There was always a silence
Right before he would rest his eager lips
on her shivering back and she would swallow her tears and strengthen her voice to say
Not now babe, I'm having another one.
She would beg him with her eyes to understand her and stay patient
But in dark rooms like those
And her back against his mouth
He was never able to see her prayer
So all he saw was another dark cloud over his always so beautiful day
And she couldn't even blame him for leaving

It's been a year
But she still wonders every day
What if we would meet again now that I'm stronger
But then again
What if I will love him so much
That I lose myself in it
The exact same way I did