A million words I want to say
The though of you won't go away
I've fallen oh so deep
Sometimes I can hardly sleep

Memories etched in my mind
Pictures of moments kept for mine
Two hearts beat so fast
I wish that this would last

Distance has kept us away
But we still decided to stay
I'd cry a million tears
Cause I've found happiness I've longed for years

You mean the world to me
I just wished you could see
They way our eyes sparkle
It is truly remarkable

You changed the heart of a hopeless girl
Who's mind would always swirl
Thinking of a deep black hole
******* happiness out of her soul

That's not a normal person could do
I just wished you could see that too

Late January when we first met
I was in some kind of darkness I can never forget
You have been all sad and blue
All you wanted was someone to talk to

I thought hours later you would forget me
I thought you were like everyone else I set free
But you stayed with me until the break of dawn
You taught me that my heart can still be sewn

I told you my secrets, I told you my white lies
I told you the reasons I read through the lines
Still, you chose to see beyond that
You chose to sit in the seat where I sat

You told me about the pain I went through
You told me everything you saw through
My broken heart started to build its pieces
It even straightened out the creases

How you did all of that amazes me
You can see things I couldn't see
I'm thankful that I have met you
Because I know you have been true

Every slow love song now reminds me of you
And now, I just feel so brand new

I remember the day I first met you
My heart fluttered as you walked across the room
I didn't mind that you were silent
But I wanted to question what it meant

Days passed before you decided to talk
And my world chose to halt
It was all in slow motion
And I loved every single moment

As days flew, we became close
But what ruined it is the path that you chose
You decided to shut me out of your life
As if I was not worthy of your time

Many tears have been shed
You didn't even know what the scars meant
I decided to choose the path I'd regret
To forget about the times that we spent

I wish you knew the damage you caused
Or how much I valued our friendship
But it can never be mended
Because I'm not the same person I was before

You ruined me entirely
And not even my friends will be able to fix me

Days turn to hours, minutes turn to seconds
Who would've thought that a simple college girl like me would meet someone incredible
In a simple glance, I knew there was something with you
Like I felt that we were destined to meet at some point in our lives

You're than what meets the eye
You're funny, caring, smart, witty, and fun to be with
Honestly, you're a total package
You're also kind, sweet, and loving
How can I forget that?

Perhaps time always meant something
The timing was always perfect with you
I never felt as if I needed to pretend for a minute
All I was is authentic to you

I've given myself a million reasons to hold back
I've told myself a thousand times that it's not time yet
But slowly, my heart keeps opening up to you

You've seen me in ways no one ever has and you have no idea about it
It's always been so crazy for me that you've made me feel calm
You've always given me reasons to believe in myself as if I can do anything in life
You've made my heart flutter a million times in the past months and I can't seem to tell you

I'm afraid that perhaps you don't feel the same way as me
Perhaps you have someone else in your life as what always happens to me
It's the fear of being broken that has kept me from you
It's the fear that has made me say the words "I love you" in whispers
I'm afraid how you'd respond to it

I told you countless of times that I've dreamt about us
I've dreamt of being with you in my safe place
I've dreamt of nightmares and you were always my safe place
Whatever I'm afraid of, other than that, you made me feel safe
But I could never tell you that I've dreamt about you kissing me

It was always a secret so hard to keep
It was like a complete fantasy that made my heart ache for you
I wanted so badly for it to be real
I wanted you beside me for once so I can hold you tight

But what can I do with this distance?
We're miles away from each other and I can never reach you
I can only fantasize all of this in my head

Is this all we'll ever be?
Cause I hope not
You mean the world to me
You mean more than you think you do

I don't want to hide anymore
I really want to be with you
And I really love you

I always thought that I was fine
But I can't forget when you were mine
Notes and letters I always read
Knowing I cannot have what I really need

You were my love, my everything
Now, I feel as if I'm nothing
We stayed friends, me and you
But I know I hurt star, mermaid and boo

Nights I spent praying for a sign
Just to bring back what once was mine
Ignite the flame that once was there
And bring back the times where we truly care

You're still my love and always will
but deep inside I know I killed
The real me, my old self
Burned to ashes and put on a shelf

Until now, I still hope
That one day I will stop to choke
On my own tears that is for you
Mend my heart that broke for you

Someday I'll wait, someday I'll find
The real truth of what's left behind

Pictures scattered everywhere
Of the whole truth of this love affair
A distinct voice ringing in my head
Saying "you know that this love is dead"

Pain and anger pulses thru my soul
Gives me anxiety like nothing I can control
Pictures and letters I keep throwing away
Praying and hoping you would let me stay

Memories in sunsets, sunrise and dawn
Singing up to the morning sun
As tears keep falling on my face
I felt like I have lost this race

Yesterday felt like everything was fine
In fact, you were always there to remind
Marriage, honeymoon and kids you promised
But now, our love has vanished

Perhaps you were just meant to pass
And now I know our love wouldn't last

Chances, they come
Risks, we take
I can't quite comprehend
What's at stake

A word from one
A paragraph for two
I can't fully understand
Just what to do

they give off love
The hate they take
Round and round in circles
With the mess that I make

You see one side
But I see a few
You don't know what's on my mind
So what should I do?

Petals of flowers
Keep spreading across
This ache in my heart
It's something that should be lost

But pebbles and rocks
I just throw them away
All the pain and the angry
Should just wash away

A promise, a vow
Whatever it may seem
It's completely important
What I wish to redeem

My heart is something too hard to take
Risks and challenges is what you have to take

Dear soulmate of mine,
Everyday I dream about the days I'll spend with you
Each passing moment, I try to think of you
I wonder how you are doing in this world
If you're with someone who doesn't see your worth

I'm dying to meet you someday
I can't wait to wear this beautiful wedding dress
I can't wait to walk down the aisle in the arms of my father
I can't wait to see your tear stained face while waiting at the altar
I can't wait until I'm completely yours

I can't wait for our honeymoon where we make love beneath the moonlit sky
I can't wait to hear your soft breaths as you sleep beside me
I can't wait to wake up holding you close
I can't wait to kiss your lips and say "I love you" all the time
I can't wait until I get to bear your children

All these thoughts in my head make my heart flutter
But I can't stop thinking if I have met you already
If we've crossed paths before and I have let you go
I wonder if we've met and I've hurt you in the worst way possible
If I did, are you still willing to accept me?

I wonder if this fantasy is just something I make up in my mind
That all my anxiety comes rushing at the thought of you
I wanted so badly to be yours
What if I failed in this lifetime?
Will we cross paths again?

If you knew the demons I kept inside my head,
Will you still love me, then?
If you knew the pain I'm capable of giving,
Will you still want me, then?
Am I still worth it for you?

I'm scared to know if it's yes or no
I'm scared to know the truth and end up hurting myself again
I can't feel the same pain I felt the past few years of my life
It took me so long to be who I am today
Will you still want me?

Of course, you would and why should I worry?
You are the person who was meant to complete me
You are the missing piece in my messed up life
You were always meant to find me regardless of my past
You were created to be with someone like me

I'm just a messed up girl with little to offer
But I can promise you I can give you my heart
It may be broken and bruised because of all the mistakes I've made
But, I promise, my love, I tried to fix it for you
I tried to piece it together for you

I can't give you the world but I can promise to give you the real me
No filters, just my whole self
I promised to offer this to you
Including the beautiful vow I've written in my head for you
You are worth it for me

I am counting on the days until you're officially mine
Someday we'll get there in the perfect time
Sincerely, me

Emotions flowing from two broken hearts
Regardless the distance that kept them apart
Memories were shared of lessons we’ve learned
Builds with the trust we’ve started to earn

Pain and happiness were all understood
The shifting of emotions were changing the mood
The tears that fell were starting to fade
Replaced with the laughter he suddenly gave

Prayers were answered of friendships that built
It’s almost as if I climbed up a hill
The pain and struggle all made sense
Because of the messages that both of us sends

Relief from a person with a heavy heart
Was never expected right from the start
I told myself I needed to breathe
And face the person I needed to meet

In time we will, in time we’ll see
And I hope you will accept me

A great big field underneath a deep blue sky
Filled with wonders of pain and delight
Each step you take is a great big mystery
It's almost as if there's no end in sight

Steps in grasses tickle your feet
Walking faster because of the joy you meet
A single step turns into pain
A tiny pebble comes out to play

You drip in sweat and cry out your tears
Looking around you, seeing what's near
You turn to see the steps you took
A delightful sight with just one look

You look back at the steps you'll take
And try to think of the choice you'll make
Behind looks a bit more fun
But forward is where you'll see the sun

A simple glance at the road ahead
You sighed aloud and then you said
"I cannot predict what the future holds,
But perhaps closer, the beauty unfolds."

You walk past the trials, the challenges and more
And now you see there is so much more
Behold a light that shines for you
Behold, you see a beautiful view

You thank the past for the road ahead
For all the treasures and lectures that's said
For life is more beautiful than what we seem
For our dreams that we may soon redeem

Are just along the road ahead
And never stop until you've reached the end

Hold me as if today would be the last
don't lose sight of everything that we have
everyday has been wonderful
don't let me let go of something as beautiful as this

All of the days I've spent with you were the greatest
each day my heart fills up with joy that no one can explain
you've been like my best friend, my partner
you mean a lot more to me that you think you know

Never was there a dull moment between us both
you make me smile, laugh and cry in a good way
never have I felt alone when I talk to you
you brought out the best in me like no one has ever had

Slowly but surely, I've grown more and more into you
honesty and transparency has been my thing
everyday, I tell you how thankful I am and what I feel about you
but always remember that no matter what happens, I'll always be with you

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Darkness fades away
Whenever I'm with you

You are like the sun
Shining so bright
Shining like the stars
In the dark blue sky

Like admiring flowers
Blossoming on the trees at spring
You make me look forward
To what tomorrow may bring

Each day with you I feel
Something I know that's real
A love with no end
Cause you are my very best friend

You know me inside and out
Known all the good and the bad
Although I have to pout
At times when things aren't rad

You're my partner, my lover
You give me love like no other
Let me stay from here on then
Cause I'll love you forever and it will never end

You kissed me underneath the moonlit sky
I sat there wondering why
We were mere friends hanging out
Why do I feel like I want to shout?

One... Two... Three seconds go by
I don't even feel like I want to fly
You won't stop kissing me
Is this what is supposed to be?

Your lips leave mine and move to my neck
Now I'm starting to feel like such a wreck
The sweet butterscotch taste, I can't comprehend
When is this going to end?

Your hand keeps moving south
And now I can taste you in my mouth
My head feels as if the world is spinning
I can't comprehend what's happening?

I'm frozen in fear
I stopped having the ability to hear
It keeps going on like a scene in a movie
All that you keep saying is "sorry"

I waited a few until you started to stop
Now I know my heart just dropped

A million words or so it seems
Of broken hearts and broken dreams
Neither of which you have no start
But it remains there inside your heart

A thousand miles you wish to sail
Hundreds of letters you wish to mail
You took the path and left alone
Longing for the treasure you have been shown

You lost your strength to keep the fight
You thought you had an end in sight
But a pretty maiden or so it seems
Keeps pushing you to pursue your dreams

You know that it is not too late
Keep pushing forward to find your fate
Someday soon you'll be able to see
A beautiful future for you and me

You know that people believe in you
I know you believe you can too

Yesterday was perfect
Like something I have always dreamt
But today is as if we're nothing
Like a book put back on the shelf

We raised a garden of roses
Beautiful but filled with thorns
Be careful what you will hold on to
Or else you will be hurt

You chose the flower
That nobody chose
You found beauty in it
Even with its flaws

Everyday petals fall
You tried to pick them up
Even with the thorns
You wouldn't even surrender

Warning signs were given everyday for you
Days and days you wouldn't listen
Each day becoming too painful
You're running our of time as so you think

Perhaps you were right
You knew all along
Roses are beautiful
But they aren't meant to last

Now you see what happens
Remember to never mess with that

Sa isang saglit ako'y tila nasa ulap
at pa lutang lutang habang ako'y dumadaan
Sa gaan ng aking pakiramdam
at sa munting ligayang di inaasahan

Kahit sa isang maigsing sandali, ako'y puno ng buhay
na tila bang lahat ng problema'y naglaho
Sa isang saglit ako'y nakaramdam ng pagmamahal
mula sa isang taong akala ko'y mapapaakin

Ngunit ito'y isang panaginip na laging babagabag sa aking damdamin
Isang saglit lamang ito
Isang araw ay maglalaho na parang bula
Hinding hindi kita mapapaakin

Siguro hindi tayo itinakda ng tadhana
Siguro hanggang dito na lang talaga tayo
Hindi mo kayang ibigay ng buo ang pagmamahal na kailangan ko
Hindi mo kayang pantayan ang pag-ibig na binibigay ko

Buong puso ko nilaan sa lahat ng aking sulatin
Sa lahat ng tula, pagkanta, pagsayaw
Nandoon ang buong puso kong nagmamahal sayo
Ngunit kahit anong pulit, hanggang dito na lang talaga

Pero ayos lang iyon
Kahit sa isang munting saglit naibuhos ko ang puso ko
Kahit sa isang saglit naramdaman kong magmahal
Walang bagay sa mundo ang kayang pumalit doon

Ikaw ay nagsilbing ilaw sa mundo kong madilim
Kahit walang pag-asa, lagi kitang tatanggapin
Bukas ang aking kamay at puso para sayo
Ngunit hindi na kitang kayang mahalin ng tulad ng dati

Kailangan kong umusad sa aking panaginip
Hinding hindi na maibabalik
Salamat sa lahat ng pag-ibig na aking naramdaman
Isa ka sa taong nasa puso ko lagi

Siguro ito ay isang pagsara ng parte ng buhay ko
Salamat sa lahat ng natutunan ko sayo

I fell in love with the sky, I fell in love with the moon
I never thought it would be that soon
For the twinkling star to fall from the sky
And fall from nothingness while I went off and sighed

A million stars spread out across
The star in my heart was the one I lost
Everyday I prayed, everyday I dreamed
"Star! Oh star! you are something more than I seemed!"

Wishes and promises were now washed away
Fell with the star so far away
Nothing to be seen nothing to be heard
Nobody understood how my heart hurt

People would point at different stars
But nobody notices what was ours
You never shined the brightest like the others
But still, my heart, it flutters

Nobody can see how beautiful you are
Nor do they wonder what you are
I'd sit and stare at you until the sun comes up
Especially when things get rough

Your beauty in my eyes is beyond comparison
The way you twinkle gives me lessons
Realizations would always flow to me
Everything else I started to see

Soon, the time will come for my favorite star to be forgotten
Just like the memories I kept, were stolen
For the unfairness of the world becomes a reality
And the world will never be as lovely

God created you from nothing
But to me, you will always be something
These lessons I will forever treasure and hold
Nor will I allow myself to be cold

"Life goes on" is what I'll do
And just know, I did it all for you

A million memories flooded in my head
In moments that I would dread
The pain of the past keeps pushing through
Perhaps they don't really care about you

Year per year the memories torn
Feeling a new you would always be reborn
Good or bad as it may seem
The old you, you can no longer redeem

Smiles and praises always said
But I can barely keep them in my head
For what's important would burst to say
"Hey, you know we'll never go away"

Each day I prayed, each day I hoped
"This day! Oh please! I wouldn't mope!"
Shards of glass cut through my chest
But still, I was still hoping for the best

This year has been so bad for me
Next year, for now, we will just see

Often times I'd stop and think what you really mean to me.
Do I love you as much as I claim to?
Or do I crave the feeling of someone who appreciates me for me?
Or I just want to feel what I feel for you?

In silence, I give myself a thousand reasons to let go
But in loudness, I give myself a million reasons to hold on.
One day, you'd be there and make me feel like I'm flying
The next, I keep staring at the screen waiting for you to acknowledge I'm here.

Am I just a pastime to cheer you up in this cruel world we're in?
Or did you really ever care about me like you say you do?
I can't find the right words to ask you
But I keep looking at your actions and tell myself "this is what it is"

I can feel my heart break a little at the thought of it.
I thought that despite this mess of a life, I found someone I can love
You gave me the strength to still hope for the better
You taught me that life is still beautiful even with all the mess

Was that all for nothing?
Were your words filled with lies?
Were all your promises a mere fragment of my imagination?
Were you not someone I hoped you were?

I wish I could tell my heart to stop
But you keep pulling me back in
I can no longer escape this cage I'm in.

Wondering in the dead of night
Our silent screams echoes in the distance
Wondering who will make the first move
As our eyes are trapped in some form of trance
My bet was you

As your eyes searched through mine
Your innocence and your shyness start to drift apart
You were just a mere boy from my imagination
Yet there you are standing right in front of me
Hoping this is what it should be

My heart is beating out of my chest
As you come closer to me with all this intensity inside of you
My head is reeling and my hands are shaking
With each step you take, I am closer and closer to your heart
I start to wonder what I did to deserve this

Yesterday, I fell deeply in love with you
Your sincerity, I could feel even from miles apart
Your words get me in a daze, dreaming of a life I wish I had
Your songs keep echoing in my head like a thousand hummingbirds singing to me
But your figure etching in my head like some sort of masterpiece I've known by heart

Our lips dance with the melody of music brought about our hearts
The constant beating of two drums, beating at the same rate
The type of music I could listen to for a lifetime
I knew what this meant to me
I knew what I wish this could be

The night goes by in heavenly bliss
Every inch of me explored and opened up for your entertainment
Each part of my soul offered in exchange for your heart
As each second passes by, our hearts are united as one
Each moment has been recorded in my mind

As it all ends, you drift in a deep sleep
As I look at every inch of you, my heart fills with delight
You are the one I have been waiting for
You are the man I have been longing for
Next thing I know, the sweet tears I've  waited to come start to drip

Another minute passes and I stop to think
"Will tomorrow be the same as this?"