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furies Oct 2014
Explain to me this
Why does the world say that love is the best feeling?
When all I feel is cold
Empty words from empty people
****** words tumbling from my mouth
Masking the ****** up feelings inside
The tough face I put on melting for moments
Before I realize that those moments of weakness
Ruin my chances to live
Because being numb is better than being vulnerable

Explain to me this
Why does everyone say it's okay to take a chance?
That it'll be worth it to say what I feel?
When all that leaves is ****** souls
and broken hearts. Jagged words pierce
skin, leave blood on my fingers.
Whose blood is it?
Because what hurts even more than rejection
is being rejected by someone you had a chance with.
Not even rejected actually-
But completely sidelined by.

Explain to me this
Why can't I have a life of friendships?
Why do I have to live through others,
Without seeing anything for myself?
Learning and yearning
Wishing for something different
Hoping for someone to save me.
furies Sep 2014
Sinking ships
Severed rain
Drops of gold
Floating dreams
Crying oceans
Soaring clouds
Hurt filled caskets
Ends of vows
furies Sep 2014
I've been lounging in the sweater
I wear it even when I know I'll be with
People that would provide their own sweaters.
But nothing can warm me like the sweater.
I wear it year round, despite the weather.
I once let another's fingers unzip the sweater
and the next moment I was across the room.
I apologized of course, but those fingers
Never did touch me again..

I know why people are tied to objects
I know why sweaters are so sentimental
The person whose comfort I seek
Could not have picked better torture
Than the torture of leaving me the sweater.
I broke the sweater wearer,
But now the sweater will break me.
furies Sep 2014
Shaky hands, shaky fates
Steady beat, steady life
furies Sep 2014
Losing myself
In clouds of desperation
Oblivious to the hands
Reaching towards my trembling fingers
Just asking for me to try a little
Asking me to reach and reciprocate
To allow myself to be pulled to the other side
But I've made my home here
In the pits of despair
And the effort to accept the help
Seems infinite
Compared to the ease of huddling
Into the nooks of numbness
furies Sep 2014
I learn so much about you
Everyday another boulder falls
Crushing countless other beliefs
Beliefs in your honesty being no.1

Forget what the words do to me
Don't you wish it wasn't said
That you'd lost your charm?
Or better yet, don't you care
About all the people you've lost!

I wish I could say
That knowing how painful
You're realization might be
Would make me stay by your side
And make me want to be your support
But it overwhelms me

I don't care about your pain
How selfish
Oh well
furies Sep 2014
Please stop
I give in, time after time
Promises to myself
Promises to my faith
Broken- shattered so easily. Too easily.
Fragmented pieces flying
Embedding themselves within my soul
Like the pain a newborn feels from a splinter
Like the ache an arthritic man feels as he ages
Like the sting a toddler feels from a bee
Seemingly insignificant
Yet so terrifyingly huge
You keep coming back
I need you to stop
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