Wanna Be My Friend?

nathan-squiers Poems

Let's break all the tension with the pretense of my presence. Yes, I'm insensitive--but there's no other incentive others can give-- And while I'm not sure I could prevent it, I swear to no god I'm inventive! Yes, My hatred is incessant--ever present--and it's what I hold most sacred. I'm a naughty narcissist with a nasty list of wasted kisses, And I won't say that I'll miss 'em, 'cuz I'm the type who never misses. I'm a hopeless romantic with a new sense of Tantric hope, It's the antics of a frantic mind, but I'm too calm to cope. They say I'm a raving, violent--rarely silent--tyrant with a craving for the obscene, Though, while I'm mean, I'm rarely seen within a mob or in a scene. I'll admit I've got a streak, but--if you'd stop to take a peek-- You'd see a Buddhist, not a nudist, who's less a demon than a geek. I'm oblique and I'm obtuse (do these math puns work for you?) yet I'm rarely never right; Get my angle? Catch my drift? I might thrash, but, man, I'm thrift! Hold on shift: I'M SCREAMING NOW!! Don't know why; don't have a cow! Remember that? That 90's rap? Look at me then; that piece of crap! Shot down! Torn up! Shut in! Turned out! Lips are sealed; inside I'd shout, 'Bout just how bad I wanted out! Enraged and crazed; cravin' razors; a victim hiding from all saviors! Turned to the pen to brace for the knife, Started writin' and saved my life. It's funny to say my life got better the day I started a suicide letter... But letters turned to words and those words became whole worlds, And before my very eyes a whole legacy unfurled! I was GOD--not just a slob--but a shaper of all things, And the schemes that I'd been dreaming shifted into scribing, And I never stopped since then; it's why I'm still alive! So my insanity became vanity as calamity turned to amity. Sheer pessimism became untamed narcissism, But if the mind's a prison then consider me jail broken. Outspoken, re-awoken; take a moment to let that soak in. That a boy doubtful of tomorrow could ditch the sorrow, And become an immortal--though immoral, not totally amoral. So yea, I've got my faults; I'm a sensory assault, And while I don't mean to offend I'm just a product of the ends. Played with fire; I got burned. Dared to aspire; I was turned. So I inquire to you sires as I march out of the fires: You've seen my darkness and know my story--beginning, middle, end-- My name is Nathan Squiers, do you wanna be my friend?