he couldn’t sleep at night. if he could count the times that he twisted and turned his body to get a comfortable position, he would be more frustrated and he is afraid he will be awake for the rest of the quiet times. so he grabbed the pillow next to him and embraced it as if his life depended on it.

however, the soft pillow that caresses his cheeks smells like his favorite perfume. it smelt like the aroma of roses that almost had the faint scent of the sea and serenity.

it was not his.

it was hers.

her head laid against the pillow the other night and the remains of it crawled through his head. the first thing that lingered on his mind was her hair. he remembers the day when her soft locks intertwined with his fingers as he eagerly try to do a simple braid. it was relaxing for you that it put her thoughts into ease after a long day from university.

the next one was her eyes. it was a drunken night when she told him that eye contacts are very important when he is talking with his date. so after a few denials, little arguments and small talks, she dared him to look at her straight in the eyes for a whole minute.

and he got lost in tracks as he stared at the most beautiful pair of eyes he had ever seen in his whole entire life. he wanted his face to lean in further to capture those lips,

oh, her lips.

those lips that he finds the most endearing among her being. plump, soft, sometimes it curls into a pout. he thought how lovely it is to kiss your lips every day with such affection and delight.

thinking of her sweet features became enough for him to drive himself away from the reality where the idea of them exists. maybe one day he will be courageous enough to spill his feelings and wrap her around his arms at night just like the pillow he is hugging right now.

his eyes wandered for the last time. he looked for his phone to turn it off but he noticed that the time written on his screen was 11:11.

and so he wished he wouldn’t be the only one dreaming of his desire to hold her for the rest of his life anymore.

the dark coffee i ordered swirled in motion as i stirred it with the tiny spoon that i got from the counter. i couldn’t recall how many times i’ve been doing it but all i know is that i was supposed to meet you in an hour and a half, and that my drink has already gone cold.

the text message i sent to you asking your whereabouts delivered itself thirty minutes ago. i put the spoon back on the table and gave it a rest. i looked around and started to stare at the window beside me with the hope that one of these people that i would see was finally going to be you. however, after i ended up observing dozens of figures who were just passing by at the front, another thirty minutes ran on the clock and you weren’t still here.

i typed another message to check up on you. i pulled my phone out of my dark leather bag and unlocked it. i was expecting to see at least one message but your name was not on it.

“are we still meeting today?", i said. the sky became dim and the rain started to pour, and that was when i started to wonder if you already forgot about me.

you see, i know that you have plenty of things to ponder on and i also know that the picture of me is not included in that one. me on the other hand, my list is good to go except that your name that was sitting on the top of everything was still waiting to be cleared out from it.

i couldn’t understand why and how i can’t get you out of my spinning head. every melancholic song that i hear shouts your name. there was no film that we didn’t talk about and i hate the fact that even my favorite film is your favorite. we share our guilty pleasures and the rest is history.

but you couldn’t share what i am ready to share with you — love.

i suddenly felt a tap on my shoulders. i was so lost in my worries that i didn’t see you enter the coffee shop. i looked up and saw you. i think you said “oh, hi.” to me and pulled me into an embrace. i noticed that there were also a few marks of droplets of the rain on your shoulders but your sweet scent remained that makes me not want to let go of you anymore.

“sorry. late.” you started to put your bag and your macbook down on the table beside my cup. you sat in front of me and asked  “were you waiting for me for like, maybe an hour already?”

i shrugged and took a sip of my cold coffee. i said no. i tore a small pack of sugar and poured it in my coffee. i thought it was bittersweet, just like this day was.

“i came in about ten minutes ago.”

because ******* hell, if i’m waiting for you for almost two years, i surely do not mind sitting in this coffee shop for another two hours.

the wood is burning and its ashes danced with the wind. the clean, white sand became gloomy ever since the sun started to yawn, making its way to sleep as the moon rises from its bed.

and there you are, staring at the dimmed sky. the ocean is serenading us with its waves. calm and still. tranquility embracing our souls.

the tiny stars are back to say hello to you.

they love you.

the universe loves you.

and i love you.