"Are you ok?"
Physically, yes.
Emotionally, most definitely not.
My mind is racing with 1,000 thoughts
but not one of them is coherent.
My brain can't put a sentence together
and I can't think straight.
"Yes, I'm fine. Thank you."

how do I repair the relationships I've slaughtered?
how do I apologise for ruining lives?
is it too late?
is there such thing as it being too late?
how do I accept that swallowing pride and saying sorry once in a while can be a good thing?

I wish I could have a relationship like other people do
other people are happy to commit to that one person
and let them in
but I can't do that
I can't get close to someone and trust them enough
I can't tell them everything
so instead a group of people will all know different things about me
maybe when I die they'll all share stories
and realise I trusted them more than they thought