jacky

jacky Jan 2014

this feeling is tremendously anew
my friends find it normal
my best ones find it hard to see
I find it how I find it -
revolving around you

a girl falling for a girl
is not new but it is bewildering
even for me who accepts the truth
that I may be really falling for you

It does not hurt (right now)
knowing you might never want me back
but the feeling is strong,
it does not hold back

it’s a scratch deep
with what they say
you feel a scratch more
than a wound deep to your skin

I like it, and I won’t deny it
I like a girl, and it feels good
feeling like this for the first time
letting it all go, not afraid of the hurt

I told my friends of the certain changes that has occurred to me when I entered college and they were surprised. I anticipated that, but I felt like they need more time to accept the changes in me. And I have to give them that time. This girl, she's special. for me, at least. And I am glad that I felt this way for her. I hope I get the chance to know her more.

(She asked me to go to a concert with her, guys!)

jacky Jan 2014

hold me

can’t stop thinking about your hands
and how badly I want them
intertwined with mine
but there’s more to that, them
that I’d like to feel
I want to touch them
feel the creases, its lines
follow every path that they’ll take me
and course through your skin
your bones, especially the tiny ones
that keeps them together
you keep me together
caress your fingernails
painted to match the colour of your skin
the top of your hand,
which beats into veins visible at touch
the narrow holes on your knuckles
and the spaces in between them
they are perfect
it feels perfect
you are perfect
and in every inch your fine fingers extend
they’re the only ones
who could touch me
and the only hands
that will forever be soft, careful, and loving
and no matter what cuts its skin
your hands, love
hold the life in me, and keeps my soul
caged in your soul
your hands will forever
hols me still
holding you

I have this terrible urge to hold her hand today. Yes, her.

jacky Jan 2014

haiku and me

just like me my love
we will never be enough
satisfying you

I kind of developed a hatred towards haiku but I think I can compromise. They never seem enough for me, with my babbling mouth, but sometimes, it's very artistic that we can create poetry out of what? 17 words in total.

jacky Jan 2014

one night stand

it is up to this date
that I no longer create
an image, an experience
I will never forget
the taste the smell
the way you inhale and exhale
will never be changed
between your lips, into my thighs
later we move up to my sleeves
breathing me in and out
it is that I no longer locate
the images I used to create
you complete the process
of you inside me
crawling up to my spine
into my mouth
I taste you, and you taste me
it is up to this date
that I no longer locate
the depth of your hold
the sweetness of you being bold
and the taste of you
oh, so blind
how come
heaven hasn’t come
hell hasn’t seen
that you and I
will forever be on the seam
hunger for the taste
longing for the smell
here in my tongue
I’ll forever remember
that up to this date
I’ll never state
that you, were once
paralleled my fate

Disclaimer: All are figures of my imagination.

My mum would freak out if she gets her hands to this and I would laugh my head off.

jacky Jan 2014

innocent

in all fairness
it isn’t your fault
that you graced me
with all you beauty
only the gods could’ve made
and the angles could’ve woven

and I cannot blame you
for my little beating heart
lies in the sidewalks of you smile
taking camps building campfires
in your burning eyes
in second and third degrees

in all fairness
you’ve done nothing wrong
but be perfect as you are
lashes long
tattoos along
all is just to heavenly in feeling

and I cannot blame you
in all sense
that I can wring out in my
dry but full mind
filled with me
*falling deep into you

It's Jesse Rutherford who inspired me in this one. It's his eyes, voice, and tattoos that makes me want to fall more and more in love with him... and it's not his fault. Not entirely.

jacky Jan 2014

incandescent

darkness fills me up
I am not scared
I am not nervous
it is in peace
when you start
to conjure
that behind your eyelids
are the infinite number of stars
glowing in your
own kind of dark
eyes beginning to adjust
and to my surprise
it is you more
incandescent**
of them billion stars

Inspired

I always think that eyes are the best part of any human being

jacky Jan 2014

fall

no promises of tomorrow
you lie awake waiting for everything to fall -
everything into their righteous places
the stars to fall
the leaves in autumn to crumble
sway and fall
the apple
the flow of a water fall

everything did,
but one thing didn't.

he still did not fall in love with you.

i am just sleepless and waiting