The morning I walked into church
Decked out in ripped jeans and an oversized sweater
Was the aftermath of the first night
I had ever tasted *****.
To think I thought I could hide my first binge
But as soon as I met my mom
My hair unruly and my makeup smeared
Mom takes one whiff of me
"Were you drinking?"
Me, panicked and on the defensive
"No, I just overslept."
It's funny how we try to hide things
That are bleeding all over our hands
Tattooed all over our faces
The difference is
Sometimes people actively choose to ignore it.
Like when I was throwing up Thanksgiving dinner
I had every tell-tale sign of a bulimic
But my family turned a blind eye.
Nobody asked me why I locked myself in the bathroom for hours
Nobody asked my why I weighed myself 12 times a day
Everyone thought it was wonderful I was losing so much weight
Over a short period of time.
Well I didn't know there was a prize
For losing eleven pounds in a week
For becoming a sack of rattling bones
Stitched together by pockets of fat
I was not a person during that time
And I thought I was hiding it well
But really,
People just chose not to see it.
How can we pretend these things do not exist?
While some people say
That they have skeletons in their closet
When in reality
They left the door open
And we chose to walk right past it.