i really thought it was love
"i love you...i just can't let people treat me this way baby..."
...i thought i had courage...
she howled
"PLEASE DON'T LEAVE MEEEE, I'LL **** MYSELF,I SWEAR,PLEEEEASE!"
we murdered love
"i love you, but..**** baby...you treat me like ****...i have to leave"
i had nowhere to go
i just wanted someone to think i had courage
we hit the gin hard that day, that was our drink
she liked it with ice,lime,tonic
i took it hot and straight
man...she blocked the doorway again
she grabbed the kitchen knife
i really thought it was love
she was on the wall,carpet,all over the door
now we really could see our love
it stained
a meaty hunk of it hung from her arm
love looks like
jelly

I was a sad man
the world was sad
my grandmother gave me a $20 weekly allowance
from some sort of government disability fund
I would walk to the corner of 10th and Walnut and purchase
4 - 40 oz Mickeys, a pack of condoms, and a pack of reds
and met her at the bus stop
some black girls mugged her for some christmas gifts there once...
although it makes me smirk now
being 17 was hard

I stood in the living room
on display, proud
proud of the shame i've become
strong, muscular, beautiful
23, wasted, dying
I watched you frown
I am the rebelious oak
i'll **** this land forever

they say she is something
like an apple tree
I guess its her form...
I stood beneath the branches
the leaves
it was comfortable
but the sun sneaks between
blinding eyes
illuminating the scars
then I saw the noose...
we all hung there
the apples, the branches,
and me
more men came
they'd been watching
we all hung there
it was comfortable
in her shade
she could take us all
she was very strong

your a beauty B.C.
one of Caesar's finest conquests
you shrug at paintings
of the crucifixion
you should be cracked stone
fragile, withstanding centuries
gazes knowing your importance
not ever knowing why
Julius' knees would have buckled
if he'd had you