if only we could choose which scars
fade and which remain;
i'd rid myself of every that bore
semblance to your name.

i still listen to every song you
introduced me to and lately
i haven't been quite so sad
when i do.

When you are alone at
night
lying on your back with
your mind full of endless
thoughts of ex-lovers and old
friends, people you've lost and those
you regret losing

as youre lying on your back
staring at the empty ceiling with  
these endless thoughts over
flowing through your mind you
come to realize the memories
of these people are more than just
memories

watery eyed
you begin to miss them
more than ever and the memories
with them are played on repeat
like a favorite song

You turn over to your side,
crying, bringing your blanket up
to cry into and you begin to tell
yourself "why, how could this happen?they were everything to me now I have nothing.. "
Your words go into circles and the pain
grows greater

pulling the pillow close to your face
hovering yourself so no one can hear you
scream "why!"
crying to the point of hyperventilation
its late and you have no one to call
you've never felt so empty

your eyes are heavy and your
voice starts to whisper "why... why.."
blinking slowly, your eyes begin
to slowly close

with the last thoughts in your head
wondering if thing will get better
hoping the memories of these
ex-lovers and old friends will start
to fade and leave your mind
to rest for the night
just for
the
night