Drink in your feelings.
They go down like thick and grainy cough syrup,
And come up like thin and boiling coffee,
Suffocating your breath like *****.
Let them choke in your mouth and nose,
Strangling your better judgement and your hopes for better thoughts.

Drown in your self pity

She doesn't love you: never did.
You can't say she's gone when she was never there.
How many times must you throw yourself into the middle of heartache, like a courageous fighter into the ring.
You aren't courageous, only stupid.
No Rocky Balboa are you, just a love sick boy full of too much hope.
Why Are you testing your good fate?
Is she worth it?

You may think so now, but you have far more life ahead of you.

If you haven't realized by now, she isn't good enough for you and never was.

You would give her the world if only you had the means, yet she wouldn't give you a second glance.

But yes, you have little past to state that you aren't hopeful. Maybe someday girls will like nice guys, and God willing you will love them too.

Now get off to bed, to school, to practice, to your home, to your dog, to whatever life takes you to. You need to live your life

Sometimes we need to step away from our world, and look at the good things. It's so easy to get enthralled in the harshness of a situation when that one situation is the only thing you're thinking about. When we disengage, we realize how small everything is in the grand scheme of things. God is always right there with us, even when it doesn't seem that way.

One day this week I was praying in my car, listening to my CDs. As I was finished praying about how to get over this one girl (I keep it vague so as to help me forget) a certain song by the Eagles started playing: Take It Easy. If that isn't a sign from God then I must be crazy. So I have learned to step back, take it easy, work hard within my capabilities and not try to do Gods job, and leave the rest to God.

Goodnight :)

La vida tiene felicidad y tristeza
Todos experimentamos y no podemos hacer nada
La fe es todo, y haríamos que bien para recordarlo
Les dicen que tiempo curan todos, pero es con una cuesta muy precio.
Para ser curan por tiempo les necesitan que olvidar.
Olvida que dolerse.

No quiero olvidarte. Quiero recordar los tiempos fueron imponentes. Pero le no quieres.

Seguiré adelante sin ti, o posible con ti si quieres.

Si lee este, por favor sabes que te quiero estar feliz y en un lugar grande. Y vaya con Díos

One amazing hanger holds my tuxedo.
One clever little 5 ounce piece of plastic and metal conformed into the shape of a bony set of shoulders carries the slim weight of my most formal outfit. It hangs proudly draped in shiny black, pretending to be me when I myself don't don the suit.

Once my affair is over I replace the material to its home. Dressing the hanger as I did myself. Pants first, folded width wise over the pleated front then length wise over the bar that so nicely holds them. Then the shirt fronted with a dozen or more ruffles goes upon the plastic-ly skeletal shoulders. Around the shepherds hook goes the cummerbund and bowtie, both relaxed as if ready to take some time off. Finally the form fitted jacket falls delicately into place, like a foot into a sock. It knows where it belongs, always the exterior, protecting the snow white shirt it envelops. Now the entirety of the contents of the hanger slip inside the black plastic body bag intended to hold such articles. Then as if a corpse, it hangs in my closet until next time.

It feels like a liquid iron:
Sharp and cold and sickening.

The freezing metal begins
From my throat and moves to
My body. By then I feel nothing
But numbness. It's as if I'm falling
But there is no bottom. I hope there
Is no bottom, because if there is then I will surely hit it hard enough to explode upon the sharp-smooth black-blue slippery wet dark cave bottom.

But I am intact.
I stop spinning.
It was all synthetic.
Merely a glimpse into your hell
That jealousy has made my own

I love being by
Myself, so long as I am
By myself with you