let's act like it's all okay
for I cannot thrive without you
although I am proud of who I am,
I'm sorry for not feeling the way I want to feel.
I'm sorry for not loving you anymore.
no one can fill this space you create
a cure for my loneliness
a distraction from pain
(so come back to me, come back to your girl)
I'll tell you how I feel if you provide what I need.
it's a shame you can't be perfect for me,
please just adore me like I've asked you to.
and my sobbing *** would kiss your face,
every time you muttered "goodbye."
I'll shiver with you against this cold
you laugh like you're mine, but it's just not our time
my mind has been betraying me.
my mind has a habit of betraying me.
and I still belong to you,
so teach me how to erase your memory
when I'm out of the loop on your life
and these drunken decisions haunt me in segments.
I'm hopeless for the future
and it's all because of you
deceit is a skill, and I'm willing to learn.
I'm surprised at my own indifference
when something so real becomes distant
my friends turning into strangers
my nights turning into days.
I long to dance in your world,
to feel the solemn comfort of your arms around me
but I can't seem to find the line between the good and the insane.
I've cried tears of pain in your absence
leaving me with no person to turn to
[ I've found a rebound, it feels like I'm dream-bound
a more painless route for my heart to depart
I can't bear the pain a second time around ]
hookup with a looker
I can't do it anymore
unfulfilled and out of time.
thinking meaningless things matter.
making time for purposeless friends.
I can't sleep 'cause this brain of mine is on overdrive
craving a smoke to forget you
hoping your heaven is full of debris
when I'm left to myself, that's when I'm free
and I'm star-kissed under the moon
I was in love, I was abandoned.
to be in love, to be abandoned.
to be consumed by a brand new best friend,
you've swept me off my feet, and I know you will never let go.
04-13-19.