i hate being okay
because okay is not happy
but okay is not bad enough for anyone to care

in days like these
i'd prefer not to breathe
i need someone
to hold me a bit tighter
but i push everyone further away
and then complain
when i'm left alone
i don't know what i want
but i know that id much rather die
than live another moment
drowning in my own made up sorrow
fresh air wont clear out my covered in dust lungs
i cant talk to anyone
i don't see the point in saying anything
ill let the loneliness eat me away
until my common sense comes back
give me some time to find myself
ill be human again
but not today
not right now.

it's like sinking,
you're not even trying to swim.
you can see the sun shining just above the water.
the rays shooting down on the ocean surface,
shattering into a million glitters
its the brightest light.

but you're down there.
in the dark, murky depths of the ocean.

i can see it
but for some reason
i don't bother swimming up to that beautiful light.

it is just this peaceful acceptance if sinking,
and not swimming up.

they told me to pour my heart into everything i do
so that's what i did
i poured and poured and poured,
now they ask me why i'm so empty
when i was just doing what i was told.