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sparrowsoaringPoems
I did I think But it's been years Years Years When I was not And I don't remember quite What being well is like I mean I mean I am always well I am Always moving Because an object at rest- I've said this already So I'll rest when I'm dead Or I'll die when I rest And I'm not ready yet I haven't made my mark yet I haven't swelled my voice With the chorus of those who came before me yet I haven't heard that note One note In a symphony The glorious harmony I Haven't drawn a breath and Heard the empty space and Felt the sharp ***** of awe That the gap Is for me to fill Little me Little Gap And that I think Holds me here Roots my feet to the ground To Earth Because humans Are delicate It would not take so much To flee this mortal form But I am not ready It is not my time I am secure Knowing my days are numbered Measured out By One Who does not lose count Lose thought Think All in the wrong order At all the times Which are Most inopportune It is my greatest honor It is my greatest humbling And anyways I am well Well enough to sing To dance Well enough for joy To light its fire Bursting pyrotechnics In my chest Except Of course When I am not Not when my thoughts Take the wheel And I am caught in loops Loops Loops "Shape without form Shade without color" I drift In monochromatic waves Clinging to the memory And hope of hues Beyond my mind's walls I drift In soft piano melodies And synesthesia winds my senses In a great tangle Melancholy tastes like apple But un-achored Only smells like dust Looping and twirling in the breeze Over the ocean Invisible Under the too-wide sky Over the too-bright sea Until it hits city And the city Brings it back down Tears it into a million Tiny Fragments They used to be it They used to be whole They were once But now Not And just like that The conclusion Brings me down With a jolt and a bump and a thud Like a plane Or the clanking chains Of a rollarcoaster My stomach is doing rollarcoaster loops Loops Loops I used to be well- (i've said that too) -But sometimes I am well Now And I forget That with a breath I can be Not It is terrifying But I am not scared You know Part of life Is living it
0
May 25, 2018
May 25, 2018 at 9:54 PM UTC
I used to be well
I did I think But it's been years Years Years When I was not And I don't remember quite What being well is like I mean I mean I am always well I am Always moving Because an object at rest- I've said this already So I'll rest when I'm dead Or I'll die when I rest And I'm not ready yet I haven't made my mark yet I haven't swelled my voice With the chorus of those who came before me yet I haven't heard that note One note In a symphony The glorious harmony I Haven't drawn a breath and Heard the empty space and Felt the sharp ***** of awe That the gap Is for me to fill Little me Little Gap And that I think Holds me here Roots my feet to the ground To Earth Because humans Are delicate It would not take so much To flee this mortal form But I am not ready It is not my time I am secure Knowing my days are numbered Measured out By One Who does not lose count Lose thought Think All in the wrong order At all the times Which are Most inopportune It is my greatest honor It is my greatest humbling And anyways I am well Well enough to sing To dance Well enough for joy To light its fire Bursting pyrotechnics In my chest Except Of course When I am not Not when my thoughts Take the wheel And I am caught in loops Loops Loops "Shape without form Shade without color" I drift In monochromatic waves Clinging to the memory And hope of hues Beyond my mind's walls I drift In soft piano melodies And synesthesia winds my senses In a great tangle Melancholy tastes like apple But un-achored Only smells like dust Looping and twirling in the breeze Over the ocean Invisible Under the too-wide sky Over the too-bright sea Until it hits city And the city Brings it back down Tears it into a million Tiny Fragments They used to be it They used to be whole They were once But now Not And just like that The conclusion Brings me down With a jolt and a bump and a thud Like a plane Or the clanking chains Of a rollarcoaster My stomach is doing rollarcoaster loops Loops Loops I used to be well- (i've said that too) -But sometimes I am well Now And I forget That with a breath I can be Not It is terrifying But I am not scared You know Part of life Is living it
This was supposed to be More coherent
#lymedisease#lyme#synesthesia#tired
sparrowsoaring
Written by
sparrowsoaring
20/F/somewhere
May 25, 2018
May 25, 2018 at 9:54 PM UTC
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