across the road and is gone

I think about all the hares
And all the other snippets of life
That we never consider
Let alone comprehend

When you make a
Chili dog you never
Forget to slice the onion
Into translucent white
Slices and make sure
Your mustard is dotted
With brown flecks

Make sure you have a tall
Frosty beer the color of
October sunsets
Lay back in a chair
And kick your feet up
For me

When your song comes
On your headphones
Dance like a chimpanzee
Amongst Ikea furniture for me

Don't think of me
When the sky is stained
Pink orange and aqua
Think of something better
Something that is real
Something whole
That doesn't want what
Everyone else wants it
To want

When you stand next to
My coffin
Throw an orchid for me
Or whatever flower is
Cheapest because honestly
I don't know what you're
Throwing

Make sure the soil is
Heavy and wet
Make it clump over the
Cross I didn't want
On the top of my
Pine box

Make sure you think about
How roots and grass
Will grow through me
Eat me and grow
Without a thought

If nature ceased to
Persevere
Humanity would be
Absurd in its
Reckless building
Destroying and poisoning

When you look at my
Pine box think about
Repetition and death
Think about moments
Of brilliance and the years
That beat them back
Remember that hollowness
Is its own form of substance

Most importantly
Remember that a chili dog
Needs onions
And that one day
Your corpse
No matter where it lays
Will fertilize future life

And the circle eats its own tail
Its own tail
Its own tale

Surrender your meager twitching
To the echoing riff of the complete
Watch yourself dissolve
Into the void's cast shadow
Let your panic be snuffed
By the beating of bees wings
And the sorrowful violin
Of crickets legs
At dusk

The fact that everything
Is born apart
But then returns
To the whole
Is maddening
Fulfilling
Hollowing
Frightening
And
Satisfying

All this from a day
Below 95 degrees.