before you left, i could already feel my bones aching to be next to yours.
you were sitting in front of me with my hands placed in yours,
and your thumbs brushing against my knuckles,
"i think i might have to leave for a little bit" you had quietly said
"but only for a little bit"
but before you could even reassure me, i was already
trying to pull my hands out of yours, but hold them all at the same
time,
trying to sit further away from you to take a better look, but trying to
keep warm next to you.
i need you to do what you need to do for yourself, i need you
to keep getting better and improving every second, i want you to succeed,
achieve, you are plenty of amazing all in one person and i question every
moment how someone like you had kept smiling with someone like me.
i need myself
to stop feeling so ******* let down every time you are away
because it's not your fault, it's just how life goes -
sometimes things happen that tear us away from each other,
it just feels so hard being away from you all the time because all
i want is to be with you.
i've been realizing how many bad things are in this world and
there are not many more good things left that i can appreciate
and you, darling, you are one of those last good things that i can
depend on to always smooth the goosebumps out of my skin.
i love you so much. i love you so much, it nearly kills me
to admit that i need you and i wish i didn't need you this much