I’m sorry

I know there are days where I burn at both ends

And not even your cool waters can subdue these flames

I

Regret every word that’s burned past these lips

I didn’t mean to take you for granted

I swear

I didn’t mean to point out your stretch marks and laugh lines

I didn’t mean to forget your birthday  

I

just lose myself sometimes

Like

Last night when I laid in the darkness of our bedroom

And stretched out to feel how cold the other side of the bed was

And I

could hear your voice keeping me awake like white noise whispering
from some other room

And I just can’t seem to turn it off

I know that this is broken and left for dead

Forgotten in a box in an attic in some house

somewhere

Nostalgia’s never seemed so bitter

Because sometimes I smell you

And my heart breaks a million times a day

I got a box of red confetti here

Barely beats

Buckles my knees when it does

Beats me breathless

Holds me under

Keeps me back

Makes me wonder

Where everything turned sour like milk

Mighta seen your face on the side of that milk carton

I’d’ve known

I should’ve let you go

But I couldn’t

Not so soon

If I had my way it’d been never

Now all I got is this sound

White noise coming from some other room

Sounds like laughter sometimes

Sounds like music

Sounds like my heart shatter confetti burst

Feels like crawling skin

The lightest touch that almost tickles

Press harder if you could

I can almost feel you

Sounds like a match being lit

Lettin’ me burn at both ends