I never realized you could fall out of love
i thought it was just an excuse
for divorced people
who never loved in the first place
did we love in the first place?
I didnt know you could stop caring about me
I didnt know I could stop caring about you
did i stop caring about you
Have i stopped caring
since when did i ever want to not talk to you
since when did we not want to be together
since when did your presence scare me
when did we scare eachother
when did us become a we
when did we seperate
I dont understand why we didnt stay with eachother
why we couldnt understnad eachother
why we couldnt be
BFF's
but even that was a lie
because Im not sure
you where ever really my friend
my friend
are you my friend?
are you still there for me?
maybe you wont be
maybe we arent
maybe
maybe you still love me
but only if i could believe in that lie
because you told me
you no longer care about my fragility
you no longer care if im broken
you no longer care im hurting
you no longer
want to be next to me
we no longer will be
I'm sorry
but why
I'm the only one crying
when you are smiling
because you told me
the truth set you free
but it captivated me
now im stuck in a rut
stuck in a cage'
when i cant escape
I cant stay
in this charade
you broke my happiness
I can no longer last in this
you kept me in the shade
only to bring me to light
at the worst time
tell me im not wanted
when you where the only person i thought wanted me
as soon as i accepted I wasnt alone
you left me
you see
you made me get better just to send me back where i came from
what type of love
and you have the audacity to act
as if this will hurt you
as if you didnt do anything wrong
as if im over exaggerating
as if your better than me
your not better than me
just because i learned how to take down my walls in front of you
does not make me weak
It makes me stronger
than you
just because you saw the sad side of me
thats not all there is
I showed you I was fragile
but thats it
you wont see past what you think I am
to see thats not me
you wont see
Nina see me
you keep yourself in the dark
pushed us apart
so you can be alone
its not me its you
its not you its me
its not us anymore
there is no longer us
bff?
*******
your just another person who took advantage
of my weakness
your just as bad as them

Love
Being able to **** yourself for someone else
waking up wondering about if they ate
before you realize your hungry
would give your happiness to see thier smile
thier smile
Love
being caught ina place where you would rather see yourself fail
then them feel a glimsp of sadness
you would do anything to save them
from thier own reality
Love
unrecognizable by you
you dont understand the way that I care for you
I still call it love
because it is
and i dont pretend we never felt it
that i didnt feel it
you didnt feel it?
the pain we felt when the other one was hurting
the impact of our words on the others life
the lack of tolerance of the other person in pain
I still cant see you in pain
Love
is what it was
We will always have a spot in eachothers heart
whether you admit it
or not

Its been 11 hours and 47 minutes since you told me  you don't care anymore
Since my heart stopped beating
since you left me crying at your door
Its been 11 hours and 50 minuets since you told me you dont love me anymore
Since my greatest fears came true
Since i realized you slipped through ny fingers
That only person who knew what to do to
Knew how to Help me
But Left me
Because im not enough anything
For you
Its been 11 hours and 53 minuets since i lost my heart
It wont restart
Because i no longer want it to
If it does i feel
And this whole thing is real
If i dont have a heart beat i can forget it's there
Forget you don't care
About me
Its been 11 hours and 55 minuets since i tried to **** myself for the first time
Since i actually considered death worth a try
Because this hell you put me in
Shouldnt have to be my life
Something must be better
On the other side
But it didn't work
I knew it wouldn't
Ended up throwing up over a bucket like i always knew i could
Ended up.emptier than before
Because i cant leave this world
Im trapped in a hell with you

We always promised to help eachother
But i guess that was never true
I guess you never meant it
When you said i love you too
So i guess its over now
But it still doesn't hurt
Because its only been 12 hours
Since i learned how to stop loving anymore

She offered me a trade
A bottle of wine for my midnight thoughts
My hidden plots
To take over the world
What i thought of every girl i walked by
Have i ever been high
Do i think im gay
No by the way
But all the same
My midnight thoughts
For a drunked good time
For a bottle of wine
What the hell
Im already dead inside
Might as well trade my mind
For a bottle of wine

She didn't know I did it for her
I was trying to be perfect for you
its all for you

Shes perfect
But she asked me why her
Why is she the only one
Who i need more
Than oxygen
Air
she knocks the breathe out my lungs
I can't speak im so stuned
I can never get enough
She
She Is my everything
Everything is her to me
Shes all i can see
Obsession she called it
But i call it love
Love me
But she cant love me
Im nobody
To her everything
Obessesion
She's all i can think about
All i strive to be
When she threatened to leave me
I couldn't breathe
Panic attack
leaving her feels worse dieing
I struggle
To mutter
The word
Sorry
As if she cares what i think
No matter what she thinks
I will never leave her
But what if she leaves me
Shes All i need
My Obession

I have no one to tell me it will be ok