Crush
Cute
        Dating
        Kissing
        Together
      ­  In Love
        Happy
                  Key
Moving In
        Weird
                  Different
                  Ru­de
Isolated
                  Mean
Depression
                  A­nger
                  Hurtful
        Arguments
        Yelling
­                  Rage
                  Seeing Red
                  Slap
        Silence
        Pin Drop
        Realisation
Betrayal
Crying
                  Apolog­ies
                  Promises
                  Empty
Broken
Den­ial
Alone
                   Waiting
Deciding
        Compromising
Staying
Believing
Trusting
­        Time
                  Lies
                  No Different
                  Mean
                  Anger
        ­          Hurtful
                  Rage

Was watching Disney's The Lion King on VHS
Got it from the thrift store for a dollar
When it started up
It was halfway through
That realization made me wonder

Someone somewhere started this movie
But they never finished it
They stopped it
Took it out of their VCR
They never picked it up again
Except to pack it in a box of old forgotten things
I wonder what made them stop it

Was it a child who went to play outside with his friends?
And when he returned
Was he grown with no desire to be a child again?
Did he find a better movie to watch?
Or did he find the movie boring and never bothered with it again?

Was it a Mother watching it while feeding her baby?
Did she leave to get more food?
And while she was out
Did she come across the new and improved DVD player?
Did she find it on sale and thought it must be better than VHS?

Maybe it was an old man reliving an easier day when he was younger
Was it the last movie he watched
Before the paramedics stopped it
And took him away to his final resting place?

Was it his daughter who took it out of the VCR
Placed it carefully in its casing
Put it with all the other VHS tapes she found in an old box
Gave that box to the thrift shop
Where I inevitably found it and brought it home

Why was this VHS forgotten?

Bubble smiled, --for what had Bubble to fear? Bubble bade the gentlemen welcome. The shriek, Bubble said, was my own in a dream. The old man, Bubble mentioned, was absent in the country. Bubble took my visitors all over the house. Bubble bade them search --search well. Bubble led them, at length, to his chamber. Bubble showed them his treasures, secure, undisturbed. In the enthusiasm of my confidence, Bubble brought chairs into the room, and desired them here to rest from their fatigues, while Bubble myself, in the wild audacity of my perfect triumph, placed my own seat upon the very spot beneath which reposed the corpse of the victim.

-The Telltale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe

It's been a while
Since I last saw you
Where have you been?
What have you seen?

What crawls through your head
That no one can understand
Not even me?

Rain washes away our sorrows
It soaks us to the bone
As we laugh and joke together
Nothing matters now

Just relax
Smell the sweet wet grass
Under your feet and
The rain in your hair

Feel the rain drench your clothes
As small shivers run down
Down your back to your toes
Let the coolness shimmer through your system

Listen to the jokes and laughter
That's happening all around you
The steady pitter-patter
Of rain falling at your feet

Taste the gift of nature
Let it run down your throat
Taste every last drop
Remember the sweetness for always

Lift your hands up
Touch the wet sky above you
Look through the tears of the Earth
And see the beautiful clouds

Always remember the rain
For soon it will be gone

I live on my own
I make my own way
Pay my own bills
Yet you still consider me a child?
Me, who has moved out on my own?
Me, who has moved entire states on my own?
How insulting
Do you still not believe?
Why do you insist I can not make it?
Can you not see I'm doing just fine?
I pay my own bills
I make my own money
I've gotten so far in life
And at such a young age
I'm very proud of myself but..
Why can't you be proud too?
No, I didn't go to school
I know that's what you wanted
But I'm already so far ahead
Nothing will stop me from going farther
Nothing

slender man?
why are you like this?
why so tall with so many arms and legs?
is it to creep into childrens dreams?
to ****** them up from up above?

slender man?
where are you?
why so distant & in the shadows?
always in the corners of pictures...
never the focus till after you're gone...

slender man?
where are the children?
why have you taken them away?
did you take them to a peaceful place?
are the resting fast asleep now?
or playing and laughing the day away?

slender man?
can i come too?
i want to laugh and play too
i want peaceful sleep too
where are you?

slender man?
is that you?

What would you do if I were to say I miss you?

Would you stay this time?
Or would you leave me again?

Would you say I missed you too?
Or would you stare awkwardly into space
Trying to avoid eye contact?

Even if you did say it,
How could I know it to be true?
How could I tell if you are genuine or not?
You've let me down so many times before

I could never trust you, Silly me
And why should I?
You've surely given me no reason to do so
Why should I care?

But why can't I stop caring?
You were such a big part of me
Just by not even being there

Sometimes I wonder if you ever stop to think of me
I wonder how you feel when you envision my face

Where are you Shawn?

Don't know what to do
or say
how do I keep going
when theres no point anymore?
my solution?
I have none
yours?
Lets just put put her on drugs
meds cure everything
You can't ignord me forever
the way I feel
you can't always drug away everything sad
sometimes you have to face it head on
but I can't do that
not without you
but you won't even look at me anymore will you?
**LOOK AT ME

I thought I had it right
I thought everything was they way it should be
That's a lie

Everything stopped tonight
But just for a moment and not a moment more
Suspended in time and space

I watch everything crash to the floor around me
All in slow motion
I think of everything I've learned tonight....

I'm... so... tired....

I can't sleep, again.
I've tried everything; pills give me a hangover, white noise is just that. Noise.
I have to try to find a rhythm in it even though there's intentionally not one

And what's THAT noise? The thuh-thump thuh-thump? Is that my heart beat?
I wonder if I could count all the beats.. oh great. I thought the thought. Now I MUST count them all..

1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..

There's blue and red light.
Ambulance. Someone's in pain.
I'm also in pain. My whole body hurts.
And it feels funny. There's an itch on my arm. I have to scratch it.

I know if I get my body in just the absolute PERFECT position, I'll sleep like a dream.
But my hand is wrong. It'll be better if I put it this way..
No, that's not right either. And my leg is itchy. I have to itch my leg really badly.

And there's a car pulling into my parking lot. I wonder who's in the car. Is it the noisy neighbor above me?

I wonder if they know how loud they are.
Especially since it's so late at night.
Oh yeah.. It's still night. I'm supposed to be trying to sleep. But I'm still not in the right spot.

Maybe if I adjust the pillow.. no.. I felt better before I moved and now I'll NEVER get back to how I was...

Shh.. do you hear that?

Thuh-thump thuh-thump

Oh that's right..

9..10..11..12..13..14..

How can this be?
He and me?

Am I dreaming?
Will I wake soon to find it's not true?

Have I gone mad and made it up?
A mere figment of my imagination?

Or maybe he's the crazy one!
Does he even know what he does to me?

He smiles every time I'm near
But what if it's the smile of a lunatic?

I mean the Joker smiles doesn't he?
And Harley Quinn is just as crazy

That's it! What if we are BOTH crazy?
Well then we'd be a perfect match, right?

Please don't wake me up,
Or if I must
Please let this be really real!! ❤️