Today I woke up,
and put my pants on backwards.
Today I sat down,
and drank coffee out of a pipe.
Today I got up,
and ripped my socks wide open.
Today I ate food,
and it sat with me like an elephant.
Today I laughed,
and my makeup smeared.
Today I cried,
and I **** near bust a gut.
Today I got bored,
and then I stopped being bored.
Today I went to sleep,
and I stopped calling it "today."
Today I dreamed,
and I couldn't move well.

Today went just as I expected.