If I die tonight would planes still fly?
If I die tonight would you still wonder if I cried ?
If I die tonight would you think of me here and there ?
If I die tonight would you act like I was never here?
If I die tonight would you be happier than  you are with me?
If I die tonight would you be okay if I left you be?
If I die tonight would you regret ever kissing me?
If I die tonight would you regret ever meeting me?
If I died tonight you'd be a better person...
If I died tonight would the pain I've caused just worsen?...

I say I'll end my life a lot
After I saw you yesterday my heart dropped
I haven't even bothered to pick it up
I love you with all my heart
But I'm done with this horrible part
Of life and pain
I just wanna end all my shame
I'll write you a letter
I'll tell you my good bye
Forever and always
I know it's not a lie

At one point you said you weren't ready
Now we're having this blessing
Things will get rough
Buttons will be pushed
But I want you to know
No matter how much we undergo
I'll stay by your side
As long as I got your back
I know you'll have mine.
This is a huge step in our relationship
But we gave each other so we'll make it
You're going to be great
Even the nights you have to stay up late
Warming the bottles, changing the diapers
You never were like the others
Your mightiness and royalty glows
You'll fall in love once you see his little toes
He's very fragile
So don't get crazy
My love we're having a baby




Xoxoxo
~sin

I miss you so much..
It took me a lot not to jump off the chair.
I told my self
"Why can't you be here"
I cry in my sleep
Wondering
How the **** could this be...
Please baby..
Just come back to me...

Red... Full of life.. Beautiful..
But why is it when you try to love it, it stabs you and hurts you..
The pain makes you drop it..
As it falls to the ground the rose feels nothing but pain also..
Because it cant be loved..
And this beautiful rose only damages the people who attempt to love it...

I wonder if I'm better
Play this playlist over and over
Maybe it'll make me feel better..
I hate this time of night...
I just needed closure...

Happy one year and 8 months...

You have the ***** to cheat and lie
But you can't face the woman
Who stayed by your side
No matter what
Through thick and thin
I was never gonna ******* leave you man
I don't understand
How the ******* can be like this
After everything we been through
After I carried your baby
You left me for someone new....

A birthday wish no one will understand
A birthday wish that will intertwine our hands
A birthday wish that you'll text me
A birthday wish that together forever we will be..
For my birthday I want a text
Saying how you love me
Though we may not be together
I still want you in my life forever..
I want no anger
Nor sadness
As long as you're in my life I know
That I'll be my happiest

The man I love is still there
I'll make you find yourself again baby I swear
Just give me a chance to be your friend
And from there we'll move on to something that will never end

Dearest Cypher,
Here I call out to you
To explain my love for you
You were once my everything
You're still the air I breathe
I can't understand why you would just up and leave
Just message me..

Butterflies in my stomach
Like when you ride a rollercoaster
Or the smell of cookies fresh out the oven.
I say goodnight yet I stay up an hour afterwards
Just because I cant get you off my mind.
Constantly running through my mind...
Its like this was all perfectly timed.
Everything fell into place..
I need to see you. So here I patiently wait.

You lied to me
You promised that you'll never break my heart
Why'd you lie to me?
And say you loved me from the start

Baby
Love bug
Husband
Father of my unborn
The best thing that's ever happened to me
You're the air I breathe
Forever mine
Us until the end of time <3

I imprinted on his soul
With out him I feel as if I'm becoming cold
The numbness in my heart
Causes us to drift apart
So I imprint on his soul
That way he'll never be alone
Together till the end of time
I am his and he is mine.

When night falls the thoughts become darker
When night falls my soul slips even farther
Though I no longer feel happiness
I reminisce about our sappiness
It's time to move on
No not what you think
Only to my next life
Where I'll forever he freed

One day I'll roll over
I'll kiss your cheek
As you snore asleep
Ill whisper in your ear
"Baby I'm forever here" <3

**** it I still need you.....

I gave yo my everything
In return you broke every piece of me
How dare you not care for me
How dare you be okay
Knowing you hurt me so tramindesly
I haven't ate
I haven't slept
All I do
Is ******* cry over you

Silence falls
As the demons crawl
The blood drips down
As he makes a frown
This is the end
Her last breath she said:
"till death do us part"
She followed as the demons led

I no longer feel beautiful
I'm just all types of shameful
I was left in dry cold air
******* it man this wasn't fair!!!
On everything I love I just want you back
Remember all those times you said I gave you a heart attack?
You said my body was a garden
I hoped for a love like ours since kindergarten
You haven't watered this so called beautiful garden
So now it's withered and no longer jaw dropping
You see me dying and you're still watching...
I have scars everywhere on my body
It's not even attractive
I ruined my beauty
Now I say I'm okay
**** I'd be a good actress

My husband is the best
I asked him if he thought another girl was pretty..
But he passed the test.
My husband Is the best
he makes me so happy
**** I'm truly blessed.

The love I have for you is irreplaceable  
Your body is just so irresistible
I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with you
Man the baby's I pop out for you
Will be the most angelic on earth
The vows we exchange
Will be the most truthful and loving on earth .

Dark room
And it smells like sugary perfume
Consumed by my thoughts..
How much does your love cost?
I cant breathe
I'm only drowning.
Watching as the world fades away..
Goodbye I'm off to a better place.

I heard you're with someone new
I guess I wasn't good enough for you
You make me feel like ****
I don't even wanna be alive man
**** this ****

End it here end it now
It'll only hurt for a little while
Reunite with our son in the sky
This is our last goodnight

No good
Like a rotten apple
Feeling worthless
Feeling stupid
Why can't I do anything right?
I just wasn't worthy
So I take this paint brush
Put it to my wrist
I think of all the things you've said.
The good and the bad..
I don't end it I just have no choice but to be sad..

Im done being broken
Your true colors are really showing
I'm done with the lies
I don't have **** to hide
I really do miss you no lie
Because I know I'll never find the love we had ever again in my life
Remember when you said "no matter what I'll stay by your side"
That was a lie
Because now that I need you the most
You're not in sight
Maybe you just have things to do
But I don't care what you do
Ima always give my heart to you
You're the love of my life
That ***** never gon change
I gave you my everything...

I know you're trying
I know how hard
I know you have no time
I know you've been busy..
We barely talk anymore..
Maybe im not the one slipping away as sand.
For I am the one who sits and waits
For your time dedicated to me...

No we haven't forgotten about you
We say goodnight to you thinking your on the moon
Or somewhere better where you are safe
You're still our son
That we never got to raise...

Tell me you love me
Tell me I'm your queen
Why don't you want things the way they used to be?
I used to make you so happy
Our love was so fancy
You used to tell me 'this is real. I want you forever'
Even when we argued and you gave me high blood pressure
Or when we laughed so hard we couldn't breathe
I found all that pain underneath
Maybe your past relationships were all broken foundations
This is my declaration
Of forever and always
All these fights are just a phase
We'll get through this no matter what it ******* takes
Because no matter what Ima always have your ******* back
**** I wish I was an amnesiac
We gon' make it baby
No matter what I'm your lady

I love you

I've never wanted to die so bad ...
Tears streaming down my eyes
How sad..
I don't know how
I don't know where
But I do know tonight will be my last ...

Memories of the time
I had no one by my side.
Then a few months later I had a group of them fakers
Now I got you and there's nothing they can do.

Remember that day
I texted you and said
"I never want to wake up and not be able to text you and tell you I love you"
This morning I rolled over
Only to realize
There was no longer a you and I
I prayed the night before
That you'd walk back through this door
I sit here patiently
As my tears hit the floor
I see nothing..

Was I not good enough?
**** man you're all I ever wanted
Now I got ****** hitting me up
Talm bout come through
**** it I STILL CLAIM YOU
A year and seven months
That's not gonna change
I'm still your wife
We still have our baby
I was I not good enough?
A blade to my wrist
But I promised you I wouldn't try it
That promise is still bliss
I'm never giving up on you
Keep ignoring me ..
Once upon a time you said YOUD NEVER GIVE UP ON ME
I love you so much..
Was I not good enough?

Please come back
Let me give you the love I have left

No excuses I need your attention
Please just sit just listen
Listen to me cry that I miss you so much
Listen to me yell for the way everything once was

She was prettier
She was thicker
She smiled more
The reasons why you left me..
I cared
I loved
I gave you my everything
The reasons why you left me...