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I stand on the scale I look at the number I'm fat I way over 140lbs What am I doing wrong? I barely eat anything She steps off the scale Walks over to the counter And opens the cupboard Peanut butter She untwists the twisty ties Grabs two pieces of white bread Places them in the toaster slots Pulls down the lever For ten seconds Pulls it up Pulls it down Waits ten more seconds Pulls it up Takes it out Spreads the peanutty butter across the crisp edges Starts eating it Nom nom nom Her dog moves close to the counter And begs She walks away Drops a few crumbs And the dog eats it up And follows her into the living room And looks up Nom nom nom nom She just looks at the dog Puts her bare foot against his nose Which is cold And the dog doesn't even move Sticks his tongue outside his mouth And breathes quickly Stupid She puts her foot back down And moves it against the rug a few times Then walks into the kitchen And opens a bag Of salt and vinegar chips Starts eating them Nom nom nom nom Dog catches the crumbs and slides against the kitchen floor She walks back upstairs And the dog follows her To her room She shuts the door And the dog starts scratching through the bottom And barks She just lays in her bed Eating The dog barks again She opens the door And pushes him With her right foot Down the stairs He tumbles down the stairs and hits the kitchen floor He races back up Gets pushed back down Dog runs away She walks towards the bathroom And uses the other scale And she sees that it says 141 lbs I've only been eating for a few minutes Errrr She closes the bag of chips And stomps downstairs And places the bag on the counter Dog waits in the living room Right next to the kitchen His food bowl is empty No water
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Dec 8, 2014
Dec 8, 2014 at 6:49 PM UTC
What Do You Have To Lose?
I stand on the scale I look at the number I'm fat I way over 140lbs What am I doing wrong? I barely eat anything She steps off the scale Walks over to the counter And opens the cupboard Peanut butter She untwists the twisty ties Grabs two pieces of white bread Places them in the toaster slots Pulls down the lever For ten seconds Pulls it up Pulls it down Waits ten more seconds Pulls it up Takes it out Spreads the peanutty butter across the crisp edges Starts eating it Nom nom nom Her dog moves close to the counter And begs She walks away Drops a few crumbs And the dog eats it up And follows her into the living room And looks up Nom nom nom nom She just looks at the dog Puts her bare foot against his nose Which is cold And the dog doesn't even move Sticks his tongue outside his mouth And breathes quickly Stupid She puts her foot back down And moves it against the rug a few times Then walks into the kitchen And opens a bag Of salt and vinegar chips Starts eating them Nom nom nom nom Dog catches the crumbs and slides against the kitchen floor She walks back upstairs And the dog follows her To her room She shuts the door And the dog starts scratching through the bottom And barks She just lays in her bed Eating The dog barks again She opens the door And pushes him With her right foot Down the stairs He tumbles down the stairs and hits the kitchen floor He races back up Gets pushed back down Dog runs away She walks towards the bathroom And uses the other scale And she sees that it says 141 lbs I've only been eating for a few minutes Errrr She closes the bag of chips And stomps downstairs And places the bag on the counter Dog waits in the living room Right next to the kitchen His food bowl is empty No water
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Dec 8, 2014
Dec 8, 2014 at 6:49 PM UTC
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