You standing over there
In your mind without a care
A glance turned into a glare
Say it's simple but I cannot even bare
The thought of you sitting next to me
And loving me but just as friends

Will I ever recover from my own betrayal
Will I ever learn the lesson without leaving a trail
Will I ever shield my heart against feelings that need be tamed
Will I ever find someone widly into me without driving myself insane

I can't hide how I feel on the inside
Its unfair to myself to lead a stray path
I can't help but lose control and let my mind wonder off
It's unlikely she feels the same but here I am in front of her gate

We spend time together it feels great
Until I'm alone and realise this is not fate
I'm stuck in a ticking time bomb destruction well in place
I cannot face the reality that she does not feel the same

Lately it feels as though we've grown closer
My mind is open my conscious is unclear
I cannot bring myself to accept my fears
Rejection isn't painful it's the after tears

And so I lay here in my bed feeling a bit blue
Thinking of all the scenarios on how to get you
Wrestling my feelings that cause me pain
I know one day things could change but for now all I feel is shame


In these words I speak they come to me like a breeze
You put me in a craze and I'm lost for days
I'm trying to get over you but still in a haze
Counting down the hours till I'm locked in your cage

Just to hear the words you relay to me
Resonate with my heart as it beats
To the point I can't take it anymore
It's taken all I've got not to feel some more

A chance she didn't give me one I'd surely *****
All the broken pieces scattered around the room
I saw my own reflection and immediately felt gloom
It's hard to find the glue to put together something that's not true

The words feel great because she is my muse
I'm wrecking my brain somehow I feel abused
I'm still amused at how she makes me smile
The whole time I just want to her to be mine

I don't often fit in but there is a place
Here in my heart were she makes me feel great
I can't deal with the pace it's moving too fast
So I'd rather be in a space were my eyes are closed and I feel safe

The blue the green the gold
A radiance on her face she glows
Her aura in the room and it flows
She stole my attention and it shows

The colours that float around the room
Your blue is so cold and hard to break through
You protect yourself like an armour
Shielded against the wounds that is your blue

Your green for all that you are & believe in
Like an army you stand tall and never defeated
You'd fight until the death than not try at all
And in your stance a guardian shall never fall

The gold came shining through the moment I met you,your eyes carried a pain I could relate to, so as I hold this pen and reiterate the lines to you
I'm glistened by your gold that shimmers through, I couldn't shake it off my earth rocked by you

The music to my ears the sound of her voice it flows
A beacon of light to my eyes the radiance of her face it glows
A dagger I felt in my heart her rejection froze me cold
As soft as a mothers touch on my skin her hold on me continues to grow

Another mistake my heart cant take
Another past transgression hard to break
Give me a chance give me a chance
I want to give and not take
A chance to get to know you

I promise you wont regret it
I'll leave you feeling over the moon

The light that you speak about me on
Is so bright that I am blinded
Not so often comes a frame of time
That I am not thinking about you

I'm rock climbing to your heart but
One of the pieces fell to the ground
They smeared across the floor as I watched
I didn't panic because like a diamond I'll love you to pieces

To let go is to let loose
The ropes that tied us together
Are the same loose ends left on my hand
From when you decided to severe all ties with me

Do I make peace with it or break free
Do I let my mind wonder off or get cold
Does she think about me or forget about me
Does she wish she gave me a chance or never knew me

A right that turned wrong
Upon us was a storm
Came back together when we parted
Now stuck in the debris of our love

Some days are good
Some days are bad
And today is that day
When it all came flooding back

She wouldn't say a single thing at all
She kept her words to herself
There's no telling what's behind the closed door
It's hard to unlock as she threw away the key

Backed against a wall and still wouldn't fall
Her words picked so carefully like roses I'm pricked by the throne
Her poisonous traits out in the open but I still see no flaws
When I'm talking to you it's as though I'm searching for treasure

Will I find gold?
Or are you really just cold?
Am I eluding myself?
Is there something yet to unfold?

You keep me guessing nothing is certain
You close like a curtain you're taking control
Say you want to possess me but soon as I pose the question
I'm picking up pieces of your story from the floor

You close the blinds on me and I'm certain
No punch will ever feel so it broke my jaw
Nothing comes between you and your happiness
You know your worth and that's why you're a queen
Left the keys to the throne watch as they all fall
To your command because your influence can be felt

I'm looking into your eyes their reflection got me blind
I'm listening to your words turn me around like a vinyl
I'm willing to explore the sensations that got me wild
The chills in my spine nothing near the word mild

My hands rubbing on your body now that has definitely crossed my mind
I'm running out of time so you're looking like some fine wine
Just like my feelings for you grew overtime
A sip, a taste ,a gulp now I'm splashing into your waterfalls

I seen something within you and my feelings come through
Your sexiness put it on a map for everybody to see so appealing but words they shine through
You say you don't mean it but I know you do
A power you held against me I still haven't moved

A seduction a reaction to what you feel
You want me as your possession but soon as I pose the question
You ain't ready to make a decision
You say your words with so much precision

If heaven was filled with all my favourite things one of them would be you
If hell's gates were closing with I'd still try and save you
Least to say you treat me like trash but still I'm bagging you
The walls feel so thick and the air is thin when I'm with you

Even when you're long gone the feelings still remain
I can't restrain myself from being attracted to you
Your response left me with nothing absolutely no clue
Moment I laid my eyes on you it felt like they were glued

You were never for keeps just for the thrill
I'd chase shadows first than believe in you
Because behind all the smiles you've felt some pain too
In the blinking mist of my confusion your silhouette shines through
A delicate flower I uprooted nothing to find so I'm blue

I didn't know I was falling until
I could taste the dirt in my mouth
It Equalled a taste of satisfaction
A feeling so good yet I'm caught in this bad contraption

A grip she held against me struck standing still
Cant blame me if the connection was real
I couldn't feel all the aches from the break she gave my heart
Hard to imagine the waves without a bit of traction my love

Her reaction as I broke down the news
She crumbled but life isn't apple pie
Nothing sweet about it
In her mouth a bitter taste remains

I use these words as my safe haven
They cradle me to my sleep
They appear in my dreams
And sweep me off my feet,**** these words they know me

These words they make me feel so free
To the point I rely on them so I don't have to speak
They tell me I'm so sweet like a decadent cherry on top of a treat
My happiest moments are when these words let me be

But these are the words that robbed me of my peace
They placed me under arrest
And told me to lay down and not get back on my feet
They convinced me that the only way out was to accept defeat

These words put me in a choke hold
They slammed me against the wall until my throat hurt
They suffocated me to the point I was too weak
These words told me not to dare speak

With no contest I felt the descent
I plead guilty to letting these words use me
I wasn't in control and so these words knew
How to use me until I felt so drained
My very own words locked me up inside a cage

I don't know where I'm headed
but I'd rather be there with you

A troubled soul who couldn't tell you what her problem was
She couldn't pinpoint the root that kept her grounded
But she would tell you to break a branch from her tree
She wasn't afraid to be naked, to be without her leaves...

The scars that run the deepest
Show the secrets behind your pain
And I know you will always be here for me
You said it yourself there is no "I" in team

Did I really have to flush down my memories with the drugs?
It's just that I find comfort in the adrenaline rush
Why should I not take my next hit?
What am I saving my lungs for?

So on this jet I'm about to take flight
A flicker of light as I take in my first height
I've never been this high before
I've never seen the world for what it's for

I abuse the drugs so much they start to use me
They tell me when to speak when to eat heck even when to sleep
I'm enthused by the rush that I feel when I take that first puff
In my blood stream the toxins they rush