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Ruby Nemo Nov 2018
if you love it let it go,
if it returns it is real,
but as does a virus
or an insect in the walls.
to discern a lover from pests
or physical attraction from emotional sincerity
happiness from fulfillment . . .
drawing me back, every time, to you
caught in a trap,
a bitter taste for every confession;
painful admissions breaking their way through gripped teeth,
and since, in the past, you've destroyed all my standards
obliterated sensations of sanity
if you knock at my door,
you know I'll hand you the key
allowing you to enter
despite how poisonous you may be.
11-14-18
Ruby Nemo Nov 2018
you've stained me like a burn
a sizzling cyst that persists
tainted my perception through gore, imagine
twirling eternity between *******
oh love, how you've lost
and abandoned assuming good sides of me
a scratch unexpected
I never could have guessed it
don't speak, I am only a ghost
altered visuals because of your preference
don't push me, I'm high on the ground
through stammers and handshakes
I'd lose in the end
but honey, worry not for your misaligned friend
in a way, I'd have liked you to stay
so I could disappoint you everyday
that look locked on your face
it's fatal, humiliate
bring divinity into a life so uncommon
and tossed for the sake of desire.
11-03-18
Ruby Nemo Nov 2018
sweet caressing baby, so gently we arrive
like a doll your steps all align
freedom comes with age but us, dear... my rage...
binds me to this haunted home
no knowledge and no hopes to confront
an alibi, but too common to take names
disbelief riddles my head and tangles my tongue
burning spark that is growing inside
I upheld you from the beginning of our time
now sleep, and wake not
for the day is lonely as I am alone
instinct takes over and
makes a warm heart cold
11-05-18
Ruby Nemo Oct 2018
the breath that transports you to places of amusement
a slim figure, with hooded eyes that seek
lying to me through his teeth, showing affection

an easy way to confuse
someone who leaves you feeling used
maybe I initiate for the sake of lost time
and the moments I'll cease to remember

I'd trade my world for another catch
of your eyes already on mine
reluctant but simultaneously obsessed with us
the more I study, the more is forgotten
the more I see you, the more the earth pushes

deadweight happiness under a sheath of promises
travel back, taste the magic of reality
that stings your tongue, symmetric with my ballad
sing softly, don't refuse
10-26-18
Ruby Nemo Oct 2018
Every day gets better and I can sense the deepening connection but then he turns his back on me, taking us back to the beginning and leaving me in constant wonder. And he's beautiful like a chilly Big Prairie night sky with skin that beckons and a song that sends shivers.  How can I keep winding down this dark road when I know, yes I know, that so soon we will fall? My holiday road, so narrow I crawl, attempting to reach something out of my reach! My dear, come near, you're needed right here, alone but I feel like I'm with the whole world. How can you deceive, how you move every string, delicate and tender and afraid of tangles, how can you be sure of a love so undiscovered? A misunderstanding, perhaps no more than a dream.
10-18-2018
Ruby Nemo Oct 2018
color shifting galaxy, and I'm ever confused
going against the grain to prove
my mind can withstand the strain
trying new things while trusting this driver
awaited! too crowded for me!
feeling obnoxious and greedy and stuck . . .
but that's not what they tell me

they say I'm in love
that I overflow with passion
the little love bugs that dance around inside
but how can that be, when I can't feel my feet?
when my legs underneath
don't align with my mind?
and the sound of my voice comes from three levels deep?
I'll tag along one more selfish time
they're on to me - gonna figure me out
and all along I've stayed hidden
10-15-18
Ruby Nemo Oct 2018
stung, yet sprinkled, with crystalized particles
embarrassed to look up from my lap
a silent snicker, a squeeze of the knee
willingly sacrificing composure for adventure
run away with the secret!
hide it somewhere good!
lie to them, seek a personal advantage
pathetic and malicious
but abruptly amusing anyways
during the year final to this experience
to have this welcoming security
and excitement mistaken for anxiety
I cannot express my gratitude
I cannot explain how lucky I am
10-07-18
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