the first day I met you,
I wasn't breaking any rules.
I told my mom, "i'm going to meet a friend of a friend"
and she said, "sounds good, have fun."
we did have a lot of fun.
at first, you were a friend of a friend,
but then our connection shifted instantaneously
and we selfishly thought it would never end.
11 days passed,
and suddenly, I wanted to call you mine.
even though I didn't know you at all.
18 days later,
I left for a week.
you sent me a paragraph every day I was gone
to help me remember
that someone still cared.
throughout the next 51 days,
we became even more infatuated with each other.
from 8 PM to 9 PM every night,
we would text like our lives depended on it.
rules weren't being broken,
but lines were being crossed.
then, on August 9th, we played manhunt.
hiding behind a generator, you sat next to me.
then your hand was in mine.
then your arm was around my shoulder.
and then we were making silent promises,
3 words that mean the world to someone.
I got home 20 minutes later than my mom would have liked.
I didn't tell her anything that happened between us.
she was not very fond of you,
because I broke the rules for you.
22 days passed,
we were planning our next get-together.
I invited at least twenty-five people
just so I could see one.
August 31st was the last time we were happy together.
it was the last time I had all your love
it was the last time that our irises met
with nothing but sparks.
then, silence.
but not the kind that I hated.
it was the silence of waiting
for a time to see you again.
in my head, you still 'loved' me,
and in my head, you were still mine.
I wasn't allowed to message you in any form,
because I broke a lot of rules,
so instead, I waited for a while.
our friend said he'd try
to set something up for us.
on September 28th,
I asked you to come to a group hangout.
you were dry,
said we needed to talk.
I was worried about you,
about what was wrong,
but never once had the notion,
that 'we' were now gone.
October 3rd, 3 PM,
a funny day for someone to dump you.
to the world, it's a lovely holiday,
because Aaron asked Cady what day it was.
"It's October 3rd."
to me, it's the day that you left me.
it's the day of my first heartbreak.
it's the day you told me you never loved me
without even looking me in the eye.
I never said what I wanted to,
never got to tell you my feelings,
and it's been 150 days since October 3rd,
and I still catch myself missing you.
we were together for 135 days,
or wait, was it 102?
I guess it depends on how you look at things,
how things seem from your own point of view.
it was enough time to teach me some lessons,
like broken people make other people broken,
and when he loves you, he shows you,
and when something isn't meant to be,
it will end.
in the end, i'm glad I broke rules for you.
because you ending things made me a better person.
I've become stronger, smarter, and more sure of myself,
I just wish you could say the same.
Mar 2
Mar 2, 2026 at 1:26 PM UTC
the first day I met you,
I wasn't breaking any rules.
I told my mom, "i'm going to meet a friend of a friend"
and she said, "sounds good, have fun."
we did have a lot of fun.
at first, you were a friend of a friend,
but then our connection shifted instantaneously
and we selfishly thought it would never end.
11 days passed,
and suddenly, I wanted to call you mine.
even though I didn't know you at all.
18 days later,
I left for a week.
you sent me a paragraph every day I was gone
to help me remember
that someone still cared.
throughout the next 51 days,
we became even more infatuated with each other.
from 8 PM to 9 PM every night,
we would text like our lives depended on it.
rules weren't being broken,
but lines were being crossed.
then, on August 9th, we played manhunt.
hiding behind a generator, you sat next to me.
then your hand was in mine.
then your arm was around my shoulder.
and then we were making silent promises,
3 words that mean the world to someone.
I got home 20 minutes later than my mom would have liked.
I didn't tell her anything that happened between us.
she was not very fond of you,
because I broke the rules for you.
22 days passed,
we were planning our next get-together.
I invited at least twenty-five people
just so I could see one.
August 31st was the last time we were happy together.
it was the last time I had all your love
it was the last time that our irises met
with nothing but sparks.
then, silence.
but not the kind that I hated.
it was the silence of waiting
for a time to see you again.
in my head, you still 'loved' me,
and in my head, you were still mine.
I wasn't allowed to message you in any form,
because I broke a lot of rules,
so instead, I waited for a while.
our friend said he'd try
to set something up for us.
on September 28th,
I asked you to come to a group hangout.
you were dry,
said we needed to talk.
I was worried about you,
about what was wrong,
but never once had the notion,
that 'we' were now gone.
October 3rd, 3 PM,
a funny day for someone to dump you.
to the world, it's a lovely holiday,
because Aaron asked Cady what day it was.
"It's October 3rd."
to me, it's the day that you left me.
it's the day of my first heartbreak.
it's the day you told me you never loved me
without even looking me in the eye.
I never said what I wanted to,
never got to tell you my feelings,
and it's been 150 days since October 3rd,
and I still catch myself missing you.
we were together for 135 days,
or wait, was it 102?
I guess it depends on how you look at things,
how things seem from your own point of view.
it was enough time to teach me some lessons,
like broken people make other people broken,
and when he loves you, he shows you,
and when something isn't meant to be,
it will end.
in the end, i'm glad I broke rules for you.
because you ending things made me a better person.
I've become stronger, smarter, and more sure of myself,
I just wish you could say the same.
this is not very flowy. more just a brain dump.